Boyfriend sending inappropriate messages on Snapchat

[LyndseyW22]

Hi all,
I snooped through my boyfriend's phone (wrong I know) but I've caught him sending inappropriate messages before. The messages are always with the same female, she is sending images of her breasts to him and he has been sending pictures of his penis to her. Asking for sexual favours and inviting her round our home (as far as I know, she hasn't been round). She is engaged to her partner and has children with him and my partner and I have a 2 month old son together. I sent him a text about the messages I found and he first tried to deny it but then admitted it. He said it was because he was lonely... What would you do?

Mary that made me laugh.

OP, I don't mean to be rude but you really don't sound strong enough to leave him. He's done it before and you had a baby with him. Now you say you still love him.

Not sure what to suggest really as I just don't think you're going to tell him to sling his hook, so you'll just have to live with the fact that he's a lying, cheating scum bag.

He had over 600 girls on his Snapchat and not as single male on there...

Ugh! He's a grade A sleaze, even if he was single and childless!

Come on now. Get rid, ASAP.

he said it's because I don't always listen to him when he's talking about work...

So he sends a dick pic.

He's done it twice. He can get another Snapchat account with a different name.

You staying = zero consequences for him.

The dick pics are awful imo. Why do blokes do this. Made me feel very uncomfortable

Im confused, this girl is underage?

If he has invited her round then whether or not she has been there, his intention is to cheat. I'm sorry OP but 600 girls - men who are planning to be faithful to their partner just don't do this. He probably hasn't really come off Snapchat either, just blocked you or made a new account. I agree he is gaslighting you with this excuse that you don't listen to him about work - this is what emotionally abusive cheaters do, blame the other person for their inexcusable behaviour and make them feel bad and inadequate, it really is a particularly cruel form of abuse. You answered PacificWander's question about whether this girl talked to him about work as if she was seriously asking - that was a rhetorical question designed to make you see how pathetic and false his excuse is, because it's not about that clearly. If you don't leave he will break you, and it sounds like he has already started to as you don't seem to have the emotional strength and clarity to see how screwed up this all is.

Sorry if that sounds harsh but as someone who has come out of an emotionally abusive relationship (although he didn't cheat - I don't think) I know how much it breaks you down and how much better your life will be after kick him out, even though it will of course be hard and painful in the short term. Cheating, or trying to, on your partner who is nursing your newborn baby is the lowest of the low, only a real rat is capable of that, and he will do it again. And no, of course you shouldn't be leaving, you should be throwing him out and sorting out child maintenance. I hope you do it Op, you deserve so much better and will be happier in the long run.

Your 'not so D' p is a waste of space he is turning this precious time with your newborn baby into stress, gaslighting and betrayal.
He doesn't care about the pain his deception causes you. He doesn't care that he's diverting your attention away from what's really important (a tiny new life) , he wants to get his thrills elsewhere and then blame you!I
Most decent men and new fathers devote their time to supporting, caring for, bonding with respecting the new family they've helped create. Dick pics are way down the list of priorities.

To everybody that has told me to kick him out... It's his parents house, not our own. But nevertheless, it's still my home too.

There is no justifying what he has done to me. I am going to end it and make arrangements for myself and my son. Thank you.

good for you!

You have a tiny baby, he should be supporting you and helping you not chatting with other women. You are far better off without him.

Thank Christ for that