Not really a relationship topic but not sure where to post.
Husbands ex who he has a child with claims all the benefits as a single parent and works 16 hours.
She also works cash in hand getting around £300 a week. I won’t say what the job is but she works mostly nights. It is nothing dodgy before anyone says anything.
Usually it’s 4 days/ nights a week she does. But the last 2 weeks it’s been every night. Now when she tries to FaceTime his child, he gets a message back saying she’s at work. She also does 16 hours in her other job.
Dh is really worrying over 1: who has the child when she works nights. Sometimes it’s her mum but others she won’t say.
2: how often she is with the child as the child goes to school then the mother starts work at 4pm. We have the child on a weekend - Friday to Sunday.
- When she’s not working, she’s out. Never has been one to be able to give her social life up for her child.
He never misses a payment in maintenance before anyone asks if he contributes. He does.
He is seriously thinking about ringing hmrc and saying about her extra work. She will be getting £500 a week with these extra nights easy.
She is a very difficult person and thinks she’s gods gift because she’s raising a child on her own. She gives dh clear instructions on what the child is and isn’t allowed to do.
This has all kicked off because she found out the child had sweets when with us and apparently ‘not allowed sweets’ her attitude was terrible towards him when she collected the child but it was clear to see she was hungover from the weekend.
She accused dh of being a bad dad etc etc. It’s really brought him down. Over a packet of sweets lol.
Now I know she is allowed to do what she wants, work what she wants, have the social life she wants etc. But it really is getting to dh and the affect it has on the child being passed around while she works or goes out.
I’ve explained the affect it might have on the child if he does make that phone call and hmrc take action against the ex.
It does really piss me off though that some families struggle to make ends meet - ours been one - while others just take advantage of the whole benefit system living the high life. She will get tax credits, housing benefit, possibly income support which I bet covers her rent as her house isn’t that expensive. Then the money from her other job plus her cash in hand job.
Plus this woman isn’t nice. She’s done so much - this isn’t my first post about her and probably won’t be the last. She’s been physically violent towards my husband, bruised his arm not too long ago. When they were together she made him open a catalogue, spent £3000 on it and then kicked him out leaving him with the bill. She’s a nasty piece of work.
I should also explain that they live 40 mins away from us so it isn’t really possible to have the child anymore while she works.
Should I try stop him being a ‘grass’ or let him do it? I feel for the child in both ways here.