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Original poster

This woman's divorce settlement sets back the cause of feminism.....

229 replies

mozhe · 24/05/2007 23:53

.....£48 million for 28 years of marriage ! I wonder what she did for that...She stayed home and bought up 2 children,( now long grown..), gave some dinner parties, presumably shopped and enjoyed herself but as far as I can see she didn't actually participate in her DHs buisness dealings....so why has she got £48million ?

Answers on a postcard....

OP posts:
expatinscotland · 25/05/2007 12:02

Most people will find something else to whinge about . . . like their partner's ex, or French women in general or mothers who work full-time or blah blah blah.

If someone had given me a property when I was 18, and have sold it and used the money to run off to Nepal.

Anna8888 · 25/05/2007 12:02

expat - are you jealous? is that what you're saying?

I worked damn hard to have the life I have now. I had a good education, but I paid for a lot of it (the bit that has enabled me to make money) myself.

expatinscotland · 25/05/2007 12:02

I'd have, not 'and'.

Most 18-year-olds don't think like 30-year-olds.

expatinscotland · 25/05/2007 12:03

Oh, yes, Anna, I'm so jealous.

Puhleeze.

Anna8888 · 25/05/2007 12:03

expat - OK, so you were irresponsible aged 18. I wasn't. Maybe that's the difference between us.

expatinscotland · 25/05/2007 12:03

As usual, Anna always brings the conversation around to being about herself.

expatinscotland · 25/05/2007 12:04

That's not the only difference, Anna, thankfully.

Wordsmith · 25/05/2007 12:04

Because, Anna, what is independent about somebody (whether it's parents or husband) just handing you a property on a plate? Yes I know many children of property-owning parents will probably inherit a property (but probably not at 18) but how can you say you're doing it so they can be 'independent'? if you said you were doing it to avoid paying 40% tax, that's understandable and fair enough, but don't go pretending being handed a property at 18 is somehow going to make your daughter independent. What makes someone independent is being responsible oneself for ones successes and failures.

bossykate · 25/05/2007 12:04

anna, is it really the cultural norm in france to brag so much? it really isn't done here you know.

tinymum · 25/05/2007 12:05

She should have got 50%. If her husband wasn't prepared to have an equal partnership under the law, he shouldn't have got married in the first place. Simple. Or made her sign a very romantic pre-nup.

Anna8888 · 25/05/2007 12:07

wordsmith - independence is obviously many things, but with no money, you are never independent. I don't want my daughter to have to marry for money or not do the studies she needs to do to get on in life.

What do you suggest we do? Pay 40% to the tax man and spend the rest on cars and restaurants? Come on....

Anna8888 · 25/05/2007 12:09

I don't think it's bragging at all, it's about bringing up our daughters to have more choices and greater independence than we have had, which is one of the most recurrent themes on MN... as is the sitting around whinging theme as well...

Twiglett · 25/05/2007 12:11

I actually think the worst thing to do to a child who you hope will be able to make a strong independent life is to buy them a house / give them wadges of money

and if you want to see why .. just look at tara palmer tonkin-twat

Twiglett · 25/05/2007 12:13

I grew up in a family with little money but strong values .. all 4 of us made great lives for ourselves without relying on mummy and daddy to give us it

I know a few people who were running to their parents in their 30's ffs .. because their parents didn't bring them up to stand on their own 2 feet

I hope we're as strong as my parents were because I can see how very easy it would be to give them that OTT 'start' in life that basically destroys their desire to make something of themselves

Anna8888 · 25/05/2007 12:14

Twiglett - it's not a house, it's a small property, our lives are nothing like Tara PTs.

Why are you all so angry? You could all remortgage in the UK for a tiny bit of capital, buy a small property in France for your children's future which you rent out to pay the mortgage. Try Abbey...

Twiglett · 25/05/2007 12:20

who's angry? I'm not angry

I think its a huge mistake but its one I wouldn't make and you obviously think its a huge benefit .. hope you're right and I'm wrong

Twiglett · 25/05/2007 12:22

I'm rather cross at the crap the OP spouts consistently though because its so obvious

tinymum · 25/05/2007 12:24

Its very hard for young people to get on the property ladder these days. Personally, if I could afford to buy a property for any of my children, I would. I think its nice to help your kids out if you can. Theres a big difference between giving them everything on a plate and trying to do something that will benefit them in the future.

Lots of people have savings plans for their children to help them in the future, or premium bonds or whatever. I cant see whats wrong with that?

Anna8888 · 25/05/2007 12:24

Twiglett - I just want my daughter (and stepsons) to have done as much as possible by 18 so that they can make good informed decisions about their future and to do that they will need some money. That's the way of the world - no free university or cheap property anymore.

Piffle · 25/05/2007 12:24

I'm making my kids independent by offering them the best education I can get for them - university to carve out there own careers.
Then the buck stops. And the £'s stop.

Piffle · 25/05/2007 12:25

I got a huge chunk of money when I was 20, inheritance
I blew it all, as did my brother (18)

brandnewhelsy · 25/05/2007 12:26

Can't read all of this thread, but how does buying your child property make them INdependent - surely it's the other way round?
And - answer to OP - as one premise of feminism is that the personal is political, surely that means that the recent divorce settlement is in fact a win for feminism with the courts recognising the contribution of the woman to her partner's material success and probably, therefore, to his quality of life by managing their home and family, and in putting an economic value on that?

FioFio · 25/05/2007 12:26

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Muminfife · 25/05/2007 12:36

This reply has been deleted

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margoandjerry · 25/05/2007 12:37

Two approaches to feminism here:

  1. feminism caused homework and childcare to be valued appropriately so this win is a victory for feminism

  2. feminism enabled women to find value and reward outside of the home and to give them a value beyond "just" childrearing and homemaking so this is a defeat for feminism.

Depends which view you take. I think there's merit in both views which is why I see the OP's point and don't think she merited the grief she's got. Yes, childcare should be valued (view 1) but women must also be able to live outside of the domestic sphere (view 2).

The OP is just emphasising the second view - most people on here are taking the first view. It would be nice if people could see the value in each argument.