Losing sleep, who was wrong?

[thebestnamesweretaken]

Met back up with ex "more than friend, less than lover" After 13 years, was like we had never been apart 2 great months later, went for a drive showed him some sights ( I had moved) ended up nice country pub for Sunday lunch, was chocka but staff fit us and in, ever so courteous.
I paid £48 on my card (on top of £28 curry night before, same guy)
I suggested since I'm a card tart and rarely carry cash would he mind tipping, he had a pocket full of change!
Cue causing a scene and huffing and puffing and myself feeling mortified for suggesting it!
Having worked in most sectors of the service industry I realise the importance of tips. Manager offered him his £2 back to placate the situation (I died inside)
So called bf stropped out i followed because my house keys were in his car, I grabbed them he said something derogatory to me and promptly drove off.
Leaving me £18 miles from home 😫
Then cost me £34 home.

I'm just out of hospital and can't work at present 3,500 overdrawn

He has own business and £40.000+ saved for own home deposit
Rents work unit for pennies and lives at home rent free!

My logic says mountain out of molehill he will be in touch, so I can tell him what a bell end he acted, NOTHING at all
He doesn't even know how I got home!

I won't contact him because I genuinely feel he was in the wrong!
In more than one way.

Thoughts please
Driving myself mad and sad that it's come to this and I've effectively been dumped since he drove away and left me realing

Never a cross word before this!

When the bill came and he started shifting his weight, what happened then? Did you not ask how the bill was to be split? Or did you just get your card out and pay in silence?
I dont understand how you didnt say anything when the bill came?

I would bill him for £50.

In what way could you have been wrong about anything in this scenario?

Do you mean "was it a mistake to pay for him?" - I guess so, in retrospect, but you weren't to know he was a dick.

Who was in the wrong, are you actually serious, wise up OP, he's a user, he let you pay for two meals then had a strop when you asked him to tip, unbelievable, he then goes on to leave you stranded and you then have to fork out another £34 to get home and to top it off, he's now blanked you.

Learn from it, sleep very well knowing you can now dodge a very unkind nasty piece of shit.

Think of it as a lucky escape, he's shown his true colours.

Well yeah when the bill came I thought I may as well roll this up and smoke it!
It hit me hard to think wow he thinks I'm paying for this automatically.
He did buy a round when we went in, which is no less than most men do, only cost £6.50
What's he want me to drink tap water!
Knob will never hear from me again!

I've had a man who treated me like a princess but had to move across the globe for work, so I know good men exist, I shall wait and see what hand I'm dealt next in my love life!
No rush, it's all life lessons x

Why are you even doubting who was in the wrong here?

The only thing you should do differently is learn be more assertive from the very first date that things are to be split 50/50. I went on a first date recently that cost me £30 (two coffees, then two lunches and two soft drinks, oh not including the hour drive and parking; he had walked in) and he gave me a sodding fiver towards it. I was too gobsmacked at the barefaced cheek and the fact that it seemed accidental to say anything, but my god if I'd have seen him again I simply wouldn't have got my purse out the second time.

Thank crunchie your dude couldn't hide his true colours for longer. I'm sorry you went through that, but certainly don't loose sight of the fact that he was a total arse, and you did nothing wrong. Even if you're "just not a tipper" it's possible to politely say exactly that, while handing over half of the price of the bill to the person who just paid - anything else and it's just not fair unless you've offered to pay for both. It's certainly not fair to storm off leaving you stranded.

And obviously, with normal reasonable people, if one got the bill it's the very least the other can do to get the tip.

Blimey I would NOT be choosing to spend any more of my time with this charmer

What a knob! You're well rid OP

Wow, so you were meant to pay for all his meals and tip as well. I'm actually astounded at how tight he is.

Sleep well knowing you will never spend another penny on him or look back longingly with 'what if'.

I think you are both wrong.

Yes he’s tighter then a knats arse. And always will be.

You whip your card like it’s a toy and not real money. You need to seriously rethink your spending habits otherwise you are going to have more debt then you want

Meal and Taxis: £100
Price of realising your well worth of the jerk: priceless

You do need to think about your boundaries going forward tho. Why did you offer to pay for both meals? Why at least not say so we just splitting this in half? You can't actually afford to be that generous op

What sleeping said