Things I won't miss about exh this Christmas

[Wilhamenawonka]

I've been a little down this week thinking about Christmas on my own with the kids. Very what's point about it all.

Then i remembered how he used to go round the house looking for his presents like a little kid before confessing with a sad face.
Uuugh. It makes my fanny shrivel just thinking about it.
Add to that all the wife work and lack of thought from him every year and it suddenly doesn't look too bad.

Anyone else got a good tale of freedom?

So yeah, that’s another few things I don’t miss... his constant completely shitty behaviour and whenever challenged on it either dramatic shouting and blaming me for being shit or dramatic crying and demanding comfort to the extent if I didn’t cuddle him he would move onto me and move my arms to cuddle him.

Every fucking Christmas without fail getting a cold. Well actually we’d all get colds. But his would obviously be the worst cold ever. He wouldn’t take anything for it either and instead suffer and moan on and on. So naturally he couldn’t possibly do bugger all.

Not getting any presents from him unless I chose them and in later years bought them myself and he’d reimburse me.

His fucking awful family and their horribly rigid rules about Christmas and generally controlling ways.

Looks like not even my own family will be around this year for Christmas so will more than likely be just me and the DCs. I can’t wait!

Ah that’s reminded me! X was really gung ho re medicines and would always OD.

He would not listen to reason about anything.

He had a cold last Christmas and was OD’ing on nasal spray.

His dad said to him ‘oh be careful with that, you’ll OD and...’ and he cut him off mid sentence angrily shouting about how he doesn’t know anything...

And then the next day had absolutely crippling sinus pain... I knew this could happen with nasal spray but had refrained from saying anything because I knew he would shout me down with his superior mr know it all act...

The sinus pain was delicious... so was reminding him his dad had tried to warn him...

Won't miss being told what to do

I won't miss him not wanting to get up and watching the dc open their presents.

I won't miss him moaning about seeing my family.

I won't miss him insisting he can drive us after 4+drinks.

I won't miss him snapping at the kids.

Love this thread. This will be my third Christmas single. First year was hard, last year was quite good and this year am relishing the thought. No moaning, no having to plan, order and pick up all the food then bow down before him at his cooking. No bloody Dr Who Christmas special.

This has had me giggling. So many comments I can relate to, thankfully 7yrs it has been just me & my dc’s. Love my life now

Brilliant thread.

Putting loads of time and effort and thought into his gifts, only to receive total shit that I didn't want in return.

Having to real tree versus artificial tree argument.

Having to be dragged to his fucking parents and staying there overnight.

The awkwardness of him coming to my parents (because my family always hated him) and him sitting there tutting and jiffling because he couldn't wait to leave. At least when I went to his parents I got into the spirit of things.

Selling all of my greatly loved belongings while I was out of the house so he could go out on the piss. Cunt.

Omg brilliant thread.
I hadn't really thought about it yet - this year will be my first Christmas on my own so to speak. Made me realise that it won't be much different in many ways as I've always done everything anyway! Bought presents (even for his family!), written Christmas cards, wrapped everything, sorted advent calendars / stocking fillers, bought the tree, decorated it/the house, bought and prepared food and made Christmas dinner... the only things he did was buy booze (for himself) and moan about everything!
I shall be looking forward to

• not having to tiptoe around on eggshells so not to 'make him angry'
• not having to do all the presents and cards for his family
• not having to put up with him acting all jolly and festive for his family while we're there while I got nothing but a sour face and bah-humbug attitude at home
• not having to watch him getting more and more pissed "because it's Christmas and he wants to have fun" while I rush around doing everything and look after the DC

Ls were OK, though I have now discovered quite how many lies they were prepared to tell to cover up his real whereabouts

I’ve split up with mine and his parents are STILL lying to me. What’s all that about then?

His bloody family descending about 5pm, just as the kids were winding down. The vast quantities of food he bought to feed them with that none of them touched. Since it was invariably something I wouldn't eat either, that all got chucked and wasting all that food was horrible.

His insistence that he would do all the cooking so I didn't have to. I prepared everything the day before and I could guarantee the moment my arse touched a seat, he would require my help in the kitchen. He always put something in the food that DD1 was allergic to.

Him going out and buying shit loads of extra presents because the ones I had bought his family on the agreed budget weren't enough.

Thinking that 13 year old DD2 could walk 3/4 of a mile alone on the streets at 11.30pm to be collected by a friend for midnight mass, or walk down the streets in the town from my church to her's alone at the same time of night, was okay. and this was after promising to go to her service, which he never did

I am frequently astounded that our marriage lasted as long as it did. Oh that's right - I took my wedding vows seriously...

Hmm well I'd say his family, 1.

