Friend texts all day every day

[Mothership241]

For the past year or so one of my closest friends (long distance since I moved away) has taken to texting me every waking moment of the day, I'm talking about a running dialogue of her day from "good morning! How are you and DS today" up until the point she retires to bed at night time. We talk so often I rarely have much to say and it's getting quite tiresome.

I've started to respond less and more infrequently in attempts to cut down the volume of contact but feel bad because I think she's quite lonely.

How can I put across to her that the constant texting is too much and is quite draining?

Would you mind this level of contact?

Shes lovely and a dear friend but I find it very, very draining.

Sounds like a match made in heaven Dishing

Would drive me mad but you don't have to respond to every text. Save your response for once every couple or three days.

I admit to having offended a couple of people over emails, not texts; I said I hated being bombarded with emails about nothing. I wish now I had been less blunt and had just done what I suggested in my first paragraph. I honestly didn't want to hurt but believe in being straightforward, however there are ways of doing it.

I had a similar problem with a friend except they called and texted everyday constantly I tried to be nice and explain I can't do that and it was continuously ignored every call and text was a matter of life and death it got to the point where if I didn't respond they went on my social media and contacted other friends of mine asking if they had heard from me. I finally snapped after asking nicely to please not call me for one day so I could have a chilled out day off with no phone constantly going off and of course soon as I posted on social media they texted then called me so I ended up being very blunt and a bit harsh in anger and said some things I probably shouldn't have but I was so annoyed over the constant phone calling and texting and the constant "it's an emergency" excuse that I went nuclear so if I was you OP I would have that conversation with them ASAP and say how you feel and if they won't take your advice then I'm afraid it's cold turkey time of putting your phone on silence and saying you aren't free. Thankfully me and this friend after a long time of not talking over my nuclear reaction, we talked it out and made it up and we now keep our chats to once or twice a week and that means we have loads to talk about :)

it got that bad with my friend she was bombarding my husband aswell with texts asking why i am ignoring her? asking what is wrong what did she do to offend me? this is always when he is at work she does this to him.

There was many reasons building up to me exploding i actually had a thread about her months back when she kept coming to my door to use my wifi.

I struggle with this too. I do try and message most people back as soon as possible - and with most people it is no problem. A couple of messages every now and then. One friend though, I think she literally must be on Whatsapp to someone or other all day long. Just continuous communication. If I reply, it just escalates and leads to phone calls.

It is draining and come an evening I just want to chill. Constant buzz of a phone is quite stressful.

She does just sound seriously lonely and probably depressed. I had a friend like this that in the end I just blocked because I didn’t have enough hours in the day for it anymore. People forget how arduous a working day can be when they’ve been out of work for a while, they think everyone has all the hours in the day like they do.

I would mute the conversation or if worst comes to worst block her. She sounds difficult.

Set boundaries for how you expect to be treated. This includes contact. Send a message... “ I don’t want to be who you want me to be. I choose to be myself. I would be happy to speak to you once a fortnight/month for a catchup. The texting is too much. I like you but I don’t like the amount of contact. I hope you can understand.” If she’s offended, fine. If she decides she doesn’t want to be friends with you anymore, fine. You set your boundaries and stick to them. She sets her boundaries. Everyone knows where they stand. Life is to fucking short to be spent endlessly pleasing other people especially when those people are not your partner and children.

how is your "detox" working out op has she taken the hint yet?