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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

So excited but no one to share it with

32 replies

Canthisreallybe · 08/11/2018 10:25

I'm desperate to tell someone so you, lovely mentors are it. I"ve nc btw because I want to be sure before I say anything to family.

Bit of background - I was married for ever, since I was a very young teenager. About 25 yrs ago H decided he didn't love me anymore, he didn't share this with me he just started being cold, uncaring and even more moody. If I asked what was wrong he just snapped so it became the norm to carry on with this.

I started to suffer with various health conditions that were really debilitating but never connected it to my situation - life just became a miserable drudge.

I'm 72 now and 2 years ago I reached my final straw, it was something quite minor in the scheme of things that tipped me over the edge and I found myself saying I want a divorce. And so we divorced, H moved out and I rattled round the house on my own. I went through some very dark times wondering if it was worth it.

So to cut to the chase, I've met someone on OLD and I can't believe how excited and happy its made me - we get on so well. We chat online for ages. It's early days yet and I've still got my feet on the ground - just about. I'm going to savour this as long as it lasts.

So lovely netters who have kept me sane, helped me laugh in the dark lonely times, educated me on the perils and successes of OLD - wish me luck.

OP posts:
Forgotmycoat · 08/11/2018 10:29

Awwww op. So Happy for you you've met someone nice. Congrats on getting out of that unhappy relationship. You go!!!!

AlohaFi · 08/11/2018 10:29

Aww I love these stories, good luck!

Villagelifer · 08/11/2018 10:31

Happy for you and wishing you luck Flowers

EmmaGeddon · 08/11/2018 10:34

Oh that's lovely. Wishing you all the luck in the world.

Prettyvase · 08/11/2018 10:39

Very happy for you!

Don't want to burst your bubble op but please be aware that you are going to be hot property for an asset less male of every kind and age.

Don't be like the hordes of wonderful, asset rich ladies who get taken in by those who are actually eyeing up their potential new partner's wealth whie professing undying love.

Does he have a good job/property?

Is he married/divorced can you check and do a google search?

Any convictions? Does he slag off any ex?

Look out for red flags while you receive red roses Grin

Good luck and stay safe Flowers

Trinity66 · 08/11/2018 10:39

aw congrats OP

letsdolunch321 · 08/11/2018 10:45

Lovely news

Canthisreallybe · 08/11/2018 11:25

Thanks for the warning Prettyvase I don't have anything to pinch - I'm in rented. Smile But I know it's easy to be taken in and I can be a bit naive.
He's a bit younger than me and still working - his house is similar to mine, don't know if he owns it or rents - haven't got to that stage yet.
But would think he's better off than me on paper.
No slagging off the ex - says he had many happy years with her.

Will update this thread as I go along and let you know if it goes pear shaped or not.
Thankyou for lovely replies

OP posts:
BundyLancroft · 08/11/2018 12:08

How lovely OP. best of luck to you

Prawnofthepatriarchy · 08/11/2018 12:17

Lovely to hear this. Good luck! Flowers

hellsbellsmelons · 08/11/2018 12:46

Yeah! So pleased for you.
You sound lovely and deserve some happiness.
YOU GO GIRL!? Grin

userxx · 08/11/2018 13:05

Lovely!!!! Enjoy those warm fuzzy feelings, we are a long time dead.

bobstersmum · 08/11/2018 13:23

Good luck op, lovely to read

MrsCar · 08/11/2018 13:30

Sorry if I'm being an idiot OP, but it's not very clear from your OP, have you met him yet, or have you just been chatting online?

Reason I say that is years ago, I spent 2 or 3 months intimately chatting to someone online and thought I was in love with him Blush We had exchanged pictures etc, but the second we met, my head sank and I was so disappointed, there was nothing between us and he wasn't at all what I had thought he was.
I think I was just at a low and vulnerable time.

Again, sorry if I've misunderstood your post, I'm sure you're not a fool.
I'm sure your story will inspire lots of women who read it 💪

MixedMaritalArts · 08/11/2018 13:38

Every good wish for you moving forwards.

Heartofglass12345 · 08/11/2018 13:52

Yay! So happy for you 

Canthisreallybe · 08/11/2018 15:20

Mrscar Oh what a let down.
I haven't met him yet but if it's a let down too
I think we would both go back to just enjoying the
connection we have online.

I don't think it's going to be grand passion but somebody
who 'gets me' and is kind is more than I expected and I'll settle for that
very happily.

Thanks for kind replies.

OP posts:
yearofreckoning · 08/11/2018 15:20

That's a lovely thing to read . Better late than never .All the best OP

TheQueef · 08/11/2018 15:23

Have at it lass and enjoy every second. Wine

Wideeyedandlegless · 08/11/2018 15:24

So lovely to read this. There is hope for me yet!

Wishing you well OP x

Storm4star · 08/11/2018 15:28

What a wonderful post to read, this has really made me smile. Good for you OP. I hope it all goes well for you Flowers

ILoveAutum · 08/11/2018 15:43

Oooh lovely 😊💕

I can’t wait until you reveal your usual posting name as I’d like to be excited for the ‘you’ I know as well as well!

It’s nice to have all those nice feelings, even if it doesn’t work out in the long run. Years ago now I was seeing someone, we both knew it wasn’t going to end up being ‘forever’ and both knew it probably wasn’t wise (only because we’d get hurt, we were both single), but we were good together, good for each other and he really restored my faith in men, myself & life in general. It was hard breaking up with him, but I don’t regret a second of the time we spent together.

Enjoy every second of it x

ILoveAutum · 08/11/2018 20:47

I think i killed your thread 😳

Sally2791 · 08/11/2018 20:54

How wonderful! I'm sure you can look after yourself and not be taken in so enjoy this late loveliness

Angelkd · 08/11/2018 20:54

Aww good luck, online friendships do work you get to know the person so well.its the way to meet people nowadays x

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