I cheated on my partner with his best friend and just told him

[ivyrose10]

I know I deserve it but I'm coming here just to be called a cunt. I guess Im just reaching out for someone who may have been in the same situation at some point.

My boyfriend and I have a 2 year old daughter, we have a house (mortgage in his name), we've been together just over 3 years and we have the same group of friends.

I haven't been happy and in love with my boyfriend for over a year. He is a good person, a great dad, he is my best friend but I am not in love with him romantically, our relationship happened way too fast.

Rather than working through our problems or just telling him I wasn't happy, after turning to his friend of 14 years (who was also my friend of 5 years) for emotional support one thing led to another and I thought I had feeling for him. I never slept with him but kissed him on several occasions and would secretly talk to him behind my boyfriend's back.

The guilt has been eating away at me for months now and last night I told my boyfriend the truth. He is obviously heartbroken but has said he wants to be with me but I need to make a bit change so he can trust me again.

I honestly don't know if I want to be with him or not. I can't believe what I've done to him and why he hasn't gone completely mad (I assume for our daughters sake maybe).

I have no where to go if we were to break up no family I could stop with and I can't bare the thought of My girl not seeing her dad as often as she does.

I think I cheated because I was confused and this lad showed me attention where my boyfriend didn't. I'm weak and pathetic.

I think we both just want what's best for our daughter but I don't know what the best way to move forward is or what I want.

Has anybody been through similar? I know how out of order I have been, believe it or not it's completely out of character for me. Our friends are hurt that we could do this to him but to my surprise have all been very supportive

Well no you weren't taken advantage of. You went to the other guy. He didn't come to you. You played on his feelings for you just as much as he played on yours for him. You cheated, because you wanted to, end of story.

However if you are now going to make a go of it again with your partner, you actually need to try and show you are sorry to him for betraying his trust. Don't see the other guy again obviously or talk to him or text him or communicate in any way. You are going to have to earn your partners trust back and it won't be easy. But you can't just go off to another guy if it gets hard again. Leave the guy if that's the case, he deserves far better than you to continue messing him about. Make a choice and stick to it.

It was me who asked about PND, not the OP "playing the PND card." Disgraceful phrase.

A lot of moral crusaders who seem to forget that OP is just 23. Damned if I had it all figured out at that age. But I also was struggling with a baby then, either.

I think OP should be treated kindly.

I think you will need to split. It's fairer to both of you. I know there's no easy age for children when parents separate so if not now when? When she's five and just starting school? 7? 10? 15? You can work on making it amicable and still be brilliant parents. Don't beat yourself up forever. We all make mistakes. The brave thing is to put them right.

You were not taken advantage of. You cheated on him. Let’s get that right.

Your partner must have the heart of a saint to want to trust you again - cheaters very rarely change. What if you get bored of him in a year - some other bloke then?

Zombie thread

@serialcheat This thread is a year old.

Hopefully, her boyfriend has found happiness with someone else, and she's stuck with the snake.