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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Abused Or Abuser

56 replies

Howdydoodee · 15/08/2017 14:08

Just that really? Have you ever wondered if you are the abuser or the abused?

OP posts:
HensAndRabbits · 19/08/2017 10:12

I bumped into a girl I was friends with at school last year. We got chatting and she asked me if I was going to apologise for the way I treated her. I was confused and she told me that I'd bullied her continuously throughout secondary school. I asked her for examples and she gave me a couple - I said she looked Chinese and asked if she was adopted, and also told her she wasn't good enough to join the netball team.

I remember asking her if she was adopted because her parents are both blonde hair, blue eyes and she definitely looks oriental. Not particularly tactful but I was a teenager. Also I remember her considering trying out for the netball team, she was hugely unsporty and I probably did tell her she wouldn't get a place.

In her head I bullied her for years, in my head we were really close friends. Maybe I have misremembered as much as she did and it's somewhere in the middle. I just got the feeling she'd almost defined herself as someone who had been bullied for years.

I've been wondering ever since if I am in fact an awful person and I've just been editing my memories to make myself a good guy.

MeMeMeMe123 · 19/08/2017 12:08

hens - i think you are being hard on yourself. Im a little bewildered at what your old schoolmate hoped to gain from YOUR apology.

I rather think it says more about her than you if she has held onto it for so long. I think its healthy to reflect though and keep oneself in check.

For me - it shows that words can and do hurt and cut deep. HOwever that awareness is low when you're a teen ....

StaplesCorner · 19/08/2017 13:11

Hens that's funny you should mention that as I was on an old school Facebook page last night, I am in my 50s now, and a mutual friend lets call her A was contacted on the open messages by another woman, B.

B said " oo do you remember me?!" smiley face etc and A said yes of course I do. It was all I could do not to butt in and say yeah and I definitely remember you you fucking bully, this woman and her little group treated me like dirt for 5 years my mum even died during that period and she just continued. If I couldn't give specific examples, she'd still be bully. I bet she would say the same as you. We have other mutual friends and they remember things differently too - we've talked about this and it does seem that school memories stay with different people in different ways.

To the bully what they said was just a joke, harmless teenage fun, or an offhand comment. But to the person on the receiving end it could be devastating. I think Me is right when she says "awareness is low when you're a teen".

Both my DDs have been bullied in school, my eldest is 16 and left the school in question 2 years ago but if she sees the girls responsible in the street she has a panic attack. Where Me and I differ is where she says "it says more about her than you if she held onto it for so long". That attitude helps bullies to prosper.

No you probably weren't and certainly aren't an awful person, but you clearly hurt that teenage girl's feelings and no one can tell her that she's not allowed to feel like that, or that she's somehow less of a person because she was upset. Its an interesting example and I am glad you raised it. I don't think its in the same vein as the controlling partners being discussed on this thread - is it another side of the same coin so as to speak?

StaplesCorner · 19/08/2017 13:13

"We have other mutual friends and they remember things differently too" - sorry just to clarify, my old school friends and I have talked about how odd it is that we all remember things about school in general differently, not my being bullied.

MeMeMeMe123 · 19/08/2017 14:07

staples I have been horrifically bullied, all my life. By teens and adults alike.

Letting it go doesn't help them prosper. It helps me move on. I don't ever forget though.

I couldn't reason with the bullies, so I stopped trying.

My statements are never written in absolute terms. You'll see I wrote i rather think and I stand by that. It's not about the bullied person being bad/petty etc. It was referencing their wanting an apology.

I'm sorry it came across that way to you.

MeMeMeMe123 · 19/08/2017 14:11

I'm sorry to read about your Dd's. That must be heartbreaking.

I'll bow out now..

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