confused regular - about to embark on some kind of naughtiess

[ConfusedRegular]

Right.

I have a DP that I am in a good realtionship with and I have lovely children and a lovely house. My life is good.

BUT.. I have my own issues going back a long way. I have recently joined a support group to explore and confront these issues - no-one knows about this not even DP.

There is a man at my support group who has the same issues as me and there is a connection there that helps me so much and makes me so alive.

On Thursday I am going for lunch with him after session.

I know I should not do anything but - well - he gets me- a part of me that I think no-one else will ever get.

if the support group is related to something that you experienced and you don't want your DP to know then you have found someone who gets you because of a shared experience that you are unable to discuss with your DP. I think you are confusing a shared experience meaning someone understands where you are coming from as an attraction and desire for a physical relationship.

I do not agree that you should tell your DP about the support group - I don't know what the reason for the support group is, but you should recognise the fact that the thing you have in common with this bloke is probably the reason you are at the support group and not much more - wiht your dp you share a relationship, time together, children, day-to-day life etc - in balance I imagine so much more.

I feel for you that you are going to a support group for something and don't feel able to share it but I hope that the support group is a good one and helps clear the path and is aware of the confusion and diffidculty caused by people seeing a 'connection' that is really just a 'shared experience.'

I hope things work out for you. Good luck witht he support group and well done for taking the step and getting some help.

?

Double ?? ..... is CR replying to herself ?

cr is this what you are hoping to hear???

she does sound confused

What is confusing here?

She knows it's 'naughtiness'. Anytime you feel the need to keep it secret from your partner, it's beyond platonic.

Been there, bought the tshirt.

And burned it.

Not worth it.

strange. confused regular, are you posting what you want to hear?

What happened there?

Was confused regular trying to post some support for her alterego & forgot to change her name>

I'm sorry if I offend and I've never said this on MN before but this thread is a crock of shit.

It's so clearly someone namechanging and attention seeking and then forgetting to name change back when giving themselves advice.

To the OP, you do realise that this scenario you've painted is one which so many women on MN are trying to deal with. It may be funny to you but betrayal and heartbreak are a reality to other people.

Why don't you just grow up FGS?

What do you expect folks to say, confused?

Oh, yes, naughtiness is so much fun! Release your inner 9-year-old into flights of fancy.

I've heard of taking your own advice - but posting it ?

i think this should be

THE END

interesting the opening post sounded quite plausible

off to doubt any postings on mumsnet

Don't do it. Been there, bought the t-shirt, ain't worth it, believe me. If you don't want to be with your DP, leave him, but don't do it in the heat of an affair or you'll never know if you could;ve made it work. No relationship is going to stand up against the excitment of an affair. PLEASE don't do it. I have been there and I cannot tell you how much i wished I hadn't. I have a new lovely DP now and if I have learned anything from my past excapades it is that if I feel something needs fixing with him I will try my best to fix it and not look elsewhere. I was in a similar situaiton again recently and I said no to lunch. Is safest as I do not want to do anything I would not be happy telling my DP about. A 'connection' means nothing at the end of the day. You have a bigger connection with your DP and children. Try strengthening that. Am not judging you, god knows I have done worse than have lunch, just warning you that it will not make anything better. And if you really like this other man and think he is nice you will not want to get him invovled in the inevitable heartache of an affair, is not fair on anyone and you have a choice. Do the right thing. Sort out your relationship - tell your DP about your issues and give him the chance to understand and connect with you. It may seem dull but you will be able to sleep at night. And don't go to lunch, it will only make things harder.
Sorry to rant - it's just I know how much pain this can cause and that it is horrible to know that you could have acted differently. If you do go on with this, just be aware that the responsibility will be completely yours, and you will have caused all that pain. Are you prepared for that? Cos I wasn't.

Sorry didn't see CR had replied to herself. Stupid - what a strange thing to do.

God - how weird is this

Message withdrawn

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Ooops!

Gah! you beat me to it Dino.

Yeah - wish I hadn't hatrick feel a bit stupid now - can you all forget what I said please?