What is this phone number??

[ConfusedNeedSomeHelp]

Hello all. I'm new to mumsnet although I wish I had been on it a few months previously as I would be wise to all the crap men come out with.
This all started a few months back when my DH got a text saying 'I can do friday x' I saw it come in and he deleted it. He NEVER deletes texts so although I had absolutely no prior reason to be suspicious, I certainly was then. I looked at his bill and there were 2 texts the same day to A number I didn't recognise. Googled it and it was a prostitute. I went nuts and threw him out. Anyway he somehow convinced me he never intended to go through with it ( I know I'm stupid, and I now know after reading mumsnet they all say this).
I looked at the bill again and compared his phone to the texts. They were all there apart from one other number 2 days before the prositute text. He text it once and called it the same day. I called it and it was an Indian man so I thought no more of it.
A couple of months ago his WhatsApp use was crazy the day before I was due to go out for the day with friends so I stupidly confronted him again and he denied doing anything
Then yesterday his WhatsApp rang once and hung up. He said oh it was some Indian bloke I don't know. It reminded me of the call I made to the Indian man so I've just compared his number with the phone bill from months ago and it's the same number.
I don't know what to think. Could it be a pimp? Although the escort he contacted advertises herself and has her own website . I'm so confused, has anyone got any ideas. (I know I should kick him out as the trust is gone, but this has already driven me mad for months) thank you.

The only thing you are going to "catch" is the clap

Give it up, love.

What do you reckon are the chances that the time you catch him messaging prostitutes is the first time he has done it ? No matter what shit sandwich he gets you to swallow

Find your self respect and get away from the john

Google the number as use the " on either side of it. If it's on the internet anywhere it should come up.

*and use the

Honestly you're getting hung up on details and grasping at straws. The PI is a waste of money. The bottom line is your H has been contacting prostitutes. You're torturing yourself to try to find a scrap of evidence that it may have been innocent but it can't be innocent.

Your husband is a sleaze who contacted a prostitute, presumably intending to spend your family money on it. The fact that he didn't go through with it (if indeed this is the case) is an irrelevance.

There is no worse blind man (woman) than the one who doesn’t want to see.

You have caught him OP. What more proof do you want? Video evidence?

Why don't you respect yourself enough to get away from a man who doesn't respect women?

I am genuinely baffled why you are making excuses.

Baffled as to why people are suggesting private investigators when the OP already has enough proof her husbands a sleaze. Why waste all that extra time and money?

OP, I mean this kindly, but men don’t contact prostitutes to play a game of scrabble with them. Of course he was contacting her to have sex with her.

I understand why you need definitive proof. I honestly get that. And it’s easy for us posters to write on here urging you to leave him this instant etc. But you have enough proof. You’re clinging on to the tiniest bit of hope that he’s innocent.

Even if these two numbers are completely innocent and not related to any sex work what so ever - look at all this torture. Look what he’s done to you, your marriage and your mental health. You cannot live the rest of your life like this you’ll drive yourself insane when all the while everything stays the same for him and he’s not had to suffer at all.

I don’t have much advice. But you deserve better. He’s full of lies.

I don't think she needs a PI (I wouldn't) but she seems to want absolute proof of him cheating and she'll never get that by herself unless he confesses. I was also rather taken by OP's instant dismissal of a PI due to not having access to money. Either there's something amiss with how she gets to access family money or she dismissed the PI suggestion out of hand because really, deep down, she doesn't want to see any evidence because what she actually wants is proof he isn't a cheat iyswim.

I want to catch him

Why? What’s the reasoning here?

Seems you can't just delete a mumsnet post like a Facebook post. So I'll carry on as you e all been kind enough to comment.
I've tried the tips suggested but not getting anything. I don't have any men I can ask to phone it. I can't hire a PI as i the only money I have is through our joint account. I can spend what I like but he will see if I've taken a large lump of cash or written a cheque.
I'm not grasping at straws that this is innocent. It's looking very likely that it's not and I want proof. Basically where I'm at is - if his version of events are right, ie he got drunk that night, watched porn, messaged a hooker, and was horrified and scared in the morning then I would be inclined to try and get over it. I know a lot wouldn't but that's not what I'm trying to find out.
If he's been using these women then it over. But I want proof.
If anyone has other ideas what I can try, or there is a man who could call it, I can pm the number. I know I sound pathetic but I just need to know so I can tell him I fucking know he's been lying to me all these months.

He's been lying to you all these months

Confused - I understand that you feel you need to know and in the scenario you are hoping for, it was a silly drunken mistake, you can forgive, he will make it up to you and things will be fine. Only they won't be fine. He will know he got away with it and that he can do it again. He's at the very least seeking thrills outside of the relationship. Why does he do that? Because he wants to - that's basically it. No way will this be a one off.

Also, you have cross referenced all the calls and texts on his phone bill. However, am I correct in saying WhatsApp, iMessage and Facebook calls and messages wouldn’t show up on his bill?

Is this how you want to spend your life?

The trust is gone.

You'll always be wondering. Checking his phone. He'll make you feel guilty for checking on him even though it's his behaviour that is making you do so. You'll always wonder where he is. Who he's with. If you're going to catch something from him.

Leave.

The healthy relationship has already ended. You are just riding the waves of a broken relationship.

My thoughts are a drug dealer? Can't see why else he'd keep it secret unless he's gay which seems unlikely.

Also, how do you even randomly message a hooker out of the blue whilst drunk? Wouldn’t happen without some form of research surely?
I’m sitting at my kitchen table, sober, and wouldn’t have a clue how to contact a hooker for the first time. I certainly wouldn’t have her number handy to just send her a wee message.
There is some settings on iPhone where you can track “popular places”. Would this help you OP? If so, maybe a techie person can tell you how to access that feature.

Also I'll ring it if you want - just PM.

How can you trust him again? He's been lying to you for months. Don't waste anymore time

Anyfucker
My heroine!

I'll go left field here and say the other number is probably a dealer if it was on a night out. In which case it will be a burner phone, probably discarded already.

You could try texting "sniff?" to the number. (This means, in user parlance, "Do you have any cocaine available")

Ok, I actually do really understand where you are coming from. I’ve been there too. Believe me, it’s not going to work. There is no certain proof either way. You need to throw him out so you both know you are serious. Maybe you can make it work but for the meantime you need some space.