Feeling so low about life after going NC with my parents.

[HappinessWhereAreYou]

In July, a number of things happened between me and my emotionally abusive mum that basically made me realise I couldn't put myself through this any longer. My dad, who has been manipulated by my mum for my whole life, is truly a lovely man. He's been there for me through thick and thin until now but he has now turned his back on me because I can't deal with my mum's abuse any more.

I'm finding that the more time that passes, the harder this is getting. To be rejected by him is absolutely killing me. I've tried reaching out to him but his replies are short, sharp and to the point. He doesn't want to converse with me anymore. It's like he's using me as a scapegoat and directing all of his pain and suffering towards me and blaming me for everything. The way he sees it is that we all know what my mums like and I should just be the bigger person but I just can't any more.

My husband is deployed with the army and he has been away since June. I've got 2 young children and I just feel so lonely. My parents would have been who I would lean on whilst my husband was away but I've lost that now.

I had friends visit this weekend. We all drank rather a lot and I ended up crying. Some of these girls are new friends so I'm absolutely mortified. I also ended up getting so drunk I was sick. I haven't been in that sort of mess for a long time and I'm absolutely mortified. I confessed to one of the girls that I used to suffer from bulimia (something I never tell anyone).

I'm absolutely mortified at the mess I got myself into and just feel like I'm not coping with this. Does anyone have any advice? I'm just so alone just now 😢

Also you don’t know what went on between your parents in private. Maybe he put on a nice face for you but was horrible to her in private - he might have had affairs or been abusive behind the scenes.
I think I’d be pretty bitter if my oh went away for months on end leaving me with no support.

Im going to go against the stream. I think your text is really nicely put and if you don't send it, you will never know if it might have done something.

The overwhelming likelihood is that you won't get the outcome you want but well, long shots do sometimes come off.

being pernickitty, I'd say take the last sentance out ("If you’ve got this far, thank you for reading it all") and might consider putting something in about there was more went on than he realised, but the rest is really lovely. If he has a heart at all he can't fail to be moved. Just be prepared for that worst scenario. But right now I don't think you have anything to lose

I hope that something breaks your way and the love your father does have for you triumphs over the lies of his wife, your mother.