Partner won't move in with me. Am I wrong?

[An0nny]

My partner and I have a 1 year old son together and he also has two children from a previous relationship, 4 and 6 years old. At the moment I live in a 2 bed house with my son and my partner lives in a 2 bed flat separately. His children stay with him every other weekend. He says he won't move in with me into my house as there is not enough room for his children as he wants them to have a room of their own with their own furniture and toys ect as they have quite a bit of stuff at his flat now. However we cannot really afford a 3 bedroom house and I am also a little reluctant to leave my house that I'm in now. Anyway, my question is; am I in the wrong for thinking its okay for his kids to stay with us in our two bed house? As it's only every other weekend I thought we would be able to manage and work something out regarding beds. There is enough space for them to bring some of their toys and keep them at mine (they have A LOT at my partners though so it wouldn't be ALL of it). Do other people manage in a set up like that or am I just being completely unrealistic or unfair as my partner says?

Taylor really? Of course he’ll be aware when dad is there and isn’t. 3rd child won’t be having dad there everyday in infancy which the other 2 will likely have had - 6 year old definitely did or 4 yr old wouldn’t have existed.
ALL children deserve to have their parents and siblings with them, and that would require OP giving up he’d 2 bed house or the DF giving up his if they split up anyway - either way those kids will be moving. He cannot be an effective and fair father if there is no room for all his kids.

How can you be a hands on dad to a child you don't live with? You can't.

Fair point. ...but I mean as much as he can given the situation.

I can't help thinking this is a perfect arrangement for him though. He has total freedom to pretty much did as he pleases in spite of having three children.

It doesn't sound like he lived with the Ex for that long.. if at all given the age of the DC.

He doesn't have the stress of sleepless nights or his evenings restricted by having a baby that doesn't live with him.

I don't dispute his reasons.... and 3 kids in one bedroom isn't good enough tbh.

His children need quality time with their dad... he can see your son 12 days out of the 14.... the question is how much does he actually see him?

pretty much do as he pleases in spite of having three children

It's a real easy ride for him.

do you rent or own??

Maybe he just likes being a weekend dad, you'd think given the rent you pay and his, you can get that 3 bed house

Seems he likes his freedom, hiding behind good dad saga. What does he do for your DC?

Do you believe you are having a bona fide ,real relationship or are you both consciously or otherwise, simply role playing one?

Do you own your home or rent it?

Maybe he doesnt want to simply be your lodger. At least he has legal rights as a tenant.

Forgive me but this all sounds a bit wobbly to me.

Surprised hasnt been mentioned byr do you get tc,hb etc as if you were to live together that would change and he wiuld have to contribute his wages and guessing your benefits would decress or stop

I agree that this is very unfair on his third child.

Does he stay with you during the week or every other weekend?

Do you love eachother

I also agree with pp that it's cheaper to maintain 1 x 3 bed over 2 x 2 beds.

what would be your ideal op if you could wave a magic wand