Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

What your Mother in Law like?

85 replies

charliecat · 28/07/2004 09:25

Having just started a thread about what your Mum was like I thought another good one would be whats your MIL like..they always make me laugh.
My MIL is a dirty filthy nasty witch.
For example her cats shit in the bath.
You cant see the colour of her carpets for the cat hair.
She continued to send dp details of jobs in Scotland for a good few months after we'd moved to England.
She rings round his single friends before he goes up on holiday hoping they will get him ratarsed and he will sleep around, therefore leaving me and the dds.
She shitstirs where ever possible and she still hasnt accepted that nearly 8 years and two daughters later we ARE together and he wont be going home.
I dont speak to her anymore BTW, I pass the phone over as quickly as possible.
Oh and she used to ring his mobile, not the house phone, as if he didnt live here FFS!

OP posts:
charliecat · 29/07/2004 12:27

I totally know what you mean, Im 25 and I often say to my mum, did you expect me to be like this? Did you ever wonder how we would be when we were older? as I wonder all the time. She seems to have just accepted how her kids are (there are 3 of us) and we are all totally different. If I was her I would be wondering how we all ended up so different.
Saying that, my dds are different kettles of fish altoghether so I suppose they will be when they are older.
And theres nothing you can do to stop your children getting older and moving on so I guess you do just have to accept it and go with whatever happens.
Im going to ponder on this while I do the dishes!

OP posts:
Northerner · 29/07/2004 12:38

there's an old saying I think, that goes something like this:

we hold a children's hands for a short time but their hearts for a lifetime.

mummytojames · 29/07/2004 13:09

im must be one of the realy lucky ones because i love my mil to bits she fantastic and i like her attitude to how we bring up ds every parent got there own way of bringing there kids up and they do there best fil is a different matter i feeel like slapping him at times the way he speaks to his kids (who are all grown up) and the way he speaks to mil as if he rules the roost and every one has to drop everything for him i gave him a bit of a shock when i was pregnant because he said go and make the tea and i was haveing a very sarcastic day so i just looked at him sweetly and said whats the magic word

JanZ · 29/07/2004 13:29

I've got no complaints about my MIL, although I'm not particualry close to her. We don't actually see that much of her, although she lives closer than my parents - but that's dh's choice. It's not that he doesn't get on with her, it's just that we've got more in common with my parents.

She doesn't interfere, but is always there when you need her. But dh doesn't like asking her for help unless we have to a) because ds is her 13th grandchild and she has been "put to work" by all her daughters in helping them with child care and dh doesn't want to continue to burden her and b) because you ARE made to feel like she has done you a favour (I don't feel that particularly, but dh does).

My suspicion is that we will have to start making more use of her once ds starts part time at nursery, because we may need help to get ds back from the nursery to the childminder at 11.30 - an awkward time when you are working full time! My parent are 9 miles away across the city, so it would be majorly inconvenient for them (although they have said that they will help), where MIL is about a mile away. However, dh still doesn't like having to ask for help.

my mum used to say that her FAVOURITE relative (ie even more than her own parents) was her MIL - who was, admittedly, a lovely lady. Unfortunately she died last year at the age of 89. I'm sorry ds won't get a chance to remember her - we were due to go out this year (to South Africa) for her 90th birthday, and he would have been nearly 4, so would possibly have remembered it. Still, we'll be able to tell him he learned to climb stairs at his great granny's when he was 13 months old, when we took him out so that she could meet him

californiagirl · 29/07/2004 20:45

Just got a package from my ex-MIL, unexpectedly, containing a baby quilt. She is a sweet but rather traditional woman. We always got along fine despite the fact that her advice was not terribly relevant to my universe (she thought I ought to get a "real" job, meaning one where you had to wear pantyhose, instead of my career in computers, and she never would believe that there was no point watching sports to have something to say to my male colleagues as they all wanted to talk about Star Trek and babies). The baby quilt is, I am afraid, lovingly hand made in just the sort of pink baby prints DH and I hate, and lovingly pre-washed in some detergent that made the baby sneeze as soon as I opened the box. But it is a lovely gesture and once I rewash it will come in handy for occasions where you wouldn't want the entirely appropriate quilt that transsexual ex-husband's current lesbian roommate made for her to get dirty on. Nothing like a traditional family life, eh?

Ghosty · 30/07/2004 02:32

LOL @ Piffle ...

Debbiethemum · 30/07/2004 23:16

Well I am going on holiday with my MIL on Monday till Friday, no DH just me, her my DS & DD plus my nephew & niece (ie all 4 of her grandchildren). Camping in Wales, so absolutely no respite.

I do love her she is a fantasic Granny and wonderful MIL, terribly over indulgent as she is trying to compensate for not always being able to be there for her children.

I'll let you know next week if we are still talking !!

By the way my step MIL is also great

Debbiethemum · 30/07/2004 23:17

Well I am going on holiday with my MIL on Monday till Friday, no DH just me, her my DS & DD plus my nephew & niece (ie all 4 of her grandchildren). Camping in Wales, so absolutely no respite.

I do love her she is a fantasic Granny and wonderful MIL, terribly over indulgent as she is trying to compensate for not always being able to be there for her children.

I'll let you know next week if we are still talking !!

By the way my step MIL is also great

oxocube · 31/07/2004 07:59

Mine's great! But then she says that marrying me was the best thing that her son ever did so I am bound to be biased

mrsflowerpot · 31/07/2004 10:06

I love my MIL, particularly since I've had ds - she's a fantastic grandma and although she has some quite different ideas about parenting to us (she thinks I'm a big wimp for not smacking etc) she's always been very careful not to overstep the mark or do anything we don't like with him.

She's very very particular and can be a bit annoying (one time she took some sandwiches I'd made apart to butter them better...) but she and FIL have always been so welcoming to me.

With SIL it's a different matter, she's in there criticising every move she makes, which always had me worried pre-children about how she'd be with us, but that's obviously a very different relationship. They live very close by, MIL has been heavily involved in the care of SIL's kids, and I think she feels she's earned the right to say what she wants. And SIL takes enough advantage that she's probably right...

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread