I'm 33 in a few weeks and I feel like giving up.
All of my twenties I had relationships. Lived with two of them - both moved abroad! One ended up being married and I didn't find out for months and was heavily invested which was shit. The most recent I'm pretty sure was abusive...he would tell me what to wear on the beach, belittle me, go into moods where he wouldn't speak for days and say that he wasn't sure if he loved me, only to try and make it up a day later. It was shit. Very recently an old friend said he had feelings while he was engaged to someone else - I thought I felt the same but said he needed to speak to his other half before we even met up...cue him no longer speaking to me.
So here I am at 33, watching everyone else live their lives while mine passes me by.
I have led such an independent life in my twenties - lived alone for the last few years, got a house, etc etc. I have had all sorts of hobbies, been on dates and given it a proper go, not written people off too soon etc etc all the things you're supposed to do.
I'm just totally fed up. Everyone in my life has someone and nearly all have families. I'm sick of dealing with house problems alone, sick of being the one who is still looking for someone,
Self pity is so unattractive, I know, but I am so sad. My sibling is younger than me and will be married and starting a family soon. It seems to be so simple for everyone else...and I don't mean that everything in their lives are simple, just that they have someone and that has worked out for them.
I don't see a bright future. I just see a lonely one and I don't know how many more months, let alone years, I can take of this. It's not that i hate my life, it's that I am done with living it alone. I've had enough. I want a family and people around me and things to celebrate and to plan with someone. Nothing else in life will fill this void. I am so sad.