Ok touchy subject. Does it bother anyone else knowing dh has a tom tank

[holsnovell]

God that sounds awful. But being 26weeks pg i'm completely off sex, but the thought of dh having a you know what upsets me. To the point where i want to cry when i look at him

oh,
so not a tank top then?
he says he doesnt..

In answer to the OP. Absolutely doesn't bother me at all. Can't understand why it would bother anyone to be honest.

It doesn't bother me [as long as he doesn't use porn] but I guess it might some people.

Message withdrawn

This has kept cropping up in active conversations so in the end I decided to find out what a tom tank was.

What sprang to mind was

a) some kind of military vehicle
b) some kind of specialist vessel for fish
c) something for the garden
d) something else men have that I don't know about but might be offended by

I'm a bit disappointed it's something as normal as wanking.

Just my hormones. It wouldn't norm but like someone said i'd be really hurt if it was with porn

You are normal!

All men wank though...prob why all men are wankers!

lol!!

Intriguing title! dh used to have one every morning when we first got together, and that did irritate/upset me (plus I hate being woken up in the morning). I think that's because he was then at his sexual peak, and I hadn't really got going (we were 19). Now we're probably the other way around (mid 30's) and much more relaxed about it. I also went off sex during pregnacy/breastfeeding (I just found it uncomfortable/too much hassle). It caused us lots of problems, so I recommend that you talk about it and find something that works for both of you. Of course it might not be an issue for you and your dh, but mine felt very rejected because I wasn't keen on cuddles etc either, because it seemed that they alsways turned into sexual advances, which I really didn't want.

Lol. True.

Yes LL but I thought it might be some kind of mini-one, that fits in his garden shed or something

Thanks nooka i'm the same with hugs etc at mo. I think dh does feel rejected sometimes

Don't have this problem any more (no partner but he was tosser in every sense of the word)

But it never bothered me if he did, but he didn't like me to, unless he got to watch

Weird, touch of role reversal. He hated my BOB and would sabotage it by taking batteries out and hiding them lol

Masturbation is something to do for a bit of release and sometimes relieves boredom, I don't think it's a sexual act per se

I feel a bit sorry for men, making love, they have so much pressure in performance and as it can be harder to pleasure a woman, they have to put more effort in. Jacking off is purely selfish self pleasuring, no pressure, no worrying about anyone else and quick!

I'm maybe going off the thread a bit here so sorry, but I'm interested in your opinions. I don't have a problem in my dh having a tom tank, same as he doesn't mind me although I wouldn't particularly want to watch him!! (I also didn't know what a tom tank was till I read the rest of the posts!!)
My problem is that i whilst I don't mind him looking at mags or films, we sometimes do that together and it's fun, I went totally ballistic at him when he looked at it over the internet, it was normal stuff, nothing awful, but i hated the fact he'd done that to the extent i tried to throw the computer down the stairs. (PMT maybe!) He couldn't see why i was so upset, but he promised he wouldn't do it again and thats that. But i know he can't understand how i can differentiate and the only way i can explain is that I'm frightened of something horrible popping up on screen, something uninvited. is it me!!!!

its an activity of daily living - your man has needs too...it is a natural expression of adult male sexuality.

not a reflection upon your relationship or pregnancy - regular and healthy male thing to do

only a problem when its demonised or portrayed as dirty/wrong/debased..as all these incorrect attributions attribute guilt unnecessarily

hey have you ever went phwoar at a man or movie star..harmless fun really

all men have a ham shank - no big deal

As long as he's discreet and doesn't do it when you have friends round for dinner or anything, I don't see the problem.

Its been interesting seeing everyone's views as i don't think i'd ask mates. Maybe the tom tank is southern thing? Lol. Maybe i should have said choking the vicar!

Yes I'd say it's southern seeing as it's cockney ryhming slang.. and London is in the south...

Weeble what has poor Tomk Hanks got to do with this??!

Oh and don't believe them people, re porn, when they say they won't look at it again.. they are lying!