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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

My DH has walked out and I am devastated

38 replies

Tearsofthemushroom · 20/07/2017 10:54

I just don't know how to go on. He told me yesterday morning that he was leaving me. Out of the blue. We have an 8 and 10 year old and have been together for 22 years. He was/is my soul mate and best friend.

He told me he doesn't love me any more but he does care for me. Also he had a one night stand a few weeks ago and he didn't feel guilty afterwards, which seems to be what has triggered him leaving.
He has gone until Saturday he said, please tell me that there is a chance we can come back from this.
I have suggested that we try counselling but I don't know if it is too late.

What do I do?
Please help me, the children are devastated and so am I.

OP posts:
TorchesTorches · 20/07/2017 10:59

Really sorry that this has happened. Hand hold until someone more experienced comes along, but i feel for you, if this happened to me i too would be devastated. Take care of yourself. Remember to eat and drink.

Mrskeats · 20/07/2017 11:01

Oh dear sorry to hear this.
How come the children know already?
First thing is to seek some real life support?
Hugs Flowers

Loopytiles · 20/07/2017 11:05

Very sorry. He has an OW. Please read up on "the script" and the "pick me dance" and seek a good lawyer. Go through financial documents and take copies.

Best chance of getting him back (if by then you actually want him) is actually to act as though the relationship is permanently over because of his infidelity and to progress with him living elsewhere financial separation. Remove yourself as an option for him.

Offred · 20/07/2017 11:34

I'm really sorry, this is shitty.

I know it feels like the answer to this devastation is to try and cling onto him and it is totally natural when you have had your whole life exploded in this way but IMO the only way for you to get back to happiness is to let him go, not have contact with him unless it is about the kids and necessary and to try and take care of yourself. Get to know yourself outside your relationship with him.

Xxx

MavisFlumpTheFairy · 20/07/2017 11:39

Shitty bastard.
So there's an OW, that would be it for me.
I'd be telling him he's not coming back Saturday; get legal advice and lean on friends for support op.

Adora10 · 20/07/2017 11:42

Awful but I'd guess OW too. He'd not be coming back into my home after having sex with OW and is obviously still seeing her.

Kr1stina · 20/07/2017 11:51

Phone a RL friend or relative who can come over today to support you.

Phone some school mums who can have your kids over for a play date.

Tell your H he's not coming back to the family home andhe needs to sort out alternative accommodation quickly as the kids are coming to stay with him next weekend.

This weekend he can pick them up and take them out for the day.

Of course you can and WILL go on. This is just the shock and it will pass in a few days. Keep eating and drinking and talking to your RL supporters as well as us.

DONT contact your H except to discuss seeing the kids. DONT Try to talk about your relationship because it won't work.

I'm so sorry.

hellsbellsmelons · 20/07/2017 12:03

Wow - are you OK with him shagging other women?
Why do you want counselling together?
Please don't go to counselling together yet.
It's way too raw for you.
Counselling on your own would be good though.

Please don't do the 'pick me' dance.
It lessens any respect he might have had for you.
Which is clearly very little if he can shag other women and not feel any guilt.
No begging him to come home.
Cold and distant for now until you know what you want to do.

All cheaters minimise.
Don't believe for 1 minute it's a one night stand.
There is OW who's been around for a while.

He's following the script pretty much to the letter right now.
Get some real life support around you.
As much as possible.
Do NOT keep his dirty secret to protect him.
That was my very biggest regret.
If you don't want it to be public knowledge just yet then get a close, non judgy, friend to talk to.

Consider all your options here.
Don't just think you need to fix this.
You cannot fix this on your own.

Look after yourself. Eat and drink what you can.

It's a truly crap time but your family and friends will help you through it.

Google
Hysterical bonding
Pick me dance
Baggage reclaim
The script

Mari50 · 20/07/2017 12:08

There is another woman.
Don't do the pick me dance. Even if you decide you want to work at the relationship and stay together, don't do the pick me dance. Have some respect for yourself and don't let him walk all over you while he thinksnhe can have his cake and eat it.
See a solicitor.

WellWhoKnew · 20/07/2017 12:25

Hello! It is truly devastating when this happens - I know first hand.

First things first...tell everyone. I mean everyone....don't keep this a secret. You will find friends, new friends, in the most unexpected places. They will be your life line. I didn't tell a soul for ten days and suffered hugely for it. Once I did, how people rallied around was awe-inspiring.

You're not going to get over 22 years in a heartbeat, and you're going to be harking back to happier times and pondering "why?" and "what could/should I have done differently?"' You're also going to speak many an angst ridden hour wondering what's wrong with you.

The BEST advice I ever came across was: There's nothing wrong with you, what's wrong is what's happened to you". I read it here on MN, and it's true.

There's plenty wrong with a person who simply walks out without a backward glance.

There's zero, and I mean this, zero point asking him why. You'll be gaslighted, lied to, personally attacked and left even more perplexed if you do. As best you can get contact down to a minimum...dates/times for collecting the children. That's all. Never answer an email/text in the first 24 hours unless you have to.

Your self-esteem is obliterated but they'll have been eroding it for a long time before you realised. Do absolutely anything you can think of to repair it. I did courses (including Women's Aid Freedom programme) I learnt to drive, and got counselling and I talked and talked and talked.

You're going to feel physical pain, struggle with coping for more than 5 mins at a time, lose a stack of weight, and suffer with vivid dreams and disrupted sleep. "This too shall pass" is a good mantra. Eat little and often. Ice-cream, mushy food, chocolate whatever. Don't drown yourself in a vat of wine (I did!)

I truly would not wish this on anyone, I always believed that people who divorce "saw it coming" or somehow made a decision together. I didn't.

