What's normal contact after first date?

[datingloon]

Need some help in what's actually normal, past has been guys that are intense and text from morning till night.

Meet guy on tinder and we exchange messages for a week, not loads but one or two a day

We met Friday night and had great time, chemistry, laughed a lot and stayed in pub until we were kicked out at close and he offered to drive me home, once back at mine he asked if I would like to go out again, I said yes and we agreed to swap numbers on tinder, just friendly kiss on side of lips goodbye

He messaged on tinder around lunchtime on Saturday saying he had a good time giving me his number so I texted him a reply saying I enjoyed it to etc, we then exchanged 4 or 5 messages and left it with me saying " have a good evening" as he was out with friends last night.

Haven't heard anything at all today and not sure if I should read anything into it? On one hand I think he may text tomorrow or something to suggest 2nd date but then in the other think if he was interested I would get at least 1 message a day?

As I say I'm not really experienced in this dating as most men I know blow up my phone... and it always ends badly

Should I write him off as not interested just yet?

Delightful. I wouldn’t read into it. It’s obky been a day. He’s probably whimpering on the floor after a night out on the tiles. I’d relax. Perhaps message him Monday enquiring if he had a good time and his head wasn’t too sore.

Thanks I really struggle with what's the right thing to do all my friends insist you never text them first and don't chase them and if they are interested they would definitely contact you.

I personally wouldnt text again first if you sent the last text.

Wait for him to get in touch with you. If he doesn't after a few days, then get in touch but just send the one text.

I'm not sure if I will text him, figure if I don't hear anything within a few days then he isn't interested as guy will definitely go after what they are interested in

If he's interested in seeing you again, he will contact you

There’s a girl I like and we’ve been messaging each other daily. Casually I thought. Until, courtesy of this thread I thought I’d count them. I figured 20/30 texts? Turns out there’s like 150. Mutual. Isn’t one sided. So yeah. If he’s interested he’ll definitely be in touch. And on that note I think I need therapy. Texting far too much!!!

Thanks so you don't think it's strange at all not to have heard anything today?

As I say only 1 date so far but just trying to figure out what's normal contact as I've not experienced this before

No not strange. I think it's good actually. Before online dating people didn't speak every day after one date. Wait it out and let him miss you.

Well I'm rubbish with the unknown so I just texted wishing him a good week (last week was stressful at work for him) so will know either way if he responds

I don't think he needs to message every day at this stage. If he wasn't interested he wouldn't have initiated contact after the date and given you his number. You swapped numbers, had a chat, now just see what happens.

You want daily contact ? After ONE DATE ?! No. Chill out.

Everyone saying chill out BUT if this is causing you stress and worry and you don't know where you stand maybe you're not suited to him.
You deserve someone who you never have to second guess or worry about. Maybe a few dates down the line will help but if you're still uneasy about the lack.of convo there are guys out there who.will get you and reply x

I absolutely hate texting every day after one date.

“Morning gorgeous xx”
“Hi how was your day”
“Night sexy”

I hate it when I barely know someone. After one date you are essentially still strangers.

Sounds normal. If it were me I would text tomorrow to arrange 2nd date, assuming he hasn't got in contact since. It would have made more sense to have arranged it when you were exchanging texts- he initiated the conversation so is obviously interested.

Don’t text him anymore.

To be honest he’s had opportunities to arrange a second date and he hasn’t done it so I’d probably write this one off.

I won't text again! Just one text wishing him a good week this morning... he hasn't responded maybe he will later after work ( Work is bust for him) if he doesn't then I have my answer

Still don't get men at all after 40 years, why bother stringing date out until we were kicked out or bother asking to see me again and swapping numbers if not interested

I would think messaging every day was a bit OTT.

Im sure you had a nice time but a lot of men online dating are seeing or speaking to a few people, so he could be dating or speaking to someone else. See what happens but don't take it personally if he doesn't come back to you. On Tinder a lot of the people are only on there for one reason.

Dating you've already sent one text he didn't respond to and now you've sent another. It's been one date. one. You are being too invested in this man. Sending these two texts with no replies says a lot already. He's not too busy to reply. If he was really keen he would be contacting you .

Still don't get men at all after 40 years, why bother stringing date out until we were kicked out or bother asking to see me again and swapping numbers if not interested

Is it possible you still don't get us because you've never bothered to ask?

You had a date on Friday. You both enjoyed it.

He probably got shitfaced on Saturday. You had a text conversation together.

Sunday he was unconscious.

Monday is first day back at work.

After one date? On tinder? I'd expect a message tonight maybe.

But if it's seriously bugging you then just ask next time. We're not complex creatures. Within 48 hours ask: "Do you want to go on another date? Really enjoyed the last one. Let me know if you're free. xx" and then if he doesn't reply after about 2 days he's not bothered. Bin it off and try again.

all my friends insist you never text them first and don't chase them and if they are interested they would definitely contact you.

And if the mens friends said the same then noone would ever contact anyone and loads of people would be sat alone liking each other and neither of them texting.

Hope he replies to you OP.

Klutzy men usually do text if they are interested** though.

True Milly but what's stopping women texting if they're interested?

I've been on lots of dates, somewhere entire well, some didn't. If a woman texted me after one and said she enjoyed it and wants to do it gain, I'd be delighted.

Seems there's some weird social conditioning that says women don't text and instead just worry, or post on Mumsnet. It's odd, just text him if you want to.

But why do you have to write him off? Why can't you just be patient and let things take their natural flow? He either will text you back, or he won't. Think why you are so invested so early on.

Also a tip - don't text unnecessary stuff that people cannot respond to. Be brave and ask him for a second date, or don't text. This halfway texts of have a nice week are not easy to reply to in any case. What can he say? "you too"?