Am I being picky or should the timings of a divorce matter?

[Lottie35]

Would greatly appreciate advice!

I found out tonight (I asked directly) that my BF of 3 months was only divorce 3 weeks before meeting me on a dating app. He led me to believe it was over 4 months.

He didn't see the divorce coming, he was madly in love with his wife and she only moved out 5 weeks before he got together with me..in the mean time he'd been on the dreaded tinder and dated other girls - fine but not exactly grieving.

I'm upset because he was economical with the truth but has turned it round on me saying time is irrelevant and why should i care. He also said that within the 5 weeks of his ex moving out and getting together we met he did all his grieving i just can't believe it??!

I've always felt he's been pushing for more ie seeing me more, wanting me to move in, he talks about marriage (he's been married twice before) and really pushing to meet my family. At times it's made me feel uncomfortable i feel like the rebound and crazy for thinking this way because he makes me feel like i'm being silly - am i?

I find him quite needy and insecure and now it makes sense. He refuses to say he is insecure even though he's made me feel slutty for having ex's (I've been single for 2 years to get over my ex) and loads of other little things. He won't admit to lying to me or admitting he has baggage from him recent divorce.
Am i being picky? paranoid? or am i being reasonable?

What the hell do I do?! I have zero confidence in relationships from a nasty ex in the past and paranoid I'll ruin a healthy relationship. He says he loves me so much but there is a nagging feeling it's more obsession and escapism for him. I feel like crap .

Yep I think he's a charmer and tells 'woman' what he thinks they want to hear - I mean we all want to get married right? We all want that male to show up and offer lifts??

He a loser - get rid

Lottie you’ve had a lucky escape here.

I’m REALLY sorry you’ve attracted these twats

You’ve clearly worked hard and come a long way since your divorce and you have other issues you’re coping with too, you’re doing great

However, I think you still need a bit of help to not attract these twats and to spot them even sooner. Also to understand your own feelings. You don’t know someone after 3 months, 12 weeks. You can be attracted to them and feel ‘in love’ but it’s hormones and stuff, it’s not real love. You cannot truly love someone you barely know.

No matter how much it hurts, trust YOURSELF here, it ‘didn’t feel right’ that’s because it wasn’t.

I doubt he's divorced. I've been separated 3 years and my divorce is still going through (albeit slowly as my ex is a wanker). No one I know has got divorced in 3 months.