Part two:

[Carlyxox]

Further to my other post, I've ended my long term affair with a married guy. My heart is absolutely shattered.
But he's got really nasty, threatening me, threatening if I ever get into another relationship he'll ruin it, saying I'll never meet another guy like him, I've never ever seen this side to him I'm very concerned.
Then he has moments of being nice & begging for me back it's really hard to keep saying no when I want him so much

If he threatens to ruin your next relationship, ask him how his wife would feel about that.

But seriously, why are you still communicating with him? Block. Block. Block. And move on.

I guess you get what you get when you do what you did... No sympathy sorry.

But as above block and move on and try to have a bit of self respect and respect of others next time you're looking for a relationship...

Why start a new thread?

You don't have to read it clown faces!! Thanks for your input

He's showing his true colours. You've had a lucky escape

Threaten to tell his wife then block all forms of contact

You have done the right thing. Tell him not to contact you again then block every channel, completely. Phone, WhatsApp, FB, the lot. It will hurt but at least you can see he is a nasty piece of work.

That's the real him - the one that feels entitled to cheat on his wife and use a naive young woman for sex. Well done for ending it.

Why on earth do you want a jerk that's making two women unhappy? (because trust me, if he's showing you his bastard side you can bet he shows his wife his bastard side too.) How could you have any desire for a nasty, aggressive cheat?
Just look at him and think "how fucking dare you try to intimidate me?" Even when he's being nice, as soon as you don't dance to his tune he'll get aggressive again. Why would you waste your time??

Wow what a nasty shit he is, but at least he's showing who he really is now.

I'm sorry but he has been using you, controlling you and dare I say he's groomed you into thinking he cared. He's upset that his sexual entertainment is no longer accessible to him, that's it.

You are well rid of him, he's a manipulative arse and doesn't deserve any of your care, compassion or headspace.

Block him, if he persists report him to the police for harassment and hopefully they will pop around to have some "words of advice" lets see how he explains that to his wife!

You've just said he's being nasty, yes you can't turn off feelings overnight but he's showing you he's a waste of space. Stop being in contact with him. Block him from everything

So why haven't you blocked him?

Because you enjoy the drama? Because you think it shows that he cares?

More dramaz....

You could make it all stop. If you wanted to. Even this new thread is another way to keep the cheap thrill of fucking a married man alive.

Well I'm not judging you .. well done for ending it . But these men have a habit of worming and manipulating their way back so you owe it to yourself to stay strong and go totally No Contact. .. and there is no way he can interfere in future relationships when he risks you telling his wife !! Let us know how you are

“You’ll never find another guy like him” 😂 a shit bag who cheats on his wife and treats you as second best . Your response should be “I sincerely hope I don’t” and block him. Onwards now OP. You can do much much better than this midlife crisis personified !

Eeeeer

Surely ‘contact me again and i’ll tell your wife’ is all you need to say and then block?

I’m afraid this is a drama of all your own making. I really dont think it needs a whole new thread but hey ho....

Sadly you will meet many other men like him.

Well, looks like you're very well out of it there. I mean he was cheating on his wife which already tells you he isn't a nice guy but atleast you have proper confirmation now. You're young, we've all made mistakes at that age but hopefully this experience will teach you to recognise signs of a good guy and not so good guy, cheaters rarely are the good ones (If ever)

I'm glad you've ended it op. Don't let him suck you back in. You are only 25. You have all the time in the world to start again. Blovk him and put him firmly in your past. He's shown you who he is so believe who he is and move on. In a year's time you might look back and think what was I thinking. In 2 years time you could have a man and a life plan for yourself instead od hanging onto someone's sloppy seconds. You will feel bad now but anything has to be better than this half life. I have never wanted to share someone. I've always wanted a man just for me. Which I have and you can too. Let him go.

Block* sorry for any typos. I'm on my phone.

Had the previous thread gone too quiet? Not sure why you want to update us with this... You had an affair, loads of women on here (myself included) have been affected by affairs, do you think we'll applaud your newfound morality? And it's still all about you... How badly he's behaving wrt you.
Not meaning to sound harsh, but these posts are very self centered in a situation which causes untold misery if revealed. Can't summon up any words of praise, I'm afraid. Sorry.

What, me or OP? This was mentioned at the end of the previous thread which I was following, and I haven't been on mumsnet for a few days, if that was directed at me @onedayonedaymaybe. I didn't notice it had been quiet for a few days. But my q still stands as to why someone who has been having an affair comes back to say they've ended it (a good thing to do) but only because the affair partner was behaving like an arse to them. No concern for anyone else involved. At least, that's how I read it. I accept that I may be a bit sensitive, having been on the receiving end of cheating.

I think she means he turned nasty because she ended it.

Ah yes, I see this now. Still, comments like it's really hard to keep saying no when I want him so much don't help much. Anyhow. Best out of it.