Should I leave my partner due to infertility issues?

[Lilmisschatabox31]

Me & my partner have been together nearly 5 years. For the last 3 years we have been trying for a baby & got no where.
We have been for all the tests ( I am fine my eggs are just decreasing a little quicker than normal for my age.... 31 )
My partners sperm count & motility are normal just his sperm shape is at 1% when apparently it should be at 4% for a healthy shape.
Does anybody know anything about this??
My partner is 33
Do I even have a chance of getting pregnant really??
We were told we could get pregnant naturally or to go down the ivf route. ( truth is we can’t afford it ) and if I’m honest why should I pay for something when I know I can naturally get pregnant???!!!
My partner isn’t willing to try a sperm donor, foster etc
I currently have a child who is now 6 years old from a previous relationship
I have always wanted lots of children & although I know some women never get to experience it at all I should be grateful ...well I am I just feel it’s so unfair not to go on & have more when I can and would like too.
I also work with children & have done ever since leaving school.
I believe it’s what I’m put on this earth to do, love & care for all children.
It breaks my heart that I don’t get a chance of a proper happily ever after.
I feel as though I have met the man I always wished for but yet I find myself more & more now wanting to give him a chance of trying with someone else ( maybe we’re just not meant to have children together ) maybe he isn’t my soul mate. Maybe it will work for him with someone else?
Our relationship is good and we’re so happy but this just breaks me every time. There’s nothing we can do and we can’t afford to try for ivf! I feel hopeless
Each time someone new tells me there pregnant I feel so sad & upset, angry & I can’t seem to shake the feelings off. I would just like to be happy for others but I can’t.
It’s eating me up & I don’t know what to do to make things get better.

I think there are some very, very harsh responses on here. It’s not shallow to be desperate for more children for god sake.

I don’t want kids, but even I can manage some empathy. You’re not married to this man, and you’re asking if this relationship is right for you if you’re desperate for more children, but can’t manage them together. This is a sensible and adult question to ask yourself before getting married.

Male with fertility issues here. Been TTC for seven years. One BFP that ended in MC just two days after pregnancy test. Heartbreaking.

I suggested to my DW that we could use donor sperm. She said no. With me or not at all. We've decided on a house full of pets. Cheaper. Cuter.

It's heartbreaking not to be able to give my DW what she wants most in the world. But she chose me over children.

Perhaps you should consider your DP's feelings and stop being so selfish.

It's very trite to say the OP is selfish. When you desperately want children and for whatever reason think you may not be able to have them you can become quite desperate. It's not a crime if the OP decides her will to have children is greater than her live for her partner, people shouldn't be so unbelievably rude to her about it.

It's not trite to call the OP selfish. It isn't fair or helpful, but it's an understandable reaction from someone who undoubtedly identifies with her DP's situation. This is a very emotive subject and there will be a lot of projecting going on.

Only the OP can decide whether her longing to have another child is more important than her relationship with her DP. It's a risk, as I said earlier, as there are no guarantees in life, but if she stays with her DP she might well end up resenting him in which case they will end up breaking up further down the line anyway.

I think that's it OP, there are a lot of people projecting on this thread. The truth is none of us know what your relationship is actually like, only you know how you feel. If you make the decision to stay and not have another child (not saying that it may not be possible to have a child with your current partner) then don't stay out of misplaced guilt.

I believe it’s what I’m put on this earth to do, love & care for all children

What ? Really ? Don’t you want more from life ? Well, I guess everyone is different.

I have children from a previous relationship. Tried with new husband for 2 years. My tests showed I had good fertility. His showed he had a good count but 0.5% morphology (decent shape of sperm).

Never at any point did I consider leaving him. Not once. We were fortunate in the end that IVF try #1 did the trick. Strangely enough we didn't even need ICSI in the end.

I know IVF is costly and the desire for children can be consuming but you have essentially put a 'worth' cap on your dp. His worth is less than ivf costs, essentially.