What is this phone number??

[ConfusedNeedSomeHelp]

Hello all. I'm new to mumsnet although I wish I had been on it a few months previously as I would be wise to all the crap men come out with.
This all started a few months back when my DH got a text saying 'I can do friday x' I saw it come in and he deleted it. He NEVER deletes texts so although I had absolutely no prior reason to be suspicious, I certainly was then. I looked at his bill and there were 2 texts the same day to A number I didn't recognise. Googled it and it was a prostitute. I went nuts and threw him out. Anyway he somehow convinced me he never intended to go through with it ( I know I'm stupid, and I now know after reading mumsnet they all say this).
I looked at the bill again and compared his phone to the texts. They were all there apart from one other number 2 days before the prositute text. He text it once and called it the same day. I called it and it was an Indian man so I thought no more of it.
A couple of months ago his WhatsApp use was crazy the day before I was due to go out for the day with friends so I stupidly confronted him again and he denied doing anything
Then yesterday his WhatsApp rang once and hung up. He said oh it was some Indian bloke I don't know. It reminded me of the call I made to the Indian man so I've just compared his number with the phone bill from months ago and it's the same number.
I don't know what to think. Could it be a pimp? Although the escort he contacted advertises herself and has her own website . I'm so confused, has anyone got any ideas. (I know I should kick him out as the trust is gone, but this has already driven me mad for months) thank you.

This mans number and the escort number are the only ones he's deleted in a year.

Why are you putting yourself through this? Leave him, and get yourself checked out for STDs.

I don't know if he was telling the truth. There were only 2 texts to her and nothing else. I'm just so confused with this other number. I know what I should do. I just want to get to the bottom of it for my own sanity.

You'll never get to the bottom if it OP, he knows you know now so he'll be extra careful to make sure he leaves no tracks for you to follow. Your H is the kind of man that buys women for sex. Saying he was never going to go through with it is a steaming pile of BS and you know it. I expect he's done it before but just hasn't been caught out. How do you know these are the only messages he's deleted? if he's deleted them and you weren't there to see him do it you would never know. Do yourself a favour, get your ducks in a row and kick his ass to the kerb. And get yourself checked for STD's.

I looked through his bill and typed all the numbers into his phone. They all came up with a text he had sent to the numbers apart from these 2. I know I'm mad and will get told to leave him but I need to find out if it's connected.

Honestly OP I know you probably don't want to face it but he's using escorts, plain and simple, you have the evidence, end your torture and get rid, he's paying for sex with family money and giving you a load of bull; please stop this joke of a marriage because you are basically supporting his prostitution habit as well as putting yourself at risk of a sexually transmitted disease, there's no way on this earth you are going to come back from this, sorry, it's dead in the water.

It will probably get to that point as I can't rust him anymore. But I have have this unstoppable need to know what is going on. Does anyone have experience of escorts, or is an escort? Would someone who advertises herself also use a man to speak to clients. I've googled his number but there's nothing.

Totally understand that OP but sadly it's highly unlikely, he knows you are already on to him, other than spyware on his laptop not sure what you could try?

I'd simply be going on the first instance, he was arranging to visit an escort, to me, that's it, game over.

The trust is gone, you are never going to fully trust him again now, you'd be better off getting rid and finding a man without this horrible sordid suspicion in your head, it won't ever go. Poor you but you deserve much better than this, much!

It might be linked, it might be another contact but I don’t think it matters. You know he contacted a prostitute to arrange to meet and you don’t believe his pathetic excuses.

How much more proof do you want? He's been fucking prostitutes, obviously. Do you actually need to see his dick going in before you believe it or something?! Kick his disgusting, cheating arse out. And get an std check asap.

The majority of you are going to get frustrated with me and I'm really sorry.
This will probably end up finishing us. But I need to know, I want to catch him.

You won't catch him now, you may catch him in the future if he slips up but what if he doesn't; he's clearly used them and no offence but probably still is, why don't you speak to a private detective at least that way your torture will be over quicker, worth every penny I'd say, imagine the money he's spending on his escorts.

I don't think he is still using them. Not at the moment anyway. He is always where he's said he's going to be. I guess I'm just cross at myself for showing my hand and blowing it, and I'm trying to find some retrospective proof. As soon as I started reading mumsnet I realised what an idiot I was. It's kind of all settled down and he thinks I've forgiven him, but I want to know who this bloody man is and if he's connected.

The man is the leas your worries; I'd imagine if he can use escorts he may be on online sex forums etc as well; I'd definitely go speak to a PD to see what they say; they may be able to access his old messages from his mobile etc; there are clever tricks they know about that we don't.

How on earth do you forgive someone that has used a prostitute, genuine question, don't get it.

Because I've convinced myself he hasn't. I think the lovely husband and dad he is can't have done that to me.
But I bet they are all lovely husbands and dads. I can't hire a PI as we have joint money, no way I could pay for it.

Confused - sorry, but I think you are still holding onto it being something innocent/ misunderstanding. You are sounding a little desperate to stay in the relationship. Look at what you are doing - googling, asking on mumsnet, trying to "catch" him. It's irrelevant. He's a wrong un and catching him wont help you. In fact it will make u worse as u will then try to work out why he did x,y or z. Just leave now with your head held high and move on with your life.

Jesus woman, listen to yourself; he must be laughing at you behind your back, no offence but I am just agog that you can't spend money on a PD but it's ok for him to have used money for escorts, wow.

How can you not pay for it, you have no idea what they will quote you.

Sounds like you have convinced yourself there's nothing to see here, I wish you luck but I'm afraid there's every chance he is still using escorts, why would he not, he's been getting away with it!

And btw, you are seeing things from your POV, you would never do that, remember he did so you can't possibly know what the fuck is going on at all.

My "salt of the earth" lovely man has left me for OW after 23 years. It can happen to anyone. But trying to sort it rationally is pointless. He will never explain, never be truthful and fuck with your head. Trust me - I know!!

Why don't your ring the number and ask who it is? If you think it's going to finish you anyways then you have nothing to lose really do you. I would just say you keep calling my phone and give your husbands number. I can understand you wanting to get to the bottom of it xx

Ok thanks everyone for replying to me, and you all make a good point. I was hoping for someone to tell me how it all works, where to look etc. I won't take up any more of your time. Shortest ever mumsnet account in history!

What more do you need. He is using prostitutes...even if you catch him he will blame you for not giving him what he needs....ie boring in bed..blah blah blah!

Get a man to call up, don't delete this, you will get more help if you leave it here.

My “reliable and hard working “ husband who my family, friends and neighbours all thought the world of had been shagging prostitutes for 25 years. I had had a few suspicions over recent years but he gaslighted me and convinced me I was being paranoid. Turns out my gut feelings were correct. I wish I’d hired a PI and saved myself years of anguish.

As pp said if he can splash out on an escort you can treat yourself to a pi.

If finances are joint why does that mean you don't have access to money? Does he have access to money that you don't? If he's paying escorts I suspect he's not doing it out of the joint account.

Get a pi to quote and get cash back with the weekly shop if you need to save up. A pi will be the fastest and most accurate way of discovering the truth if you really want to know what he gets up to.

What everyone said.
To answer your question, though: have you typed the number into the Facebook search bar? If it's a personal number, it might be connected to a Facebook page or maybe even a business page.
If not, ring it and ask questions. Nothing to lose.
Sorry you're dealing with this shit.