Anyone cheated on their dh?

[Shouldershrugger]

Just that really. Has anyone cheated on their dh or contemplated it?

Nono

I cheated on my EXH, I needed out of the marriage and it gave me the self confidence to leave. I've been in a long term relationship and now found myself cheating on my DP, I have no excuse this time.

Oh, and I wouldn't recommend it, it really fucks up your mind!

Which paper are you writing for?

No, nor would I ever. Cheating is quite simply the worst thing you can do to another human being without risking arrest.

I can't imagine being the type of human who would ever cheat. It's just not a choice I would make.

No paper. Just a simple question. I haven't cheated. But I do feel lonely. I miss the closeness in a relationship.. not just sex but companionship and respect. Sorry I sound so pathetic.

Never cheated

Long time ago
I was once tempted when I got overly friendly with a colleague she worked in another branch a good 100 miles and I used to visit her office once a week she made it obvious day one she was attracted to me and to be fair she was a good looking lass

We spoke on the phone all the time and a lot of sexual inuendo and flirting on the phone and face to face

We went for a drink and I gave her a friendly kiss on the cheek and she turned and kissed me unfortunately my trouser brain kicked and and
I should.have pulled away but I didn't but made my excuses and left shortly afterwards before it escalated

On the drive back home a certain song came on the radio that made me think of my wife and I decided there and then I would not have any further contact the other lady

I left the company for other reasons a few weeks later changed my mobile number and never made contact with her again

Still feel bad about it now and no my wife never knew (I think)

No, if I ever did I’d leave.

Never. If I wanted to screw another man I wouldn't be with dh.

We sometimes crave what is missing in our relationship for some it's sex
Nothing wrong with craving something that's missing but please try and work it out

You never know your partner could be feeling the same way

No.

John Gottman, go google his body of work/research/books. I'd start there if I were you.

But I do feel lonely. I miss the closeness in a relationship.. not just sex but companionship and respect.

Surely the solution is to sort your marriage out or leave?

So you are thinking of having an affair?

It’s devestating enough if someone you love or care for just leaves you. Let alone if they betray and cheat on you.

Why would anyone want to do that to another person if you wouldn’t want it done to you. 99% of people who cheat must lack empathy and are probably on the narrcasism or sociopath spectrum to be able to do it.

Unfortunately having an affair isn't easy - many men are just out for a quick hook up and will say anything to get you on the hook

This may end up making you feel even worse than you do now.

I think affairs often aren't planned and can happen gradually. It does always get messy though and the hurt it causes is massive.

It would be much better to work on your existing relationship if you can, at least you know the person you are with is genuine.

It's a minefield out there.

I have never cheated on my dh but have cheated when younger in previous relationships, this is why I felt I truly found the one with my dh as I find him gorgeous and although Im quite outgoing and get a lot of attention from the opposite sex it only spurred me on to be totally committed to him. Unfortunately he didn't feel the same as I did and I found out he cheated a couple of times with ONS . I am still with him and although I was tempted to have a revenge shag, my heart just wouldn't allow me and I feel I shouldn't punish myself for being faithful, I was thinking I was a bloody eejit all these years, but nah, I didn't like the feeling I got when doing it as a teenager and I feel good about myself knowing I stayed true to how I felt.

In honesty, I think about it. In reality, I couldn't. I've been propositioned a few times , but I've never taken up on the offers. It was honestly just a query that I couldn't discuss with my own friends. They'd all get sensitive and start worrying.

@DaanSaaf ditto

I didn't although lets be honest I pretty much had an Emotional Affair with a manager at work. I am pretty sure if he had touched me it would have been a full blown affair. XH was Emotionally Abusive but that is 100% no excuse for me not leaving him earlier. Cue us splitting i'm left still in this weird emotional state with this manager who is taken and I have no husband. I also can't pursue this manager because he is taken and i wouldn't want it to be a rebound.

I am happier overall but it's a lot of shit to deal with.

Are you thinking of having an affair just for the fun or do you think you should just leave?

Sick of these journalism threads

Yes.

Well, sort of. We live in different countries so our contact is limited to text and Skype.

Honestly don't go there. I got caught up in texting with an ex last year and although I never admitted any feelings and it was banter he did proposition me and I did consider it. In the end I couldn't and I am NC with him. It took over my thoughts for the best part of a year and I'd never go through it again.

OP is not a journalist, she has posted before.

KRAmum it is difficult and I know how it feels to lose that closeness, you feel so isolated, especially when you think of all the other couples who are loved up. I don't take such a black/white view as the majority on MN, it really depends on your circumstances.