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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Original poster

Having a nice day till dp walks in the door.

88 replies

misery · 15/05/2007 22:44

Regular name changer, hopefully if the name change works
Been together for years. He walks in the door and its negative negative negative.
Oh why do you need to go to the shop now, couldnt you have gone earlier?
Turn the music down.
Im in the process of starting a business. Sees some stock sitting in the living room.
"God, How many of those did you buy" In an exasperated, annoyed voice.
Totally, totally fucked off.
Have just smashed a mirror on the bed ad been for a long walk.
This isnt working.

OP posts:

DevilsAdvocado · 19/05/2007 13:11

Have you given him a time limit as to when you want him to leave charlie?

Do you think he could be a bit depressed?

Esp if you think things are funny and he didn't. That's a strong sign on depression, not finding things funny anymore??

Either way, you're better of out of it

charliecat · 19/05/2007 13:18

Well hes paid the rent till the 1st of this month. So im not heaving him out, and ive said as long as he pays the bills and stays nice then theres no rush, because theres not..really, but i doubt he eill want to hand his wage over to me will he?
So ...we will see.

charliecat · 19/05/2007 13:23

The depression? I dont know, eager to get out of bed to go to work but not to spend time with us(dont blame him actually but someones goota get up)
Laugh and normal resonable person with others, just not me

charliecat · 20/05/2007 13:44

As you may have guessed this is becoming the journal of the split. Ok.
Let me be reminded when im sobbing into my socks about...well whatever hormonalness may take over me that, when I jokingly said Hmm you will need to become housetrained for whoever you live with next or yourself even(after he left the recycling NEXT to where the recycling goes) he said something along the times of no need, thats what mothers are for.

Nuff Said.

BreeVanDerCamp · 20/05/2007 13:46

Oedipus Complex

charliecat · 20/05/2007 13:55

erm should i google that or could you explain please

fuzzywuzzy · 20/05/2007 14:05

Oedepus was a greek tragedy, Odeapus killed his father and married his mother (unknowingly as an oracle had prophesised this and so the parents had sent oedipus away when he was born, and so he didn't recognise his parents as an adult).

The oedepus complex is something about men wantign to be married ot their mothers...or somethign like that

charliecat · 20/05/2007 14:51

Oh right...I had voiced the fact that going back to mummy at 34 is 10 steps backwards, and that moving that far away from the kids is drastic and unnecessary but ...

charliecat · 20/05/2007 18:54

Warbling on....just took the dds to swimming lessons where the place is awash with beautiful people, so dp said he would be in in a min, then when he did come in he sat beside me. I said You may as well get a sticker saying Your not with me anymore, just here for parental purposes. He said, Well I couldnt make it much more obvious could I?
So I stropped off.
I know I shouldnt but its early days and I can see him eyeing up people already

harman · 21/05/2007 21:10

Message withdrawn

charliecat · 22/05/2007 19:09

Im ok, have shifted to a thread on relationships asking for a prop up. Wavering now as its 7pm and hes due in the door.
You ok?

charliecat · 03/07/2007 21:18

And feck me...its July now.
Having a vodka, but need to come and vent somewhere, and nowhere to go but here...so here I am.
He has had a few weeks of niceness, not over the top ness, but would you like a coffee etc...
Hes moved out, did that just over a month ago and the relief is IMMENSE.
No impending cloud of doom over my head about walking in the door and getting grilled about how long I spent getting the bread and milk.

But today he really pissed me off, insulting bastard, obviously im wearing a tight T-shirt because ive got builders round etc etc.
Wanted to punch him.

If he wasnt the kids dad I wuld havce nothing to do with the insulting little wankstain.

That feels better.

Dior · 03/07/2007 21:21

Message withdrawn

charliecat · 03/07/2007 21:23

Am reading up the thread dior, the words, though sad dont explain how utterly miserable I was back then. i was also really fecked off with myself for putting up with it. Glad to be out of it actually, really glad.
Cheers for reading
Thank mumsnet for mumsnet!

Dior · 03/07/2007 21:24

Message withdrawn

lou33 · 03/07/2007 21:26

charlie i used to get that, i used to really want to punch him so hard

charliecat · 03/07/2007 21:29

Well Dior, I tell you, I feel sooooooo much better inside, and Colditz further down the thread mentioned her diahorea(sp?) clearing up....yeah, well me too. It must be the churning guts syndrome of the dread of them returning and flinging another insult.
Is your situation changeable?
Oh lou, gonna get a blow up man to BATTER.

ChristyC · 03/07/2007 21:34

Mine has been gone for a month too - fantastic! Still pops back tho to wash. Came back tonight even tho he said he would come on Weds, and dc had friends over from school, so I told him he has to stick to his plans. Walks in, really miserable, moaning about work - what do I care? (stupid ass!)Then says, 'oh, I'll fuck off then' 'OK' I say. On his way out, he grabs a tin of tuna from the cupboard and says in a really pathetic voice 'is it alright to take this?' (cryptic for - I have nothing to eat and no-one to cook it for me, look, I'm really suffering) so I say yes while inside I pmsl!!! God help him!!

charliecat · 03/07/2007 21:41

Oh christy...
My xp has a very different situation, hes paying a MINT for a room in a womans house and shes getting up at 4.30 to cook him breakfast, make him coffee etc
Theres a hot meal sitting on the table for him going in the door after work and she makes him a lunch box
Shes got cancer and isnt working so is filling her time but FECKING ECK.
Life of luxury, shes giving him more consideration that I ever did TBH.
I have a What Do I care attitude aswell..
Isnt it nice not having to argue?

lou33 · 03/07/2007 21:53

i remember that miserable pit of stomach sense of doom and gloom so well

its great not living with it anymore

charliecat · 03/07/2007 21:55

Yep waking up next to the source of my misery at the weekend. and knowing I had to spend the next 48 hour with it.
Oh GOD.
And knowing I didnt have the bollocks to do anything about it.
It was sort of took out of my hands. I was going to kill him next time.
Just to stop him hurting me.

lou33 · 03/07/2007 21:56

honestly i got to the stage where even his breathing was doing my head in

charliecat · 03/07/2007 21:56

Oh lou, that day you had that bloke ask to XXXXX I had similar, made me feel like shit too.
But its not us, its them. Bastards, But felt to shit to say anything, odd that it was the same day.

charliecat · 03/07/2007 21:57

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS.
xp sucks his breath in after insulting me. Fucking hell.
I could punch his head off. Just for breathing in.

lou33 · 03/07/2007 21:57

oh the one who said it in front of my daughter?

you shuld have said something, dont be silly! mind you , you might have been accused of revelling int he attention like i was!

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