1. The withholding of presents or cards according to weather or not he felt I 'deserved' them

1. The frenetic unplanned last minute shopping over spend

1. The forced jollity that stopped as soon as his family left the house

1. The relief that knowing I wasnt with him for that many ruined Christmases... I think we had three nice ones then 5 horrors then I left

6.the insistence on rigid Christmas routines.

Thank god I'm single and happy with a lifetime of happy Christmases ahead of me.

Bumdishcloth that's awful you poor thing my ex frequently used to break or spoil my things (using a photo or a book as a coaster was a favourite) he claimed it didn't matter it was "only stuff". It used to really upset me. In the last year we were together he smashed a favourite bowl of DD's and she was distraught. Again it "didn't matter" and her feelings were also dismissed. I notice his stuff never got broken or spoiled. I replaced DD's bowl (it was part of a set and I had to order the whole set to do it). The bowl is here and he is not. Makes me remember how much I was on tenterhooks as he'd barge around with his big shoulders leaving a trail of destruction behind him.

I don't miss the giant sulk because I didn't get home early enough on Christmas Eve because he was waiting to go out (without me). I'm talking 5pm in case you were wondering what 'late' looked like. I'd then do the magical getting ready for bed stuff with DS on my own because drinking with the mates he went drinking with at least twice a week every week of the year was waay more interesting than seeing DS all excited about Father Christmas.

I also never miss waking up bright and early on Christmas morning to find ex passed out cold on the sofa until he finally woke up, stinking of booze, about 10am by which time DS had already opened all of his presents.

I certainly won't miss the way he completely ignored my lovely parents and played with his phone all day (no doubt texting OW) and generally causing an atmosphere.

I bloody love Christmas now

That's it @Offred girl...let it all out like a pus filled boil.

Au revoir arsehats!!!! 🎄🥂

I might make an ornament out of said nasal spray to decorate my Christmas table, which will be just for me, it is currently migrating around my living room floor after falling from the shelf he put it on after it offended him...

Surely the nasal spray and the prostate massaging sex toy together would make a lovely festive centre piece?

They would but unfortunately he has my half sex toy (and his half too)...

Needless to say the sex toy was never used... as far as I am aware anyway, it was in his custody at all times... for anyone concerned re food hygiene....

I kept his batman dressing gown (a present from me) and his spare dressing gown, he kept my toothbrush, my spare duvet, my spare dressing gown, my slippers and a rucksack full of sex toys...

I like to imagine that he weeps over them frequently... dickhead...

Ufffft I have agreed that I spend the Christmas with ex and the kids. We live overseas and we both want to be with the kids, I'm hoping he will be on his best behavior.

What I won't miss though is in the lead up to Christmas him deciding what HE wants to get the kids from Santa, despite their Christmas list. He is going to buy a few presents from Santa as am I and I am going to make damn sure its the first things on their list (which are not extravagant in price, just what they REALLY want). Or him going "how much???!!!" when I am wrapping presents for my family. This is the man who hasn't worked for years, or earned a penny in that time. Or the arguments about putting stuff under the tree in the correct places, or commenting on how shit I am at wrapping presents (I'm not shit, but he is a fantastic wrapper, but lets me do it while commenting).

I will have to put up with him telling the kids they are unwrapping too fast, and trying to control the whole thing with the same amount of inpatience as usual........and him drinking. But then he can go home, and I can watch shit on TV and relax!

Next year, we split the time ( this is the 1st christmas).

These apply to a previous ex, many years ago, but he was soooooo annoying it feels like yesterday.

Pretending that presents weren't important, so no, he couldn't think of anything he needed. But OMG, the little boy sad face when he didn't like what I or anybody else had bought him. Our last Christmas I bought him a really expensive wallet. He opened it, did a little pained smile, and put it down. A while later I just exploded, and asked what was wrong with it. Apparently the notes didn't fit in as snug as with his current (falling apart) wallet.

Having his brother to stay, who lived a pretend, eco-friendly, save the planet type life in an old factory. He constantly moaned about any signs of conspicuous consumption (like doors, sofas, walls, you know the stuff...) but didn't mind eating and drinking us out of home with our non-ethical shopping. Never lifted a finger and said we had too many sofas !

Having to go to the same local pub near to his mum's every Christmas Eve. Same bunch of ageing alcoholics as the year before, the owner so pissed he could barely stand, then having to pretend to be excited that we were having a lock in.

The first Christmas without him was bliss.

Not having MIL round. Me (and the ex, to be fair) would slave all day cooking, with the children, driving to pick her and her bloody dog up, keep her all day, drive her home and she’d moan and sometimes shed a tear about Christmases not being as good as they used to be!

No nooooooo

Slather the nasal spray on to his half of the sex toy and offer to get jiggy with it 🤣