Online dating small rant indulgence please

[Mumteedum]

Oh ffs! I despair. You wade through endless pictures of men in bathrooms, men semi naked, holding fish, sticking their tongues out, using children to show how lovely they are , flicking the vs, lifting weights, leaning on someone else's sports car... Finally find a nice photo with a not too awful profile, muster the energy for a message... They reply and it's just dross!

"hey babes... You so beautiful! How can you be single?" vom

"you are vegetarian? Don't you eat any meat? " vom

"I don't have any baggage because my ex wife and kids moved away..." nice

Why am I bothering?

Thought I would rant away from the dating thread which is quite cheerful just now... God knows why! They can't live in my area!

At least your getting replies. In my experiences, very few ladies have replied to my messages. And the majority that did, were fake computer generated. Easy to tell by looking at viewed me. And the ladies name not there?
A company notorious for this is 'white label dating'. They own a number of different dating sites, and all have the same fakes. As found out when joined a few of them!

Ha ha! Let me join you. There was 'candle man' who wanted me to buy him a £££ Jo Malone candle on the first date!! He actually took me straight to the shop before we even sat down for drinks!! I was aghast. There was 'clearly gay but still in denial in his 50s man' - who was also a dope junkie. Mr 'perfectly nice on the surface but haven't cleaned or mended my house for 30+yrs' - it was an utter, utter, shit tip. & Mr 'Got serious anger management issues'. Oh & then there was the bloke who thought it funny to tell me about how he escaped drug lords who smashed his house up in South Africa & then he lectured me through the dating site how I'd never get a man after I'd turned further dates down. I actually think OLD is where all the nutters band together.

I never had the joy of a dick pic though...

I 2nd the 'leaning on someone elses sports car' too, Mr South Africa did that. Like we're not going to find out at some point

Why are you even bothering, men are shit in general. Useless, self absorbed and lazy. Enjoy your life on your terms, do what you want when you want!

Why are you even bothering, men are shit in general

Please let's not descend to that sort of crap. There are plenty of men who are not shit in general and have, I assure you, just as many hideous experiences with online dating as women.

I totally agree, ShatnersWig - it's a form of black-and-white thinking that, while it simplifies things for the sake of ease, makes one's internal life anything but simple.

I have had dating horror stories. My male partner has dating horror stories.

If I find myself choosing or attracting consistently dubious/shite people, then eventually, applying Occam's razor, it's worth noting that the common denominator in every interaction is me.

If it helps my friend met her lovely partner online but she did have to wade through some wierdos!!!

I joined a site recently and was inundated with messages. They died off quickly (few days) though when I was no longer a "new member". And there was me thinking I was some hit, irresistible goddess

One guy was quick to message and wanted to chat on the phone. Lots of messaging that night and we organised to chat the following evening. He mentioned in one of his messages that, like himself, I was blessed in the height department. At 5'6" I would hardly call that blessed.

The following morning I checked my profile. Somehow I had clicked on 6 foot!

I messaged the guy and laughed it off and explained the mistake. Well, what do you know.... He never messaged me or rang me that night.

I consoled myself that his spelling was atrocious and as someone that worked in publishing for almost two decades, that would have drove me crazy .

I no longer do OLD. As for why, I just can't be bothered

@Here Presumably he was only attracted to tall women, just as an awful lot of women of 5ft 4 - 5 ft 6 will only date men over 6 ft tall.

OLD = Hell on earth 😢

I'm sure that was it, Shatners. The funny thing was I made light of it saying I hope my height wasn't the big factor in wanting to meet, once I realised my mistaket I didn't really think being a 6 foot woman would be, but it clearly was . Not even a message to say, well, actually it was but take care. I expect too much, I guess.

I'm with you dilly. I'd rather be single, much rather

Aintseennottinyet
I never had the joy of a dick pic though

You must be alone with that? Nearly all the ladies profiles say no dick pics or cock shots.

Back from work. I am going to check out the evening crowd...

Diesel.. Had no idea about the bot thing. Mind blowing and crap

Chin up folks, I met the love of my life on PoF, we now have a house and a 5mo baby together 😀
(I did go on some awful dates before that, but I was his first ever OLD - lucky him 😁)

We’re not all bad! I’m finding being open and honest is getting me zero interest but at least the eventual matches won’t get a shock from me

Yep OP I know exactly what you mean. I got bored with it and am happy to be single now.i just found OLD wasn't worth the time and effort I put into it which I would rather spend on more fun things.

Chiara I may well getting to that stage but I'm (hope this doesn't sound pathetic) proud of myself for even trying after what I have been through with ex!

I’ve kind of given up on it...... initial flurry of messages...... met up with one guy who then inundated me with messages while I was on holiday, then was very elusive about meeting again when I go at back, just wanted to message. He’s since created a new profile with same picture, different name and location, clearly married........

Another guy chatted a bit and wanted to meet for a meal on Sunday in the pub, great, I think. Nearer the time I check my conversations to see it’s been deleted and he no longer exists (presume I am blocked). Strange behaviour as he was pushing for the meet.

Another guy I’ve seen a few times seems nice but rarely available as he has his kids with him half the time........

I just want a local shag really, but I live in the middle of nowhere and most of the blokes looking for hook-up are dreadful or openly married!

Ok as I need cheering up I'm going to share my best yet. He seemed quite normal when chatting so we arranged to meet. Told me he was a meteorologist & it was going to be a lovely afternoon so we could go for a walk. It was tipping it down! Not a good start. His car was blue, one of 3 apparently all the same colour as were his clothes. He advised me that blue was his favourite colour & if I'd turned up wearing green he'd have bailed out as he hates green. I was a bit So to get out of the pouring rain (Just light showers according to Met man) we went for tea & cake. He waited until i chose my cake & then told me he was very allergic to nuts & refused to carry an epipen so if my cake had nuts in it he would have to tell me I couldnt have it!! Bye

Hueandcry I can't imagine why he's still single!

Keep at it and don't feel bad for taking breaks if your getting a string of bad guys.

I was OD for a long time before I met my current boyfriend. I have found the decent guys who genuinely want an relationship are not on there long for obvious reasons.

I kept my profile private and messaged the guys I liked. Made me feel I had some control.

All this stuff from you lot is partly why I don't do OLD (single 5 years) it seems awfully scary and a bit soul destroying

Keep wading through would be my advice.

I remember when I did it and I'd have terms of messages that would simply say 'hi, you ok?' Or 'hi, you're cute'

I was about to give up completely when I finally received a well thought out, funny and personal message from someone who had clearly actually read my profile (rather than just looked at the picture) and took the time to write an appropriate message. That definitely got my attention. That was almost 9 years ago and he's snoring next to me right now.