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Original poster

How would you feel after this conversation?

35 replies

honestjohnest · 08/08/2017 18:42

BIL (Dh's brother) is going through an acrimonious divorce. BIL is a serial cheat, so all fault lies with him. DH's family and we are trying to do everything to support everybody and get the best outcome for our nieces and nephews..

Today I was preparing for a family event with our (mine and DH's) DC at PIL's house. DH and BIL were not there and were at work. MIL's "best friend" corners me in the kitchen and says she is "so sorry" that our family are going through this turmoil and that she "always knew" BIL was a "playboy." I said yes it's very sad etc.

MIL's best friend then goes on to say that she caught BIL having sex a few years ago with a random woman in PIL's family house and that's when she knew that BIL and SIL's marriage was probably over . I wasn't surprised but thought it was a bit weird her telling me this as we do not know each other that well.

Then she said "well your DH is a bit of a playboy too isn't he? Or WAS." I laughed and said "yes probably! But it's all in the past..." Then she said "I remember he thought no one was in the house but I was here clearing up in the kitchen after a party and he was trying to sneak a woman in. He had lipstick all over his shirt and he was all sweaty."

I laughed again, and she said "I can't remember when it was? Perhaps 2010 (before we met) or maybe it was 2012 (we were married) or 2013."

I laughed again. She said "Do you ever worry the same thing will happen to you?" I said "Well I don't think you can ever be 100% that someone is faithful to you, as it is just never possible to know and you could drive yourself mad knowing. But trust is good, and DH and I have trust."

And she said "I'm think your DH will be faithful," I said "I hope so!" and left it.

How would you feel after this conversation?

OP posts:
Mrscropley · 08/08/2017 18:44

That she loves a good gossip.

Smile and ignore. .

Standstilling · 08/08/2017 18:45

That she is a shit-stirring harpie

kaitlinktm · 08/08/2017 18:45

I would be irritated.

flapjackfairy · 08/08/2017 18:46

Well hacked off firstly at her front !
She sounds a gossip who loves to stir it so i would want a lot more info before panicking!
Any cause to doubt dh at all ?

Anecdoche · 08/08/2017 18:47

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Mysteriouscurle · 08/08/2017 20:52

I would avoid her forever more, nasty shit stirrer. Seriously who says shit like that

ImperialBlether · 08/08/2017 20:56

I think you should have tackled it differently and said outright, "Are you telling me my husband's been unfaithful to me?"

Hassled · 08/08/2017 20:57

Do you think she was aware as she was saying all this that if it had been 2012/13 you would have been married to your DH? She does sound like a hideous gossip - and you asked how we'd feel; I think I'd feel a bit flummoxed and probably quite angry. Hope you're OK.

FluffyWhiteSlippers · 08/08/2017 21:00

I'd have to ask DH.

Grooves · 08/08/2017 22:39

Just a busy body.

My partners friend is like that, loves drama. She shit stirs like fuck.

Just take it as sad life gossip. Don't worry about it.

FelixtheMouse · 08/08/2017 22:43

Woman could stir shit for England. Ignore the trouble making cow.

Justmuddlingalong · 08/08/2017 22:49

I'd bring the conversation up in front of her and MIL. 'Gossiping Gertie was saying xy and z, what do you think MIL?' Play the nasty bitch at her own game.

NotAnotherNoughtiesTune · 08/08/2017 22:50

Shit stirring.

It's hardly like she knows you well.

She wants to see more drama.

SleepFreeZone · 08/08/2017 22:56

I would he relaying the conversation back to my husband abd watching his face closely.

NanooCov · 08/08/2017 22:59

I'd think the reference to sweaty male with lipstick on his shirt trying to sneak female in to the house was referring to BIL again, not your DH?

Syc4moreTrees · 08/08/2017 23:03

nanoo I read it how you did.

Butterymuffin · 08/08/2017 23:10

Utterly weird story from her. For any of it to be true she'd have to spend loads of time there with your PILs busy with other things. Sounds like one of those people who love to make out to others they know lots when they don't. And was trying to cause trouble with all the 'remembering' of dates. Don't give her the satisfaction.

schoolgaterebel · 09/08/2017 00:01

She's loving the drama

Ignore her

pameladoove · 09/08/2017 00:05

I think she was trying to tell you he's been unfaithful. Dig deeper.

PointlessUsername · 09/08/2017 00:11

Sounds like a shit stirrer.

If you have no others reasons to distrust DH i wouldnt worry.
Have you told DH what she said?

Aquamarine1029 · 09/08/2017 00:11

She sounds like a gossipy fat-mouthed cow.

Casmama · 09/08/2017 00:14

Either she has an uncanny knack for being around when illicit sex is going on or she is shit stirring.
I would imagine there is some basis in truth but that what she said is so exaggerated as to be unrecognisable.
I would still discuss it with your DH but I certainly wouldn't go in all guns blazing as he is likely to be innocent imho

Gooseberrycrumble4 · 09/08/2017 00:18

I'd probably have a heart to heart with DH and tell him what she said

The likelihood is that it's more years then she thinks. So she thinks 2013, could really be 2010.

schoolgaterebel · 09/08/2017 00:28

She caught BIL being unfaithful and also caught your DH sneaking a woman in (maybe 2010 or possibly 2013) what a coincidence.

SabineUndine · 09/08/2017 00:37

She's a shit-stirring cow and getting off on the drama. I'd ignore her.

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