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Original poster

Dh ex selling his stuff....

45 replies

echo46 · 03/03/2018 22:11

Anyone been in this situation? Dh can't be bothered with the argument but he's massively pissed off.

He's been asking for his Xbox back for over 3 years now. Everytime he gets told she will 'dig it out' and contact him back but never does.

A friend suggested trying to find out if she had sold it - by looking through fb, there is a way to do it - and he found out she told it ages ago for £275. About 2.5 years ago

It wouldn't of been worth much now but it was the principle for dh, it was his and he wanted it back. It had absolutely loads of accessories and games.

I should point out, he asked for it back after the first day of them splitting up and still has texts as evidence. Even after she had sold it, she still maintained she had it.

Seems very daft to get police involved....wwyd? I think I'd just let it go as not worth getting police involved but I understand completely why dh is so angry.

She laughed at him when he said he wanted paying for it....she's a delightful person lol

He will let it go I think but it has made his blood boil......he just wants to know if anyone's been in this situation as he does have all the evidence and screenshots that she sold it.....but is it really worth it? It's the principle dh says, more than anything.

OP posts:
BoneyBackJefferson · 03/03/2018 22:14

If hes really bothered he could try small claims court.

but she is getting more mileage out of living in his head space.

SuperBeagle · 03/03/2018 22:18

If I were him, I'd just cut my losses and stop talking to my ex.

No way would I be so infuriated over an Xbox and games/accessories 3 years after a breakup.

dirtybadger · 03/03/2018 22:19

My friend did this to my stuff. I was house sharing with them, had a falling out, so moved out under not good terms. I left an expensive piece of sports equipment there, and knew a family member overseas had also sent birthday and Christmas cards (which would have come with gift vouchers) in the month following me leaving. I never received any of it back. Messages werent replied to. Curtains were drawn when I tried to go and collect. Very upsetting for me as it meant I couldnt take part in my sport that season (and I had entered races so that money was lost). Was it illegal? I dunno, maybe. It's probably a civil matter and isnt worth the effort. Stay out of it and assuming there are no DC, be glad there is now no reason to think about her again. Totally get being angry though, I got annoyed writing this years later!

Original poster
echo46 · 03/03/2018 22:21

I think it will all blow over to be honest. He's just gone on about it alllllll day yesterday and today and I was looking for any advice I can give.

When they split, she moved into a new place after a few days and took the Xbox with her and he never knew where she went....that is also theft but she always promised to give it back.

He's just gutted aswell as he was hoping to give it to my ds as his first games console before we went out and bought him a big expensive one.

I'll mention the small claims court, thanks. It's stuff like that I never thought of

OP posts:
Original poster
echo46 · 03/03/2018 22:22

Oh he doesn't talk to her lol. All it's been is 'can I have my Xbox back?' Lol

OP posts:
Dancetothebeat32 · 03/03/2018 23:19

How is it theft if they were married. Without sounding like a duck it would be classed as a joint asset,.,... and it's an Xbox for Christ's sake not a fucking faberge egg, move on and forget about it......very petty and tedious object to be caring about.....MOVE THE FUCK ON THE PAIR IF YOU

marchmadness555 · 03/03/2018 23:49

I'd buy him a new Xbox and hope he moves on.

LineysInTheSnow · 03/03/2018 23:52

Good grief, it's an old x box. Shouldn't the relationships and children be slightly more important?

LolaTheDarkdestroyer · 04/03/2018 00:33

This is ridiculous 3 years and he's still moaning about a bastard x box, get over it! Fair play to her for selling it at least she got something out of the relationship.

MarthasGinYard · 04/03/2018 00:37

3 years ago

Ridiculous

Offred · 04/03/2018 01:10

Yeah, another vote for ‘it’s Xbox, it was 3 years ago get a grip’ as if he actually said ‘it’s the principle’... 🙄

LifeofClimb · 04/03/2018 01:19

Wow, I wouldn’t want to break up with some of you !

OP I would be annoyed too. It wasn’t hers to take! I think he should let it go now though - nothing you can do about it now and I doubt it’s worth small claims.

BrendasUmbrella · 04/03/2018 01:28

Three years yes, but he has been asking for three years. It's not like he asked once three years ago and just found out she sold it. Was it literally original XBox, or was it an XBox One?

