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Original poster

Found the ring and it doesn't fit, help!

38 replies

Ruineditformyself · 20/12/2018 13:59

So my boyfriend has been acting a bit strange re my Xmas presents this year so I had an inkling he was maybe going to propose. The other night when I was moving one of his jackets a jewellery box fell out the pocket but it was bigger than a ring box so I opened it and realised straight away it was a ring. I closed the box without really seeing the ring so didn't know what it looked like.
I have tried to forget about it but this morning when he went to work I checked and it was still there and stupidly opened the box and took the ring out, it really is a beautiful ring but it's too small!
I am absolutely gutted that 1. iv ruined the surprise for myself and 2. I won't be able to wear it on Xmas day.
What the hell do I do? I know that's a stupid question because I can't tell him I found it and ruin the surprise element for him but I also know he will be gutted on the day to find that it doesn't fit me.
I thought that I would still be surprised and emotional when he proposed as I don't know when he is going to do it and also would be looking forward to him actually putting the ring on but now when it happens I'm going to know that it doesn't fit so don't know how I will actually feel when he does it.
I wish I hadn't have looked again today, any tips on what I can do?

OP posts:
loadofcrap10 · 20/12/2018 14:01

Are you 100% sure it's for you??
Just asking...........

Kikidelivers · 20/12/2018 14:02

Nothing you do
Just get resized afterwards

And stop snooping!

VietnameseCrispyFish · 20/12/2018 14:02

Just forget about it and when he proposes it won’t be a big deal that it doesn’t fit, you can exchange it or have it made larger.

Sorry OP but you did a really shitty thing to your partner. He’s obviously wanting to propose as a surprise and you’ve purposefully ruined it. Coming across it by mistake is one thing, going back to try it on like a little kid searching the house for his xmas gifts early is really awful.

Not to mention, how are you more focused on the size of the ring than the fact your boyfriend is going to ask you to marry him? Really?

Maybe he’ll be a bit gutted it doesn’t fit (doubt it, if he was that bothered he’d have found a way to buy a ring that does fit), but I bet he’d be a whole lot more gutted that you’ve ruined the surprise, been back to have another peek, tried the ring on and then hidden it all from him. Is this a wind up?

NonaGrey · 20/12/2018 14:03

Stop looking in his pockets to start with!

That aside the ring isn’t the important thing in an engagement. The relationship is the important thing.

The ring is merely a symbol.

He’ll propose you’ll accept and everyone will be terribly happy.

The ring is irrelevant to that.

What you do is plaster a smile on your face, tell him it’s beautiful and make a lovely day trip out of visiting the jewellers together to get it resized.

This isn’t a catastrophe. It’s just a minor inconvenience.

Ellisandra · 20/12/2018 14:04

You moved his jacket and the box fell out.
Riiiiiiiight Grin

For heaven’s sake.
The surprise isn’t really that important in the long run.
Just make sure you have a nice delicate chain to hand so you can wear it round your neck to show it off to people. Or just show them the box and say you’re getting it sized.

You’re focusing on the showy parts here, not the marriage.

And - stop rifling through his pockets Grin

Drogosnextwife · 20/12/2018 14:04

😂 that's what I was going to say.

All you can do is wait and then have the size changed, not really any magic solutions for that one.

SparklyMagpie · 20/12/2018 14:06

Well you better hope it is for you 😂

OopsInamechangedagain · 20/12/2018 14:07

How very fortunate that the ring fell out of his pocket inside the house and not in the street or wherever seeing as it fell from his jacket so easily Hmm

ChanklyBore · 20/12/2018 14:08

Not sure why you have acted as you have tbh. Firstly its was never going to be a surprise as you say in your first sentence you thought he was going to propose. Secondly you opened a jewellery box when you found it. Thirdly you went back, took it out and put it on? Fourthly you have assumed it is both an engagement ring AND that it is for you.

Proposing really isn’t my thing and I would not enjoy being proposed to especially at Christmas as it would ruin the day. I’m assuming you are planning on saying yes if it is an engagement ring and if it is for you?

If so, you only have one course of action open to you in my opinion.

Go and buy a ring you like (for you or for him, or both, whatever suits you) and propose on Christmas Day. Then you get to wear a ring and get back the element of surprise you wanted. Win/win.

gamerchick · 20/12/2018 14:09

Put it on a chain and get it sorted later.

Original poster
Ruineditformyself · 20/12/2018 14:19

Lol its definitely for me.
His jacket was over the chair and I lifted it to hang it up, I know I shouldn't have went back to look today and really wish I hadnt.
I'm definitely not more bothered about the size of the ring than the fact he's going to propose or our relationship, I just wasn't sure how easy it was to make a ring bigger, if it was too big it would be easier for me to wear it but I actually can't get this on, but it seems like it's easy enough to do and I'm sure it will still be a lovely moment when it happens.
Good idea about having a chain to hand, that will work till we can get it resized.

OP posts:
bellinibobble · 20/12/2018 14:55

My proposal was a surprise but we chose my ring together so it didn't matter that re-sizing was needed.

I'd be so gutted for ruining the surprise by finding the ring but trying it on and finding it doesn't fit?!? It's going to ruin the whole moment for you.. what a shame :(

IAmALionessHearMeRoar · 20/12/2018 14:56

It might just be a Xmas present. not a proposal.

chill out OP

QforCucumber · 20/12/2018 14:59

My ring was too big, the next day we went to the jewellers to ask for it to be resized, they had my actual size in store so did a straight swap exchange instead. Easy.

knittedjest · 20/12/2018 15:03

Just wear it on a chain around your neck until you can get it resized.

Armchairanarchist · 20/12/2018 15:13

It's easy to get them resized. I have ring size J (my engagement ring fits my preteen DD) and mine now fit perfectly and you can't tell.

riotlady · 20/12/2018 15:23

Not sure why people are having a go about you going back to try it on, it’s exciting!! I probably would have done the same.

Anyway, don’t say anything, act surprised, get it resized later

KNain · 20/12/2018 16:24

Something similar happened to me. I didn't 100% know my now DH was going to propose but a few things made me suspicious and we had a big holiday coming up.

I have really skinny fingers and I knew a ring would be too big. So I bought a costume jewellery ring and some of those ring snuggies (available for delivery before Christmas via Amazon!) Then I wore the cheap ring and snuggie for a while beforehand so it wasn't too obvious.

When he proposed he noticed the ring didn't fit but I just took the cheap ring off and used the snuggie off it. I wore it like that until we got back from holiday and got it resized.

The snuggie was awkward and not the most attractive but at least it meant I could wear the ring straightaway, and it was fine as a temporary solution.

Deadringer · 20/12/2018 16:33

I would have tried it on too op, perfectly reasonable thing to do imo. It's a gift, it's for you, and you found it by accident. You didn't break into someone's house, crack open their safe and try it. The ring not fitting will not spoil the proposal, what a load of old tosh! It's the relationship and the (later) marriage that matter, not some silly notion about the 'perfect' proposal.

Dirtybadger · 20/12/2018 17:13

You've ruined the surprise anyway. If it was me I wouldn't tell him I found it, then propose yourself the day before. At least someone gets a surprise then Grin
Explain after what happened.

I know my DP would like that given but maybe not everyone would. But it seems a bit dishonest and odd to just pretend you didn't know now....although I can see why people might do that. Its all a bit conceited and false.

Congrats in advance.....hopefully!!

Katgurl · 20/12/2018 18:03

Congrats in advance.

Ah that's a shame you found out but his method of proposing will still be a surprise.

poglets · 20/12/2018 20:07

Meh. Just forget about it for and play along. Don't ruin it for him. You can resize it. There's always a solution.

Congratulations!

gingercat02 · 20/12/2018 20:14

A good jeweller will change it for one that fits not resize it. Congratulations OP 💍

ItIsChristmasTime · 20/12/2018 20:15

If it is that small, it probably can’t be resized which means you’ll either get a new one in the right size and swap it over or else the ring itself will have to be remade and the stone reset. Of you try to resize more than a size or two the stone is much more prone to coming out.

deepwatersolo · 20/12/2018 20:23

Are you saying you have only one finger, or are you saying Your pinky finger is just as big as your ring finger? Talk about first world problems...

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