Date tomorrow and freaking out

[EElisavetaOfBelsornia]

I have a date tomorrow. The first one since leaving my abusive STBXH a year ago. I wasn't really looking to date, it's an old friend who I think has always had a bit of a crush on me and for the first time we are both single.

I was looking forward to it, but now it's looming I am panicking. I am unfit and flabby round the middle, my hair needs doing, I have scars on my face from STBXH's violence. What was I thinking of, agreeing to a date? I should cancel and just stay at home, look after my DCs and die single shouldn't I?

Go and enjoy yourself @EElisavetaOfBelsornia .i am sure he won't mind

No! Go out and enjoy!

Hey don't cancel. Deep breaths, it's not a blind date, he's a friend. He sounds nice. Don't put any pressure on yourself. It's just one date. Have a lovely time

Nope.

Assuming he has seen you in the last few years he knows what you look like!!!!!!

Its not like old where you can use a 15 year old photo and hope for the best.

Its the scars you cant see that are probably holding you back.

Go for it and be happy

He is nice. He knows my history in a lot of detail and still seems to fancy me. Is it really possible to have a successful relationship after this degree of baggage though?

Baggage has a habbit of getting lost!!!

If he is decent, as you say, he will work with it and then one day you'll realise it isnt baggage anymore!

I bet he's super nervous too.

Don't do what ifs, carpe diem!

Ok, you're right. Go with it, no pressure. It's just meeting for a drink, isn't it.

My other worry is that my track record indicates that I'm not great at identifying red flags early enough on, but maybe I can run things past you on here if it gets to that point?

Well, I didn't cancel, and I'm on my way now. Feeling very nervous.

So exciting! Good luck, have fun! Don't be overly concerned about looking out for red flags it's your first date just enjoy yourself! . He obviously fancies you so dont over think it just let him fancy you and show you some attention! You sound like you deserve some fun!!!!

Here's to you having the first of many dates op.

Good luck, hope all goes well and you manage to relax .

Well done op... Delighted you went

👍
Relax and enjoy.

Exciting!!!!

Update: well I'm very, very pleased you all told me to go. It went very well, and there was kissing. We don't live close to each other, and both have children - and our free weekends don't coincide! So it will be a little while before the next date, but I think it's quite good to be forced to take it slowly, I will have time to decide it's what I want, and still have my independence and space. That said, I hope it won't be too long until the next time, I had a lovely time. Thank you for telling me to go through with it, it was the right decision!

I'm so happy for you and very proud you decided to go! Take it slow and who knows! He might end up being a wonderful addition to your life.

That's fantastic, well done
Although... Kissing? On a first date?

Fabulous! Yes take it slowly, sounds great

That was me taking it slowly scruffy However I have known him over 10 years, so it was only a first date .

Thank you all

ElisavetaofBelsornia,
Are you a "Chalet School " fan?

How did you guess IvysMum?

I've read every one - in fact, I have every one several times. My mother collected them, and left me all her books when she died. Princess at the Chalet School is one of my favourites.

Have read every one I mean.

That's amazing. Good for You!! I'm glad you went and enjoyed yourself! :)