Says other woman is 'his kindred spirit'

[septemberfields]

OH said to me after a lovely day out that 1 of his female friends (who he has known longer than myself) is his kindred spirit, though he says he does love me & this other woman is married. I've noticed they have chemistry together but was unsure as to what to do/say.

Feel a bit sad and unsure as to what to do now- ignore the comment or question the relationship between myself and him? I have only been with OH for 6 months.

What a childish dick. Tell him to fuck off & write a Mills & Boon.

You need to ask him what he means exactly. Does he mean "star crossed" () as in if things were different, they'd be together, or that they just share the same interests.
How did he say it? In a jokey way? Either way it is a bit of a shit thing to say.
Only 6 months in, so be prepared to cut your losses and leave him to it. Dick.

Cut your losses.
Tell him you want to meet YOUR kindred spirit so you are off as it clearly isn't him as you aren't his!
Job done!

6 months in?

He can (and should) fuck off.

Bin him off, you're worth much better.

But she isn't into him, she is married.
He says he loves you, well ask him if he understands how hurtful this is, and he is baying at the moon.

I'm a man who has a female best friend. Known each other for years and years. We've never dated, never kissed, never will.

But I would say she is my kindred spirit. We met doing a hobby and hit it off immediately. We discovered that we have the same favourite place - not a country, not a town, but an historic house (and not a well known one). We always know what the other is thinking in any situation. We have been known to finish each other's sentences. We have always been each other's "go to" person when the shit hits the fan (when not in a relationship). There are things she knows that only two other people in the world know about stuff that happened to me in the past. We socialise separately and we have socialised with our partners when we weren't single.

All our mutual friends call us "the twins" and we ourselves said years ago that it is like we should have been twins, but we were born three years apart to different parents, although if someone came along and said to one of us "you were adopted and they really are your sibling" it would somehow make perfect sense.

Do I fancy her? No. Does she fancy me? No. Does what I have with her feel anything like when I have been in an 11-year long term relationship? No.

My oldest friend is female, known her 45 of my 48 years. I wouldn't necessarily say kindred spirts but its bloody close.

Thankfully my wife and her husband have never ever had an issue. He even jokes about leaving is to it if we havnt seen each other for ages. But then they both know if we had wanted to be together they would never have even been om the scene!

See, OP, you are a lovely individual who's self-doubting now.

So why is he with you/not her?

Please leave. You are important. And deserve to be loved fully and to be considered someone's soulmate.

The only person who can use kindred spirit is Anne of Green Gables.

I'm not so sure I'd freak out at that...I guess it depends on your relationship. I would see a kindred spirit as someone who connects in many ways but not sexually. My current DP has said similar about an ex of his but I know they basically had zero sex life as they ended up feeling like brother and sister, I didn't feel threatened by it all as we have amazing sexual chemistry and connection.