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Original poster

Would this bother you?

65 replies

Tidygirldml · 22/08/2017 15:20

Fairly new relationship

Party at friends, all a few to drink, new partner kisses hostess on the lips when we leave. Not a snog, just a firm kiss on the lips.

He says it is nothing in it, meant by it, me I went ballistic.

Am I over reacting?

How would you feel?

OP posts:
AdalindSchade · 22/08/2017 16:18

So surprised at the first responses! Of course it's weird. However in s new relationship I'd probably just dump the weirdo

CupOfTeaAndABourbon · 22/08/2017 16:20

This would bother me. Kissing on the lips is incredibly intimate. Most sex workers won't do kissing as it can be more intimate than the sex itself.

There was a great BBC World service documentary about it recently here

It wouldn't bother me because of trust issues (I completely trust DH) but because it's such an act of intimacy for me.

BusterGonad · 22/08/2017 16:45

Just to add, I don't know anyone that does this, my husband would never do this as he hates even the cheek kisses he gets and feels he has to reciprocate! But I know some people love to be over familiar!

Adora10 · 22/08/2017 16:49

Never and know nobody who does this, a kiss on the lips is pretty intimate, it's nothing like a cheek kiss; I'd be mad and embarrassed by him.

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 22/08/2017 16:51

He says it is nothing in it, meant by it, me I went ballistic.

Wow way OTT.

Some people are lip kissers some aren't.

ThierryEnnui · 22/08/2017 16:52

WTF? Normal? No it's not. Even if there wasn't "anything in it" it's still bloody weird and a bit gross.

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 22/08/2017 16:53

WTF? Normal? No it's not.

Even if to you it isn't 'normal'. For the OP to go ballistic is a ridiculous over reaction.

ImperialBlether · 22/08/2017 17:00

Oh come on, of course this is not normal. Virtually everyone reserves kisses on the mouth for intimate relationships. Some will kiss their children on the mouth when they're young but stop at a certain age, while other adults kiss their parents on the mouth.

But this woman isn't in any relationship with the OP's boyfriend - why would she want him to kiss her on the mouth? If this happened to any of my friends their response would be either "Blimey, he's a bit over-friendly, isn't he?" or a quick wipe of their mouth and "Ugh, wish he hadn't done that."

Adora10 · 22/08/2017 17:05

And the fact it was a party and everyone drinking I presume just makes it even more gross; normal, normal if you don't mind you partner being called a sleaze I guess.

Bumbumtaloo · 22/08/2017 17:14

I wouldn't like it at all, but honestly I wouldn't go ballistic and I would not be impressed if my (now) DH went ballistic at me either.

Original poster
Tidygirldml · 22/08/2017 17:16

Well maybe 'ballistiic' was a bit of an over statement, however I made it clear that I was not happy xx

OP posts:
loveyoutothemoon · 22/08/2017 17:16

Over reaction!

McCunty · 22/08/2017 17:18

It would bother me!

gingertigercat · 22/08/2017 17:29

Depends on context i.e. Whether it was a greeting/goodbye and whether hes like that to everyone after a few or whether he just necked her on the random.

LesisMiserable · 22/08/2017 17:35

Maybe it was an accident. I accidentally kissed my DH's 90 year old nan square on the lips at weekend - it wasnt by choice, I was aiming for the cheek but there we go. Live to squirm about it another day Grin

FeedMeAndTellMeImPretty · 22/08/2017 17:42

Wtf?! Some people are really ok with this?! ShockConfused

I don't know what 'ballistic' constitutes but I'd be fuming if I saw my DP do this.

Annoys me enough when I see him kissing anyone on the cheek Blush or kissing his kids on the lips. I find that a bit odd as we are not lip kissers in our family and it's very intimate to me - something only partners do.

Kissing a friend on the lips is very intimate and I'd feel really uncomfortable seeing DP do that. If it was just one particular person and not everyone, I'd be concerned about the level of closeness.

Either way I'd ask him not to. I wouldn't want to kiss him knowing his lips had someone else on them!

SandyY2K · 22/08/2017 17:47

I wouldn't be pleased about it, but I'd wait and see if this was a frequent occurrence.

If it was I'd remove myself from the relationship without any drama.

RebornSlippy · 22/08/2017 17:52

Jesus, calm down! It was probably a drunken Mwha, thanks for a good night, smacker on the lips. Hardly the sensual 'kiss' as some of you are imagining. I bet they even said 'mwha' as they did it.

Tell us more, OP. Why has this rattled your cage so much? Was it more intimate that I imagine it to be? Does he have form? Do you have issues with this woman?

ptumbi · 22/08/2017 17:53

Um, my DP kisses his mother and his sister on the lips as a hello/goodbye.

I thought it strange at first but it's their normal.

Ttbb · 22/08/2017 17:56

It would bother me in that I find it really weird and I would be really paranoid about him trying to do that to my father for example. But I wouldn't be upset.

Barbaro · 22/08/2017 20:16

I find it weird so many people think a partner kissing someone else for any reason is OK.

You aren't being unreasonable. I would have dumped him there and then, wouldn't wait for an explanation.

Moomin80 · 22/08/2017 20:25

Yes it's creepy. My friends bf does this even to his 70 yr old aunt ShockConfused

Maddogs · 22/08/2017 20:26

I kiss friends and family on the lips. Oh dear am I weird? Blush

PigletWasPoohsFriend · 22/08/2017 20:31

I find it weird so many people think a partner kissing someone else for any reason is OK.

Gosh how dare people have a different view to you.

AnyFucker · 22/08/2017 20:34

Is his name Jason ?