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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Livid with OH

45 replies

babbi · 27/07/2018 22:45

He has just said that he is disappointed that I did not make an effort to be more trim for our recent holiday .... I am a size 6-8 !! I am so angry and to be honest fed up with his obsession with keeping fit that I have ended things .....
I think I am doing not too badly in my 50's .... have I over reacted in telling him to get stuffed....?

OP posts:
AnneLovesGilbert · 27/07/2018 22:46

No.

How much effort did he make?

gamerchick · 27/07/2018 22:47

No you haven't, he's going to be disappointed in any relationship. Woman's bodies change. Does he expect to get young woman for the rest of his life?

honeylulu · 27/07/2018 22:49

"Trimmer" than 6-8? There'd be barely any of you left!
What is he on about?

Original poster
babbi · 27/07/2018 22:50

He is super trim because he runs miles every day .... he is determined to stay as fit as he was in his 20's - he is in his fifties too..... fair enough his choice ... but I don't want to be assessed / criticized for not having the same body I had in my twenties .....

OP posts:
findingmywaytoday · 27/07/2018 22:50

He sounds like a keeper Hmm. Sounds like he needs to put a huge amount of effort into his attitude.

NonaGrey · 27/07/2018 22:50

He is a Greek god I take it?

Why does he need you to meet some particular standard? You aren’t a possession he gets to show off in the sunshine.

RLOU88 · 27/07/2018 22:51

I think you pretty much know the answer to your question and the reaction you’re going to get here.

FuckyDuzz · 27/07/2018 22:52

Can you even get trimmer than a size 6-8?! Shock

bastardkitty · 27/07/2018 22:52

Jesus. Tell him his cock is disappointingly small and thin. He sounds awful. And obsessed. And vain. And pathetic really.

restingbemusedface · 27/07/2018 22:55

Yes how can you be trimmer than a size 6?!

AdoraBell · 27/07/2018 22:57

You haven’t overreacted at all.

DrMorbius · 27/07/2018 22:57

So now you have his MO. He selects small framed women and he undermines them to get them to be smaller/thinner to excerpt his control.
He has a problem, run for the hills >>>>>>>>>

Original poster
babbi · 27/07/2018 22:58

Thanks very much to you all - as RLOU88 says - I knew this - but the statement was so bloody ridiculous I was thinking what on earth ?? !!

You are all bang on the money - he will never be happy in a relationship... yes my body will change - we all have the battle of age to fight !! Being trimmer would be stupid and unhealthy - I am not arm candy to be shown on the beach ...

and yes most of all - the biggest work out he needs is on his attitude ..

Thanks again ..... off to bed and will get up tomorrow - new life again as single - but happy with no vain fool undermining my confidence ....

OP posts:
Bouledeneige · 27/07/2018 23:00

He sounds such a bore.

You deserve someone more fun in your life.

Cawfee · 27/07/2018 23:16

He’s going to be a very unhappy man if he’s trying to keep a 20’s body in his 50s. Best off out of that nonsense!

SheGotBetteDavisEyes · 27/07/2018 23:17

new life again as single - but happy with no vain fool undermining my confidence

I am SO glad to hear that OP. He sounded pretty awful to have said that to you.

NonaGrey · 27/07/2018 23:25

babbi he isn’t worthy of you.

Flowers
Voice0fReason · 27/07/2018 23:25

No-one who is that obsessed with looks is worth keeping around.

Mrsmadevans · 27/07/2018 23:26

You just did yourself a massive favour OP .

Pippylou · 27/07/2018 23:35

Nope, you really don't want to be smaller than that, it's not great hormonally to be constantly restricting & not great for your bones either.

The obsessive running will catch up with him too.

Balance in all things.

Racecardriver · 27/07/2018 23:54

Good on you OP (both for getting rid of your idiot and for being so slim-properly impressed there, I'm in my twenties and can't muster the will power to stop shoving cake in my face for long enough to shed the remaining post baby weight, I very impressed). He is really going to regret being such an idiot when he starts dating again a realises that you are in great shape but you definitely won't regret your decision, that much is clear.

confusedmomm · 28/07/2018 00:02

Good on you!!

Rebecca36 · 28/07/2018 01:18

Enjoy being single! You don't need baggage like him.

MortyVicar · 28/07/2018 01:19

Tell him he's right, you did need to lose some weight - and you feel much better now that you've lost 12 stones.

SandyY2K · 28/07/2018 01:20

He's crazy. Glad you've ended it.