Does your DP/DH shout?

[Daisymae2019]

When arguing does he ever shout a lot? Call you names, try to talk over you?How are the arguments like in your household?

Quite possibly. If they're always the ones who start the argument, if they go straight for the shouting, if they scream and yell over people.

I don't like shouting. I had enough of it growing up to last ten lifetimes and I'd rather be single than live like that again.

I have never been in a relationship where I have been shouted or sworn at and I would not stand for it. I've been married 31 years and yes we've had plenty of heated arguments, sulks and strops, but never shouting or swearing - that shows a lack of respect in my opinion. But then I have a friend who has a pretty volatile but loving relationship with her DH and she tells me she wonders why the neighbours don't complain about the shouting matches, so what do I know?

That's the thing. Some people can have a 'volatile but loving relationship.' Then sometimes one person might think it's 'volatile but loving' (my husband, maybe) but the other finds the shouting really hurtful

Dh has never shouted at me. I had a shouty dad and had no intention of putting up with that

Then sometimes one person might think it's 'volatile but loving' (my husband, maybe) but the other finds the shouting really hurtful

Well if the other finds the shouting hurtful, and the shouter is unable or unwilling to adapt their behaviour accordingly, I would certainly wonder where their priorities lay. I don't want a husband who prioritises shouting over not frightening or hurting me.

I grew up in a very shouty house and I'd rather be alone than live in another one. I've never had a shouty boyfriend. I steer clear of men like that.

No. We disagree. We sit down and listen to each other's perspectives. We understand one another, make compromises if needed, thank each other for listening and caring.
We hug and we move on.

My ex would scream and shout, swear, insult me and always want to win the argument.. nothing was ever resolved.

DP doesn't shout. We rarely argue and even if we do, he still doesn't raise his voice. He never talks to or about women in derogatory fashion. No name-calling. & he has a policy of weighing up whether something's worth arguing about or not. If he doesn't think it is he'll take the time to explain why, and I appreciate that. To him, some things just aren't worth bad feelings. So we talk it out and never, ever go to sleep on an argument

A man who shouts and name-calls his partner doesn't like, love or respect her.

Before DP I spent 5 years with a man exactly like this. He always had to be right, too. I could kick myself that I actually wasted 5 years of my life in that mess. Yet the one before that dickhead was the same too.

I couldn't tolerate a shouty, non- peaceful, volatile relationship and home life ever again.Too much for me after years of putting up with it. I was a different person back then, I'd never put up with it for a moment now so I'm glad I've met the person for me

I wouldn't have if I'd stayed with Mr Shouty tho. If you're asking about your own situation OP, put yourself 1st and don't end up miserable in your elder years due to wasting time with a man who doesn't know what being a loving and considerate partner means. There's more to life.

I grew up in a shouty household. My father was very agressive.

Unfortunately I thought that was normal. So I ended up in a very abusive relationship.

He'd shout a lot. He'd follow me from room to room, name calling, shouting until I cried. I cried most days.

My husband now, would never ever shout AT me. Never name call. Never make me cry.

And now my self esteem is better, I'd never put up with it again from anyone.

OP, don't put up with it x