No answer at Women's Aid...

[KickingTheKerb]

I was hoping someone here might be around for a chat...

XP and I had a disagreement and I'm left feeling scared, vulnerable, trapped, alone.

I called a friend but could hardly get my words out...I was trembling and my breathing was all over the place. I'm not physically hurt but I've had enough of feeling like this after interactions with him.

I called the police but they haven't arrived yet. I called Women's Aid and left a voicemail.

Can you knock on a neighbours door?

I’ve no real help to give but I didn’t want to read and run.
Are you safe now?

What exactly has happened? You say XP and a disagreement what kind of disagreement? Arguing and shouting or did things get physical? Has he now left?

If you're scared to go back then go to the police and ask them to refer you to a refuge for a night. I often used to wander round the town I lived in 'post row'' wishing i was brave enough to do it. I hope you're safe.

Google your local council domestic abuse services, you are more likely to get through to them than Women’s aid and lots of them have a 24 hr service.

Are you safe right now OP? Can you go and stay with your friend if you need to?

No physical, no.

Well done, Kicking. You have done the right things. It is terrifying. I hope everything doesn't happen at once. The police will give you more info about your local WA, and support you in lots of ways and put you in touch with people who can help.

These abusers are all the same in so many ways. You are absolutely not alone.

I've been told by police to stay with friends for the night when I was terrified. My ex doesn't believe he does anything wrong. Like ever.

Well done for calling the police, we are here if you want to talk, even if its just to chat.

Has he gone now? Are you safe? If he has left the house lock all doors make sure all windows are shut and secure. If he comes back trying to get you to let him in call 999 straight away

He's gone. He left about 2 hours ago and I'm still shaking.

I'm annoyed that it affects me so much.

He talked over me, kept repeating himself told me I need to change my perspective. He wants me to sort something out and I won't. He doesn't like that so he said that he's done his bit now I have to do the rest.

It doesn't sound much when it's written down.

There's obviously more to it but I don't know if I can type it all.

Can you call anyone to come and be with you?

He has the DC every weekend, but it doesn't suit him this weekend so when I say the default arrangement is that you have the DC at the weekend he says where's that in writing?

I don't know how to explain...

So you've had an argument?

Is he actually abusive but you're not explaining it very well? We need a little more info? Are we talking emotional abuse? Financial abuse?

Yes, an argument. When it's easily summed up in one word it doesn't seem like a big deal. But it feels like a huge deal to me.

Has he been violent to you in the past?

What are you wanting the police to do? Do you feel you or the children are at risk of harm?

You can call the Samaritans if you need to talk. Their number is 116123.

No, not violent. Spiteful, passive aggressive, never backs down.