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Relationships

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The difference between an EA and a friendship?

26 replies

Wouldyouorshouldyou · 04/11/2018 08:40

What's the difference? I'm married but becoming really good friends with a male colleague. We enjoy each others company, similar humour, similar likes and dislikes.

My marriage is stable. A little bit dull but then it's been a very long time and day to day life isn't exciting. I'm not looking for anything else, feel content and happy where I am. We do flirt from time to time in a humourous way but only as part of office banter. Now this is not something I would do with a female colleague. Which is part of my wondering where the line is.

He is in a similar position, we both love our partners. He has eyes for nobody else other than his dw and he is a fully hands on dad. He's a good family man. We talk about everything including our relationships, kids and we are very open with each other and yes we discuss our day to day frustrations with our spouses. No physical contact but we are very comfortable with each other and we enjoy each others company.

My DH knows, we message each other from time to time and I feel like I have nothing to hide. Rumors at work are (typically) starting up because he's a man and I'm a woman and we get on. We laugh it off, make it known we know and yes we do play on it.

On Friday I was making some drinks, he walked in to make some for his colleagues and he was closely followed by one of our other colleagues who had previously commented to him that we seemed to "get on well" and he jokingly and loudly said to me in a dramatic voice "you must control yourself, I know I'm a catch but I'm a married man". Other colleague rolled her eyes and laughed at him.

This got me wondering because he's a man would this be considered an emotional affair?

OP posts:
MandalaYogaTapestry · 04/11/2018 11:45

jewel - yes, more so than if confiding in a female friend.

And OP's friend is acting like a distinctly male one by joking about him being a catch but married, and they do flirt.

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