I want a Cat he doesn't !

[cherry1012]

My daughter 3 years old and I live togther partner stays a few nights a week. We have plans to live togther one day, I've always wanted a cat for me and my little girl as we can offer a good loving home. My partner is totally against it doesn't want one and says if we ever get a house togther I can't bring it with me ! He's even said that his 10 year old daughter has an allergy to cats even though her mother has a dog at home ! When he has his dd she stays with his parents anyway and only had her 4 nights a month. Would it be wrong of me to just get one ? I won't want to just give it up either as time moves forward I just feel why should my dd miss out as I'm not having more children and she has no siblings she sees a lot! I was thinking about just doing it ! 😱🙈what are your opinions please thanks xx

You can be allergic to cats and not dogs. Something to do with the danger in their fur I think?

Personally I would get a cat😻 I bloody love them and my kids do too. If any one told me I could get one I would be questioning my relationship. But I've always had cats.

We have two dogs. I work with cats and have to get changed before i cuddle Dp as he is highly allergic to cats. Id love a cat but i just cant have one. So you can be allergic to cats and not dogs.

However unless this is his only reason (which i think you have to respect) then id be questioning the relationship

Get one I did 😂😂
My dp was exactly the same when we lived together, I always had a cat since being a child and living with my mum with dd
When I moved in with him I said straight away that dd was used to cats being around he was very against it but I went out and rescued two beautiful cats and guess what? Dp actually became attached to one
It's a log loving story and has me in tears as the cat (a beautiful rag doll) passed away after split up

He was like a blessing tho and he still says til this day Tigger (name of the cat) converted me when he talks about liking cats!!!

How good a dad is he when his DD never stays with him.

Is everything else about him near to perfect? Because if not I'm not sure he's a keeper...but I'm a cat lover so might be biased.

It's not for him, it's for you and your dd. You say he says IF we get a house together, not WHEN we get a house together.

The only way you can get one is if you are happy to give up the relationship BEFORE you'd give up the cat. Don't get one then dump it if he insists, or you want to move with him.

I’ve got three cats and I love them. All have different characters and all massively affectionate.
They’ve taught my dd a lot about responsibilities and how to treat a pet. I would choose my cats over a DP who was disrespectful to small furries!

He doesn't live with you, so what's it got to do with him?

Def get a cat.
Much more preferable to living with a man!!

Thankyou !
What do you mean by questioning the relationship?
I think his argument is one day when we live togther his dd won't be able to visit as of allergy in the house we have togther but he has only jus started sayin she had an allergy ! 🤔 he didn't mention it for last 3 years we been togther ! I jus thought maybe his dd could just take an antihistamine! Sounds cruel but my dd is with me 24/7 n his dd visits 4 night a month n we don't live togther

Just to add most things are good with us and him he doesn't have his dd as she lives 4 hours away so travels EOW to get her. She's 11 next year so she may want to start doing her own thing etc but my dd 3 I might just get a dog instead lolll but I don't want one I want a cat xx

When I met my husband he told me he was allergic to cats. I had two. I said oh well I liked you but that's a deal breaker for me, the cats come before a bloke I've had a few dates with. He miraculously recovered from the allergy and now loves them nearly as much as I do. Find out if his daughter is actually allergic and if she isn't, get one. The cat will make him love them.

How do I find out if she has an actual allergy ? Borrow a cat when she here ?! 😬😂😂

Dogs are a whole different ball game. I wouldn’t thank you for a dog. Cats are much easier to care for!

Cross bridges as and when. When you live together you can consider dealing with the cat problem. Personally I’m a bit allergic but love cats do have 3. They don’t sleep on our beds and I have hardwood floors to minimise hair and dust.

Well I guess it is up to you as to whether you get one now as you don't live together but it would also be up to him to choose not to live with a cat later on if he didn't want to.

I got a cat for me/DD but hubby is really a dog person. He hates the cat and it is a constant source of arguments. The cat is young and has been quite naughty but where I see it is as him having character DH just sees it as him being deliberately defiant!

Our cat is subject to many "rules" and I am constantly being moaned at (even by text when I am at work) about what the cat has done. It's exhausting tbh. Am starting to regret it but I have always had cats and love them.

How do I find out if she has an actual allergy ? Borrow a cat when she here ?

If she claimed to have a peanut allergy would you give her a peanut to make sure?

I had cats and my ex became severely allergic to them. He was fine with my dog.

Puss the cat is a rival for your affection and attention. That's why dh is so hostile. I couldn't be patient with that attitude. The cat probably knows that DH doesn't like him. Someone needs to be rehomed - guess who? Not the cat!

Get the cat, your lives will be enlightened with joy and wisdom I wouldn't let anyone stop me from getting what I want in my own home if they did then the cat would not be the one leaving! Believe me the cat will grow on him like my marble cake grow on my husband. Here's a picture of marble cake the Bengal to show how handsome a fellow he is!

Ask her.

Only get a cat if you would choose it over this relationship in the future if it came down to that. Cats can live 20 years or more. It is not a short term commitment.

As much as I love animals I'd be put out if my serious boyfriend who I had plans to move together got a pet he knew my child was allergic to!

Whilst my ex can stroke a cat and be fine, if he stays more than 20 mins in a house that has cats he starts struggling to breathe.

I don't understand how he goes to her her EOW...but she stays with his parents.

Sadly, it is possible to be allergic to cats and not dogs or the other way round; we've found that my DH is allergic to dogs and not cats, thankfully for me, a proud owner of 4 cats.

He's definitely allergic to dogs, though; we could never own one, though as I've never wanted the responsibility this isn't an issue, thankfully. My DSis used to have a Labrador Retriever, it was quite tricky as she used to have to hoover carefully in advance and keep her dog in a different room.

It depends on whether you want to have a cat for yourself and your DD or whether you want a future with your boyfriend. Because long-term he should be planning to have his DD to stay with him at his house and not at his mum's, and if she's allergic to cats then I'm afraid it won't be possible to have one.

I'm not sure whether I could have got involved with my DH if he'd been allergic to cats as well as dogs, as I wouldn't want to be without cats. Only you can make that call, though.