Losing sleep, who was wrong?

[thebestnamesweretaken]

Met back up with ex "more than friend, less than lover" After 13 years, was like we had never been apart 2 great months later, went for a drive showed him some sights ( I had moved) ended up nice country pub for Sunday lunch, was chocka but staff fit us and in, ever so courteous.
I paid £48 on my card (on top of £28 curry night before, same guy)
I suggested since I'm a card tart and rarely carry cash would he mind tipping, he had a pocket full of change!
Cue causing a scene and huffing and puffing and myself feeling mortified for suggesting it!
Having worked in most sectors of the service industry I realise the importance of tips. Manager offered him his £2 back to placate the situation (I died inside)
So called bf stropped out i followed because my house keys were in his car, I grabbed them he said something derogatory to me and promptly drove off.
Leaving me £18 miles from home 😫
Then cost me £34 home.

I'm just out of hospital and can't work at present 3,500 overdrawn

He has own business and £40.000+ saved for own home deposit
Rents work unit for pennies and lives at home rent free!

My logic says mountain out of molehill he will be in touch, so I can tell him what a bell end he acted, NOTHING at all
He doesn't even know how I got home!

I won't contact him because I genuinely feel he was in the wrong!
In more than one way.

Thoughts please
Driving myself mad and sad that it's come to this and I've effectively been dumped since he drove away and left me realing

Never a cross word before this!

I can’t think why on earth you paid for the curry or lunch in the first place. No wonder you’re £3.5k overdrawn.

Some people are just tight as fuck.
Like you I am a tipper. I would cringe to leave an establishment without leaving a tip. But i think that's down to my cheffing career and knowing the restaurant trade and how helpful the tips can be.
My partner however HATES tipping. If we go out I'll have to have a fiver ready in my hand and make sure he's already got up and walked away from the table before I can sling it down without him seeing. He caught me once stormed back picked up the fiver and said I was an idiot for leaving it.
I cringed massively knowing that we were leaving and the service was so lovely yet the waiter wouldn't find a tip when he cleared the table.
Cue massive argument between us, me calling him a tight bastard, him calling me a spendthrift.
I don't think either of you were wrong regarding the tip situation because people genuinely do have different opinions on that no matter how much or how little money they have.
But for leaving you so far from home alone, he sounds like an absolute wanker and if I were you I would not contact him again. Ever.
He clearly had no conscience about it neither for the fact he hasn't tried to get in touch with you since.

Consider yourself well rid at this early stage and move on.

I'm only so massively overdrawn because I have an ongoing spinal problem and tried to hold on to the house, and not because I'm free n easy with my money I used to work 60-70 hours a week
Moreover I'm 5 days out of hospital and a ride out and a bit of nice food didn't seem too much to ask for! 😒

You dodged a bullet there.

He was. And ungracious. Buck up, you are well rid. Always a shame to be disappointed after you've invested something of yourself/time/hopes/money in something, but thank goodness you see what a loser he is now and can cut your losses.

He’s awful. Don’t message him.

He is a loser. That's it really.

On the money front, unfortunatly, if you are in the shit financially £70 odd pounds on meals is too much to ask for. I know, I am a single parent.

Try to put this out of your mind and don't put yourself in the situation of always picking up the tab.

There must have been a reason he was an EX in the first place.

This behaviour, regardless of whatever happened in the Lyn, is wrong just so wrong. A gentleman, a nice guy, a fe ent guy - should NEVER just abandon you and leave you stranded.

Never, ever, ever go out with this guy again. Block him on everything and move on.

He's completely wrong
At least you know he's an ex for a reason now.

Some people have money because they are very good at not spending it! Even if he gets in touch, nothing you say will make a difference, he's not going to stop being self centered for the sake of a rant and any apology you get won't stop him doing something similar again. Consider yoursef well rid of him.

No matter how much you disagree you don't leave someone you like 18 miles from home. Especially after they've just left hospital! He sounds abusive.

Don’t ever contact this tight selfish twat again.

Of course he was in the wrong! What a git! you’re well shot of him. No contact would be best.

But in your financial circumstances you can’t afford to treat others to trips or eating out. It’d be better, going forward, to be honest about this with people you date before making plans.

No way are you in the wrong. Not only is he a rude, unreasonable, tight twat, he left you stranded ffs. Keep him as an ex this time and get well soon

Why were you paying anyway? Did he offer?

This man is awful, and he showed his true colours. Why did he not pay half for the curry night or the pub lunch? Or offer to pay for one or the other?

And to make a fuss about paying a tip when he had got his lunch for free?!?!
Sounds like he was just using you.

Don't ever contact him again, and if he contacts your ignore him.

So wait, he gets two meals bought for him, yet huffily abandons a post op person on being asked to contribute less than a fiver?
He sounds horrendous op, you are well shot of him. Unreasonable doesn’t cover it.
The behaviour was so unexpected and I think you’re a bit in shock.

What you losing sleep over?

It cost you £100 to learn this valuable lesson.

And sleep well knowing you made the right choice. Never get with a man who talks to waiting staff like shit or who doesn't tip.

Putting aside the tip issue, who the fuck leaves a person just out of hospital, with spinal issues, alone 18 miles from home and then doesn't even bother to check if they're okay?

What a shit!

My logic says mountain out of molehill he will be in touch

I think actually you're kind of making a molehill out of a mountain, ie: you are massively minimising how bad his behaviour had been.

A) he knows you are a single parent, and yet still thinks you ought to pick up the tab for taking him out and feeding him.

B) when you ask him to contribute, he throws a wobbler

C) he is unkind to serving staff

D) he fucking ABANDONED you

E) he is now giving you the silent treatment.

He is awful, OP, just a nasty, selfish, childish entitled prick. You aren't going to keep seeing him, right?

Why did you pay?

Can't believe you even feel.you need to ask - million % him!!!

Wise answers women, I wouldn't carry on like that with my worst enemy,
I know there's no going back and can't comprehend his behaviour

£100 ( 2 meals, 2 times and taxi from being left ) odd is a bonus to be well rid of the Jekyll.
The bill came and he starts looking around and shifting his weight!

He has taken my kindness for weakness,
You guys raise some valid points i had overlooked,

I hope his money keeps him warm at night.
And certainly at 39 living with his mom he'd have more manners

Ladies I am as stubborn as a mule, I have not and will not message or Await a message from him on any platform I'd rather drop my crappy phone in Canal or damage my own digits! X

Ew, for your sake I hope that's the last you hear of him he sounds like an awful person