Would you end a relationship because of this?

[everlynne]

I have a boyfriend who has family in Morocco. I have never visited them and he doesn't see them much. We have been dating for 5 months.

He went to Morocco a few days ago (still there) for today which is a religious day I'm not too sure what it's called.

He slaughtered some sheep and doesn't seem that bothered by it at all. It has really affected me actually and I'm just wondering if his would be an extreme reason to end the relationship?

He wouldn't. He doesn't follow a religion.

I’m not a practising Catholic, despite a very devout childhood. But I almost invariably go to Midnight Mass visiting my home country at Christmas, because it’s a thing my family do. I honestly don’t see why you find this so baffling, OP.

No I genuinely didn't know the name?

I'm not baffled. I just think we have different morals. Wondered if I was being OTT. Guess I am.

So you’ve been dating someone for five months, but haven’t bothered to learn anything about him or his culture? End things.

But if you knew he wasn’t vegan/vegetarian, why is this a moral issue? If anything, surely slaughtering an animal yourself is a more moral choice than buying a battery chicken breast in a supermarket or fast-food place?

I don't think you're being OTT. If it's something you're not ok with then it's something to end a relationship over. As others have said, you really don't need to justify it.

As he is (at times anyway) a traditional Muslim, other issues related to religion or culture are likely to creep up. Different values is enough of a reason to end a relationship even though you don't need a reason at all.

Your boyfriend probably sees his family quite rarely and participates in the events as it is traditional. He helps slaughter a sheep once a year? Is it for me? No but at the end of the day not liking something someone does once a year isn’t all that bad. I don’t believe I’m god but I still go to church with my mom so she doesn’t go alone, it’s a similar idea

I'm vegan and my DP eats meat. But if he started going out shooting or fox hunting I would dump him. I would find it hard to come to terms with someone looking an animal in the eye and killing it, but I think ritual slaughter I would overcome (but I would rather they never brought it up, etc). DP not being vegan is something which I find difficult-I wouldn't have got together with him for this reason had I not already known him from when I was younger and only veggie.

Maybe you should try and find someone who has more similar values to you (ie vegan). Would you be okay with him eating a pungent bony dish in front of you, etc?Is it just this that's the issue?

I met a woman who worked in a slaughterhouse. They had to meet a target (I think it was 30 cows per day). Not sure whether it's relevant but I suppose you get immune to feeling any emotions

It sounds like he is celebrating Eid. There are two Eids each year and only one of them (not the one that’s today) follows Ramadan which is when Muslims fast, so there’s no reason he would have been doing that. Lots of not very religious people still celebrate aspects of their religious heritage at important times and I think you should get to know more about his beliefs and background if you intend to pursue this relationship

I couldn’t be with someone who wasn’t affected by killing an animal.

No but one thing no one has mentioned. If he follows no religion when in the UK but goes home and takes part with the family that to me suggests really two lives. The one in the western world going out with you and not being religious. And the one when he goes back to Morocco and is Muslim with the family. Sailing into choppy waters so I would end it for that reason. The animal slaughter is a red herring

Sorry, I'm surprised you don't know a little about Eid. I think if I were dating a Muslim (which I'm not) I'd be curious about what's important to him and about such important celebrations. You might well be too different culturally, and there's no harm in that of course, but surely one of the positive sides is that there's so much to learn about each other's cultures?

You must live under a rock if you don’t know it is Eid. I’m an atheist and I know.

I couldn't be with someone who harmed an animal regardless of whether it was done for religious reasons, as part of his employment or for leisure (hunting etc)...just my personal line in the sand

If you're not comfortable with it, that's a good enough reason to end the relationship, you don't have to justify it

Yes I would, I've spent a lot of time in the Middle East sheep are brought to houses and slaughtered in their driveways. It's not very nice at all so for me (yes I'm a veggie) I couldn't be with someone who found that practice ok.

I cannot believe you don't know it is Eid. Are you Christian OP? If not you no doubt follow Christian festivals like Christmas and Easter. You boyfriend is just like you - celebrates the big stuff with family and follows family traditions. Only difference is sheep not turkeys get slaughtered.

Lots of cultures still home slaughter and would be extremely bemused at any expectation that they should hang-wring about doing so.
It's completely different to fox hunting as the animal is eaten (at Eid a good part of it is given to the poor) not killed for fun.

I don't see how this is much different to the millions of people in the UK who don't go to church but happily celebrate Christmas and Easter....

How did you not know it was Eid? After 5 months of polishing his (cut) knob I just don’t get how you wouldn’t know this? End it.

I'd have been horrified too. I'm veggie and always been very sensitive regarding the slaughter of animals for food. I couldn't be with someone who had such different principles and beliefs. I doesn't sound like you know him very well at all yet so I'd just tell him the relationship isn't working for you and move on.

He was in another country, following an age old religion and ritual. He didn’t eat her hamster.

Ifbyoure brought up in a farm, slaughtering animals is part of life. If you're vegetarian, vegan then fair enough but otherwise I think you're full of shit.

Eid slaughter is a controversial topic - even in many Muslim practising countries.
Rather than ask on mumsnet, I would do a general google search and gather what you can from reputable sources.

I would suggest that you make your own mind up on what you are comfortable with.