Please be gentle with me....
Ok. Im married, ive been together with my husband for 10 years nearly. He is moany and stuck in his ways a little but is a fantastic man and father.
Drinking is a slight issue for him. By no means does he has a problem. Doesnt drink monday to friday, but then makes up for it at the wkend, he is the most irritating drunk man.
Anyway, totally off guard last year, and something i said i would never do, i started a dirty sordid affair with a married man. I dont know why, life was pretty good.
Its ended after a few weeks, but then we restarted it again in October. I kept trying to end it, but he kept reeling me back in.... until.... his wife found out.
Im mortified, the fog has lifted and ive realised what we have done. He is still lying to her, telling her we hadnt slept together but either way, she has kicked him out and he 'says' its looking doubtful they will sort it out.
We have finally blocked each other and its now time to move on.
Luckily, he has kept quiet about any of my details so i am now able to have the time to evaluate my life and see what needs fixing and how.
(Very aware he only didnt give my details to save his own bacon)
I feel awful for her and what she has seen, i cant stop thinking about how she felt when she first saw our convo's.
Ive totally fucked things up, i know this... i cant even call it a mistake as it happened more than once despite knowing it was wrong and trying to end things on numerous occasions
The hardest thing is knowing im not a good person. I know its all deserved. But can i be a good person again do you think?