Anybody else have a shit Fathers Day or just me?

[DesperateHusband]

Three teenagers. All basically forgot. Two I reminded during the morning which ended up in an argument about something unrelated. I went out and came back to find hastily written card my wife had bought before with a wrapped up "present" - a fucking chocolate orange from the cupboard with my wife smiling saying see they didn't forget. Third child hasn't said a word all day despite being in the car with her when Fathers Day mentioned on the radio. For dinner I got instant noodles made by my wife. Drowning my sorrows with red wine I bought myself. Meanwhile Facebook awash with friends posting pictures of lovely messages in cards, loads of presents, nice dinners etc. Feeling thoroughly crap and unappreciated.

teens are selfish demons :)
It does get better when they're older though.

Some teens can be selfish and inconsiderate. However, we've always made sure that each other get appreciated and that a little thoughtfulness will go a long way.

Text messages from each child and a phone call from one of them last night. One away on holiday, the others 'too busy' with course work to see me.
Gift is in the post apparantly - slightly upsetting but had an enjoyable day with friends in any case.

Some perspective for you.
I took my DD dad out for lunch with my mum.
And it was just me.
My sister isn't here anymore.
She passed away and it was my dads first fathers day without his youngest daughter with us at dinner.
Tough going but we got through it.

I'm sorry yours wasn't brilliant but just wanted to show you - it could be a hell of a lot worse!

Well said pallisers .....there was no need for that, waxy, no need at all.

Yeah, crap here. My dad died when I was a child and spent the day at work helping other people to choose presents for their dads.

Sorry but them being teens isn't an excuse, they are just being ignorant and rude. I wasn't a great teen, very temperamental, harsh and nasty about my parents at times, but I still got them something on mother/fathers day. They are being ungrateful.

Sorry they got you nothing, I'd be forgetting mothers day now too since your wife didn't bother to remember either.

I'm 28, I didn't bother with Father's Day this year. Simply sent a text.

Probably because my DS doesn't have a father so I guess I didn't really want to make a big deal

I planned my own day. Bought myself beer and sealed myself in the den to watch the football. Got brought back to the real world by DS asking me if I fancied going for a kickabout at 4.30pm then got home in time for the Brazil game. At some point I ate a burger but otherwise I impersonated a very sedate cat for most of the day.
Sorry you feel unappreciated op. I like to call it "Dads Day" and do what I want to do for the day without child involvement. Removes pressures from them but means I can't be called on for taxi rides etc.

I have two teens. I bought their Fathers Day cards for them to give XH. One went out with him for the afternoon the other did F- all.

Not terribly thoughtful but they had just both finished major exams. I think that's what's called an excuse.

Well I expected nothing and got something from the one of four who hasnt been corrupted by their mother against me. Consequently I was quite pleased

My mom would have killed us if we forgot father's day or birthdays when we were kids. One of us did forget one year - didn't end well!
Did they do same for mother's Day?
Yes it's made up day but it's about respect for people. I bet the kids would be upset if you forgot Christmas presents or birthdays! It's nice to do nice things for other people and a minimum of a cheap beer glass with best dad on it dosnt really take much effort or money.
We, aka step kids and me, made hiddeous tye dye t shirts, breakfast in bed and some cards. Less than £10 in costs but dp loved it and they had fun.
Hope you have a better time next year x

I'm sorry they didn't appreciate you. It's not that they forgot but that they choose to do nothing. I wonder what would happen if you forgot one of their birthdays?

I wish I could have sent my father a happy father's day message, but alI I've know from him has been abuse. I took the time to write an email to someone who has been a father figure for me. It takes minutes to order something online.

Sounds shit op.

I sympathise with the OP though i am not a dad but its still not too late !)

It doesnt take much,just a little thought, respect and consideration.

Its not a big thing, it just makes the wheels got round a little easier..

I was really annoyed this year that only one of my children was thoughtful enough to make a card and thank me for being a great mum.

So I returned the favour with father's Day and didn't remind the kids to make something or buy anything for him.

I'm sorry, that really does sound like crap - the super noodles most of all! I have had teenagers, I had taught them enough about respect within a family when they were younger, to at least be courteous on special occasions. You could have had them making you lots of cups of tea all day (bliss) or had a family Xbox competition - it's not the cost of the day it's just feeling appreciated and I can see why you didn't. Tell them. You'll feel better and it might be start of better communication. My adult daughter's send a nice card each year on Mother's Day but that's it. I hate Facebook on celebration days...I've lost both parents and it's too bittersweet. Don't go on it.

Waxy1

If you're a good dad then this is a bit of a kick in the teeth, although I don't really go along with this special day stuff. My husband received a text from one DD and a phone call from the other (both in their 20's) and he was happy with that. We don't do facebook - it's designed to make you feel sh1t about your life.

I refused to acknowledge fathers day for my own father but I make sure my DC teens at least get a card for their dad. I don’t like him very much either but I do encourage them to make the effort until they are adults and then It’s their choice

Father’s Day on FB makes me sad. I don’t have a partner to wish it to and my own dad is a shit father. I think although my brain knows it’s irrelevant it still bugs you

That sounds a bit rubbish, but tell us honestly op, are you good at doing presents/treats and surprises on other people's special days or do you mainly leave it to your dp? Just wondering if perhaps you reap what you sew?
If you're thoughtful yourself then massive sympathy

I can't really get worked up about mothers day and fathers day. I think like other people have said it's the little things your children do all the time that count. The hugs, the jokes, the surprise cups of tea. Not some random over-priced card and chocolates on one day of the year.

I love the little things they do every day - the hugs, cups of tea and so on.

I also love the idea of one single extra-special day every year.

I don't think they have to be mutually exclusive.

It doesn't have to be commercial either. A handmade card, a homemade cake, a family get together. You might be the sort of family who do that sort of thing all the time, but do you ever do it just to appreciate your dad, or mum?

Miserly to object to it imo, why begrudge someone a bit of extra love and appreciation, a single day out of a whole year.

Ahhh I hear you... It's crap. Two years in a row mine 'forgot' Mothers Day. I know it's not a real holiday but it doesn't take alot just show a tiny bit of appreciation. Card, cuppa and a hug would do.

Reminds me.. I have a bottle of wine here, might just have to partake 🤗🍷

I even bought the (crappiest) card and stamp for exh but they didn't write it or send it. It Has to be a teenage thing.

Slainte 🍷🍷