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[user9217]

So on Boxing Day I got a friend request then a load of random messages from my ExH's new girlfriend. Saying loads of random stuff about hope I'm happy with myself and that she hopes we have a nice life together and sort it out. Then a very ominous 'well done' at the end. So random! After having a quick look at her profile (to find out who she was before the messages came) I found out a load of truths that correct lies ExH has told me about DS the past few months!!! Best way to confront him without coming across weird/jealous/petty? Don't want him back brw but it's not on and I need to say something to him

I'm really sorry but I can't make sense of the OP - why is your EX's new girlfriend wishing you happiness with him? What does your DS have to do with it?

Im confused...

Either way if it aint life or death , dont bother pulling him up

Sorry should've been much clearer!!! She started off the messages with 'hope your DS is ok' (he's been poorly over Xmas) then when I asked who she was etc she told me it didn't matter, and that she hopes we have a good life together and manage to sort things. I'd found out who she was after sending the 'who are you' message. Then she started saying that she hopes I am happy with myself, did I still love him then 'well done' at the end.
Regarding my DS, whilst looking on her profile trying to figure out who the hell she was I found out somethings that weren't true that my ExH he'd told me, eg he couldn't see DS one weekend cause he was being called away to another country for Work - turns out, it was a holiday with her as she posted details of it on her page. Those kind of thugs. He is a compulsive liar half the reason we split up but I'm not having him lie about things regarding DS cause it's not fair on him.

Things not thugs. Stupid phone!

Still not clear. Is she accusing you of breaking up their relationship? What does this have to do with him lying to you about your son?

The lying about our son is a slightly different issue which also needs addressing. I'm not sure what she's accusing me of she wouldn't tell me!!! My guess is, he's tried to break up with her and lied to her blaming me/saying he's coming back to me, cause she said 'I hope you have a good life together and sort things out' I've no intention of getting back with him never have never will don't know where she's got it all from!

I'm not following your Thread either OP... tbh I wouldn't respond to anybody messaging on Fb...

It sounds like he has ended the relationship with her and maybe said he was getting back with you. If you are not getting black with him I would just send her one message and saying you don’t know what you are talking about and I am not with ex and then just block her on social media. If you are getting back with him (why?) then just block her.

As for his lies. You know he is a compulsive liar. Confronting him will just led to more unnecessary drama so just leave it and your child will unfortunately eventually realise his dad can’t be trusted.

Is just block her.
No good can come of it

It was mainly the cheek of her messaging me about my son when she isn't anything to him. They've only been together around 3 months (we separated 18 months ago) I have no idea what she's on about or where any of it came from. She says she told him she messaged me and ExH wasn't happy about it.

I've let a lot of things go re his lying but I feel lying about things regarding our DS and contact etc like this holiday is totally unacceptable. If he said 'I'm not going to be able to have DS on x date cause I'm going away' then fair enough, everyone deserves a holiday. But why lie about it!? I'm picking my battles but I feel like something needs saying.

Block her, there’s no reason for you two to be speaking. Re the ex’s lies, does it really matter if he was away for work or away with his new gf? Either way he couldn’t see your son that weekend. Lying generally isn’t great but in the scheme of things that doesn’t sound like the end of the world (it’s the kind of lie you tell to avoid a possible argument). I wouldn’t bother pulling him up on it, you already know he’s a liar.

I have blocked her now btw, she's clearly a total psycho. I know he had a new partner, he told me months ago. It wasn't a secret he needed to keep

Tell her you are both better off without him!

@PhuntSox I did!!! She said do you still love him so I said 'hell would freeze over before I'd be with him again' then she went 'okay thank you' silly little girl

It's not helping me trust him when he outright lies about things. He says that I don't let him see DS enough and all sorts but then he goes and does stuff like that

To her, "What the fuck are you on about?" would do nicely.
To him, "I see you lied about the reason you couldn't see DS last month. If this sort of shit continues I'll be looking at reducing your contact time as I won't stand for DS being mucked about and disappointed. Just be truthful for once in your bloody life."

I'm confused.has she split up with your exdh and is blaming you,that's why she's saying this?

I think he’s been lying to her and play mind games with her, by using you. Kids stuff. Block
Her x

Your X is first class prick for lying regarding your DS. Mine used to do the same togo galavanting with various new partners - then he stopped contact completely unsurprisingly.

I would speak with him about it but don't go off on one, just explain what you've seen and that you don't appreciate having DS messed around not to let it happen again. Getting angry over it won't solve anything. Chances are he will pull shit like this again and there's not a great deal you can do about it, getting angry will (in his head) give him justification for lying 'Well of course I lied, she goes crazy about these things ...'!

As for his girlfriend I'd message her saying you don't appreciate being dragged into their domestics and to keep you out of it. Then block.

@KarmaStar I would imagine so, he's told her either it's my fault or that he's getting back with me. Thank you for your suggestions of what to say to him, he Defo needs calling out on it really! He's sitting there now and all this time thinking he's got away with it. He used to lie to me every single day when we were married as I said he's a compulsive liar but I don't appreciate DS being affected by it in the long run. I plan to say something when he has him Saturday and hope that his Mum will be there so she can watch DS while I have a word and also she will overhear and realise some things herself. Although it won't make a difference to her but will be good to have a witness

Thank you @MissTeri it's awful isn't it

I'm not sure why you even bothered responding to her tbh.

Even if you were getting back with him...it's non of her business.

@SandyY2K I suppose as she was in a relationship with her and she believes he's either cheating on her with me/getting back with me either way be taken her boyfriend away in her eyes. None of which are true. I'm as civil as I can be most of the time to him for DS that's IT.

So many typos sorry. Hopefully you can get the gist of it

I wouldn't call her a Psycho OP... that's a bit unfair....

she's probably been treated just as appallingly .. as you yourself have been treated by him...in the past... she sounds desperate for answers and maybe felt you had them. granted she lacks manners and should have explained who she was...

you and your Son are none of her business as others have said... simply block her...