Ashamed to say, I just feel bored

[BuildingABridge]

I have nothing to complain about really. Lovely house, great job, good network of friends and family etc. I know people have so much harder lives than me and this is going to sound so pathetic but I’m just bored.

I’m married happily enough, no children (which I’ve always felt a bit of a failure about), mid 40’s. I feel like “this is it” and it embarrasses me to say that makes me feel quite depressed. Recently an old male friend of mine and I have been talking a lot about this and he too is in a very similar situation. I don’t think my friendship with him is a threat to my current situation, although the fact that our conversations are escapism for us both and brings us both a change to what is the norm, makes me nervous to think if we are doing good or bad to our very different and separate lives.

I don’t really have a question but just wondered if anyone else felt the same with their lot? I feel like completely turning my life upside down just to bring back some excitement back but reckon even then I’d still need to live with myself.

Whilst hearing all of your really positive and useful suggestions for travel etc. I do believe the problem is with me and my current outlook on life. The relationship with myself will be there wherever I was to go in the world.

And I truly believe it is the relationship with myself that I need to address. I wonder if I’m this current day, we are no longer to be one type of person all of our lives. Do we address our boredom by acknowledging that leading a series of different lives is now a way of dealing with this? Is it so bad if we (recognising that this is a privileged opinion) spend ten years being one kind of person and then change to be someone different? Or something along those lines.....

It's the trap of routine. Order is important, comforting and keeps the show on the road. But some routine is built on anxiety. Trying just a bit too hard to stop bad stuff happening. All that control can lead to paralysis. And anxiety stops us taking reasonable risks.

And it's daring to do the different stuff that is really life enhancing.

I think perhaps we spend so much of our life trying to achieve things, career, house, husband. And if/when we’ve got those things we are all told will make us “complete” we end up feeling a bit stuck and bored by it all.

Have you thought about doing something a bit spiritual? I’m not that way inclined at all, but my cousin is, and I think doing meditation and yoga etc has really helped her feel a bit grounded, I was going to give it a go.
I haven’t achieved much and feel bored and a failure, which is a crap mix