Anyway, you can represent yourself in small claims court. Tell him to look into it. If he has proof the stuff was his and that she admitted having it, and if it's going to weigh on his mind, maybe try that route. It should mean closure if nothing else.

BrendasUmbrella · 04/03/2018 01:30

The court fee is £25, it's not expensive.

RosemaryHoight · 04/03/2018 01:36

If you want a games console for your ds then buy him one. Moaning about an old one that your dh had years ago seems a bit sad. For the sake of £275/£300 can't your dh move on?

Aquamarine1029 · 04/03/2018 01:54

For FUCK'S sake, it's an old, useless Xbox. Your husband needs to get a grip and let it go. You should be seriously pissed off that he has bothered you with this nonsense. Seems to me he is FAR too concerned with what his ex is doing. She shouldn't be monopolizing his energy like this. What is THAT about?

EnterFunnyNameHere · 04/03/2018 06:55

I wonder if pp would be saying he should move on if it was something else of his the ex had sold, rather than a console?

It was his, she maliciously sold it knowing he wanted it back. That's a dick move by the ex! I probably agree to not pursue it though, not because the ex hasn't been a dick, but just because it's giving her more headspace to pursue it than just never contact her again!

Original poster
echo46 · 04/03/2018 07:49

Haha it's the usual sticking up for the women no matter what....she did cheat on him and left him with a lot of debt....but anyway clearly not her fault.....

She's in the right obviously.....she's right for cheating, right for leaving him with debt and then also right for selling something of his (over £1000 worth)....

The Xbox has a hell of a lot of sentimental value to dh which there's no point even going into as it will be classed as ridiculous

Like I said, it will all blow over but I don't blame him for being angry at all. If an ex sold my stuff that I had constantly been asking for, I'd be fuming.

Fair enough if I hadn't asked for it or been in touch to collect...

OP posts:
Original poster
echo46 · 04/03/2018 07:53

@EnterFunnyNameHere the Xbox was played a lot by dh and his best friend that passed away. This was before I knew him but during the end of his life, they spent his last months together just playing Xbox so it's the sentimental value. He would never of sold it, he just wanted it back for the memories more than anything.

The ex was with him when the friend passed away so she will of known exactly why he wanted it back. His friends death affected him deeply and he doesn't talk about it much. It was only yesterday I realised how much it ment to him.

Maybe she did do it for head space, I think it's more the fact she needed the money when she sold it and just though dh would eventually stop asking for it back.

OP posts:
RainyApril · 04/03/2018 07:55

It does sound like a spiteful thing to do.

Is there a reason why she might be angry with him? I'm thinking that he might have spent long hours on the x box without lifting a finger to help in the house or something similar.

Or might she feel that he owed her money? Did he take something with him that he shouldn't, leave her to pay household bills on a single salary, pay insufficient child maintenance?

MarthasGinYard · 04/03/2018 07:59

If it was so sentimental I wonder why he didn't take it with him.

Walkaboutwendy · 04/03/2018 08:02

Do they have kids together?

Original poster
echo46 · 04/03/2018 08:08

@RainyApril no dcs involved thankfully. As I said previously she left him with a lot of debt which they should of split but she took everything (they got most things on finance and when they split and she took everything)

I don't think she paid for any of the Xbox originally when he got it. I've never met her before but she does pop up on the fb selling sites from time to time selling stuff so I think it's just a way of making extra money for her. Maybe she got desperate, I dunno.

Anyway dh is in a better mood now and I've now come to the conclusion that it's more to do about the death of his best friend than the Xbox. I always knew about his friend. There's a picture of them both in our house. He has some very precious memories which all include the Xbox. Probs sound daft to some but I get it 100%

He ended up opening up about why the Xbox ment so much to him and now I totally get it (he chatted after I posted this before any all for women posters ask).

So that's all. Case closed. No need for anymore replies.

OP posts:
hotcrossbunsandtea · 04/03/2018 08:11

Why didn't he take it when he left if it was so important, or insist on collecting it after the break up? I know you can get the police to accompany you into your home to collect your belongings if an ex is refusing to give them back.

I sympathise about his friend but it's just a console at the end of the day. He still has loads of memories and that's more important than a lump of metal and plastic.

OliviaStabler · 04/03/2018 08:15

It's been 3 years, move on. Buy a new one and chalk it up to experience.

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