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Original poster

Wwyd- tbh think I should walk away?

65 replies

Suedenym3 · 21/08/2018 15:53

NC’d as long time poster: I feel like I might be going mad

for background: Been in a relationship with DP off/on for 2.5 years

in an off period his ex got pregnant: with his baby. Trapped him.

during our relationship he has slept with her out of pity and even though I am certain he doesn’t love her it still hurt me when I found out iyswim

I dumped him but we have since got back together and made promises to each other

if I dump him he will go back to his mad ex which will be hard for me

he’s asked me to spend bank hol with him

he needs to realise that I am the prize

fwiw, I was never like this before him, I think him and his ex’s behaviour has made me a bit mad

there has to be more to a relationship than this surely?

thinking I should just walk away for good because I don’t think his ex will leave him alone

Feeling a bit crap today because we had sex last night

Today he’s asked me to marry him: feeling very confused notwithstanding the fact I still feel angry that he spent his weekend with his crazy ex

Friends think I’m mad for considering having him back but I cannot deal with him being with her as she has BPD

OP posts:
bionicnemonic · 21/08/2018 17:00

If he says things like that about (soon to be) the mother of his child, what do you think he tells her about you?
He really is feasting on cake not just having it and eating it.
Not trying to be unpleasant, but have you wondered if perhaps you just want to 'win', that it may not be him you really want, but you don't want someone else to have him?

Original poster
Suedenym3 · 21/08/2018 17:00

I don’t think I’m a crazy ex at all actually - he always comes back to me whereas with his ex she begs him and he guiltily goes back

she is very abusive towards him and is very vulnerable for reasons I won’t discuss on here

and fwiw there are serious doubts on the paternity of the baby - so she is no angel

he is going to counselling to deal with the abuse from her

OP posts:
Bluntness100 · 21/08/2018 17:02

But op he also keeps going back to her. He's doing that because that's what he wants.

He's probably telling her the same crap about you.

spikeyiscool · 21/08/2018 17:03

He sounds vile. You sound deluded.

YearOfYouRemember · 21/08/2018 17:05

I suggest you need counselling. Why do you feel like this isn't all you're worth? though the prize thing is self indulgent crap

YeTalkShiteHen · 21/08/2018 17:05

Why are you infantilising a man who has two women hanging on his every word?

She didn’t trap him, he had unprotected sex. If he doesn’t know the risks of that in his 50s he’s an idiot.

He didn’t fuck her out of pity, he fucked her because he wanted to.

You’ve fallen into the trap of it all being her fault. Find some self respect and ditch this overgrown man child for an actual man.

RatherBeRiding · 21/08/2018 17:06

So just keep making excuses for him. Keep believing his ex is a crazy woman. Keep believing he is the victim, poor soul, with her abuse and tricking him into a pregnancy. Like he has no choice at all.

This man's a real keeper isn't he? Hmm

Tryingagain1 · 21/08/2018 17:07

Leave him and never look back. Stop making excuses for his behaviour. He has sex with her voluntarily. Stop criticising him for visiting the mother of his child. It isn't the babies fault and it deserves better than grown adults behaving like this.

Eatmycheese · 21/08/2018 17:11

It’s all a bit Jeremy Kyle isn’t it.

You’re not the prize. You’re the prize mug.
Stop kidding yourself, he is using both of you and you’re letting him.

If anyone writes on here that you should give him another chance hen I’m inclined to think it’s you under a different username

fuzzyfozzy · 21/08/2018 17:15

If he loved you he wouldn't be interested in his ex!
LTB

PatriciaHolm · 21/08/2018 17:15

You realise he's telling her the same things, right? That you are crazy, he's worried about you, can't stop seeing you because you would do something stupid...
If she's having his baby, she's in his life forever.

PerverseConverse · 21/08/2018 17:15
Hmm
AFistfulofDolores1 · 21/08/2018 17:17

What I see when I read your OP, Sue, is a woman who will do anything not to see her partner for what he is. Until you can do that, you'll stay stuck. I guarantee you that.

Bodabing · 21/08/2018 17:17

Yeah, sorry another one saying the obvious.
He slept with her, got it up, stuck it in and finished bareback. That's not pity, that's not her being a turn off and not her trapping him. He's a grown adult.
You need to leave and get some councilling.

namechangefriday · 21/08/2018 17:22

He keeps coming back to you after fucking and impregnating someone else who he says is unattractive.. wonder what he tells her about you!
How lucky are you that he keeps coming back.. he actually sounds like the prize. Good for you - as long as you will have him it saves all the normal women who have standards from crossing his path

Newerversion · 21/08/2018 17:23

He says she begs does he?

Reckon he tells her you beg too?

BeenThereDone · 21/08/2018 18:21

Ewww it's all just Ewww. Get some self respect and tell this creep to sling his hook... For good.

Pancakeflipper · 21/08/2018 18:29

Can't decide which one of the three of you liked the drama more. Where's your self worth?

HollyGibney · 21/08/2018 18:31

He sounds absolutely disgusting. In fact you do too.

SilverHairedCat · 21/08/2018 18:34

You are a fool.
He is taking you for a fool.
He is treating you like a fool.
You are being foolish.

Anyway, this man is not worth your time. Get out while you have any dignity left.

Justmuddlingalong · 21/08/2018 18:38

You and his ex are fighting over someone who's not worth winning.

Racecardriver · 21/08/2018 18:40

Don't you have any self worth? How can you sleep with a bottom feeder like that?

LemonysSnicket · 21/08/2018 18:45

Hahahaha hahahahaha 'out of pity', 'she's trapped him'.

Love I bet he's telling her you say you'll kill yourself if he leaves, you're blackmailing him, you're psycho. He keeps going back to her and that won't change, he won't realise you're 'the prize'.

She owes you no loyalty - he is choosing to go and sleep with her with his own head and heart. He's having his cake and eating it too and you're letting yourself believe that she's the problem. You're either naive or stupid.

SirGawain · 21/08/2018 18:47

in an off period his ex got pregnant: with his baby. Trapped him.
Because he's incapable of buying and using a condomGrin

Shoxfordian · 21/08/2018 18:48

He's not worth all this
He sounds like a knob
Don't put up with this nonsense