Does anyone elses DH mock their music tastes?

[ShirazShirley]

Because mine does, and I’ve only just realised how much it annoys the hell out of me.

Dh is very into rock/metal bands. Shortly after we moved in together he proclaimed he couldn’t listen to ‘shite’ music and will pull faces, moan and strop about if I put anything on he deems as below his musical tastes.

I’m not sure if it was the whole blinded by love thing, or the fact that he helped me leave from a previously abusive relationship when we were just friends, but I’ve just sort of sucked it up before.

I’ve just realised today that I’ve essentially stopped listening to any music that I personally like over the years. I’ve always been happy to listen to ‘his’ music constantly, even if I didn’t like it that much, because to be honest I wouldn’t ever moan about someone’s music choice, and it made him happy.

And I’ve just realised it today because for the first time, rather than hiding on a different floor of the house or putting in headphones to listen to ‘my’ music, I’d started a trial of apple’s music (where you can try different genres and find any song you want for a monthly fee)

I wanted to try it because we were considering getting an apple homepod smart speaker.

I decided to mess around with it and found that I actually quite like some Spanish, country and pop music, as well as some classic rock. So I made a playlist to exercise to and shower with this morning.

Dear lord.

You’d think I’d just shot dh’s Puppy. The looks, the disdainful sniffs.

He’s announced that in fact he would HATE to get a HomePod speaker, and we will not be getting one, because he can’t stand listening to any music that he doesn’t explicitly like and approve of.

I should throw him out shouldn’t I?

I'm so sorry that you're married to my ex's twin. Bastard actually made me throw away some cds. I replaced them once I realised what he was up to and have since replaced him.

Just wanted to add; another one here with an ex H who thought he was king of music. And he used to suddenly get into whatever music the woman he was currently chasing was into. (hope that makes sense)
If I called him on it, he would say "But I've always been REALLY into Brotherhood of Man/George Formby/Obscure Folk Singer Specialising In Nasal Harmonies."
I stopped listening to the music I liked while I was with him. It was just another symptom of his controlling, emotionally immature self, as wise PPs have pointed out.
I threw him and his guitar(s) out and no longer have to listen to twanging and wailing. Have playlists of MY FAVOURITE STUFF! And I'm starting to dance and sing again.
Music is for enjoyment. It's not about who is the coolest.

My husband also took the piss out of my music and this extended to tv, movies, books, magazines, food, clothes, hair styles, interior design - basically everything.

With a a few years I was only listening to my music when he was out, watching my TV programs during the day, eating in secret, wearing the clothes he liked, seeing the people he liked.

pretty soon I didn't see my family, I had no friends, I didn't work...

Be very careful about this. if he is moaning about your choices, it will extend to everything you do that annoys him. You need to fight back on every single action.

Next time he mocks your bad taste in music, tell him that should be the least of his worries as you’ve suddenly realised how bad your taste in men in, and it’s curtains for him.

I hate music snobbery. Come to think of it, a lot of the music snobs I know are very opinionated in other ways too. Always want to be seen as being very socially conscious, politically correct and a campaigner for independence and freedom, etc. But wow betide you if you watch a bit of X Factor or listen to “manufactured” artists and feed the corporate greed, etc.

I was in an abusive relationship a few years ago and this is one of the ways he chose to control me. Whenever it came to putting music on, choosing a TV programme or film he would always have to choose because he didn’t like anything I did. In fact he used to say he was BBC four whilst I was channel 4, this was a dig at how superior he felt he was compared to me. He was an obvious psychopath looking back and I was well rid.

Having said that, my DP and I like some of the same music but not others which is fine and normal. The music he likes that I don’t like gives me a headache though so I do ask he keeps it down, it’s drum&bass for reference.

My ex did this about films and TV. His taste was best and over the years I gradually stopped watching things I liked. Now he's gone and I am really enjoying all the movies and shows I missed out on for ten years! Freedom!

Kick that dickhead to the curb and enjoy some Bob Harris Country!