The only self-help book I found useful (and believe me I read a lot) was Runaway Husbands by Vicky Stark. The emphasis is on you, not him, as indeed it should be.

Someone on here will be able to help you sort out child maintenance, tax credits etc because it's not unusual to get cut off financially: adding insult to injury!

There's no miracle cure for a broken heart at all. But long after the event, what women I know this happened to regret most is having begged. So don't beg. As someone said above: pretend to all intents and purposes you are managing fine with out him.

None of the women I met along the way believed we would survive it, but we mostly have. The hardest time is about four to six months after he left, when friends and family have gotten used to it - you, of course, are just starting to face up to the reality of it. Depression really kicks in then. Get counselling/take meds/do whatever you can to get through each day. Usually the divorce starts about then too....

I have recently been diagnosed with PTSD. This is 3 years after he left (May 2014) and a brutal divorce which finish ten months later. Four court appearances just about finished me off. I never knew the man I married. So I for one do not underestimate just how shocking an event this is.

That said, my life is very different now. I can see he and I were very dysfunctional. I am glad he's out of my life - despite rearing his ugly head here and there, I am starting to feel happy again. I have a new sense of freedom, great friends and hope for the future has returned. I laugh A LOT. I have hobbies again. A social life. I'm settled in my home. I truly believed my life was over when he left. I was very wrong about that - it's just the biggest nemesis is time.

You will heal.

heather19771210 · 20/07/2017 12:44

Oh sweetie, there's some really good advice on here. I'm in the same boat (second time same H) and I was given evidence by a third party of an affair on Monday coming out of my job.
Be assured there is probably an OW so brace yourself. Concentrate on your kids and you. For the first two days I frantically and desperately wanted to confront the OW but I'm disturbed enough by what I do know so you don't need that.
Try and eat, a bite of food hasn't passed my lips since Monday morning but don't be like me. Get a support network around you and get legal advice. I've been with my H for 24 years since I was 15. In now undergoing full std testing and it's humiliating but liars are liars and don't believe any thing they tell u. If your feeing really down speak up. You have to your DC need at least one decent parent. He will say he has always put your DC first, bullshit. He will try to blame you, bullshit.
Stay strong. I'll talk to you anytime. I know what you are going through

Adora10 · 20/07/2017 12:45

Great post Heather

hellsbellsmelons · 20/07/2017 12:45

Great post WellWhoKnew
So glad to see things are on the up for you.

Adora10 · 20/07/2017 12:46

Sorry I mean WhoKnew!

PearlyPinkNails · 20/07/2017 12:47

You might be feeling devastated now but this guy is a prick. You'll be ok, some great posts on here

Areallmencheats · 20/07/2017 13:06

So sorry this is happening to you OP. I am in the same boat. My husband of 25 years left me and our two teenage sons in March. There were no signs. No arguments. He didn't discuss it. He just left and moved in with the other woman (a work colleague) straight away.

He has changed completely. He is selfish and entitled. He can't speak to me, only shout. He doesn't want to see our sons. He's moved over eighty miles away to be with her and they can't visit him. He is fighting over money. He is in the process of setting up a separation agreement and wants to divorce. He has completely assassinated my character to whoever will listen. He has totally rewritten our history. He says he hates me.

He used to be a loving husband and father. Nothing was too much trouble for his family. Now he would be more than happy to never bother with us again.

Our sons are totally heartbroken and bewildered. Our eldest insists of meeting up with him every week and is trying to get answers but his dad, who he always idolised, lies to him and gaslights him.
Our youngest son (who was just about to take his A levels when his dad left) has completely blocked him.
It is so sad and painful to see.

Unbelievable as it is he is not the man you remember. Protect yourself and your children. I never would have believed he could treat us this way.
As others have said, get a solicitor, get hold of bank statements etc.
Read self help books (try Chump Lady), watch box sets (comedies), meet up with friends and family and talk. It really helps. Get counselling if you need it.
I am still heart broken. He is carrying on with his life and his new family (two more boys aged 10 and 13!!). He must have been having an affair and carrying on for months. She has also left her husband after sixteen months of marriage (second divorce for her and she's only 41 so doesn't bode well for the future).
Time is the only thing which will help us to come to terms with this.
Good luck x.

26milesofcbeebies · 20/07/2017 14:26

Have you got a friend or relative who can come round and keep you company and help with the children? Make sure their routine can be kept going so that they feel as secure as possible, given what's going on.

Start looking at the finances, gather all bills and paper work etc so that you can get a clear idea of where you stand currently. You don't want to get into a financial hole if you can avoid it. Is there someone who can help with this?

What is your h's plan for Saturday? - you say he's away until then.

The free 30 minute solicitor appointment will be helpful when you have an idea of the current financial situation.

Counselling can be helpful to negotiate the split and work out a new way of parenting when you're no longer married. Don't rush into it though, and unless your h makes it clear that he wants to try and reconcile, you can't do it hoping that he might change his mind.

I'm not sure how helpful the numerous assertions of an OW are, or that the OP will never get answers. He's said he had a ONS, with no regrets, and no longer loves her... that's brutal, but pretty clear cut to me. Not sure what else she needs to know.

The main thing, I think, OP is to get some real life support in this immediate period. Look after yourself and have courage.

Tearsofthemushroom · 22/07/2017 12:10

Thank you for all of your wise words. I went to see him to talk things over and he has agreed to come home and try to work things through. I felt a massive sense of relief when I realised that we still had a chance together although we obviously have a huge amount to work through. He says our relationship has died over the past couple of years and having been able to step back slightly over the past couple of days I think that he is right. I have been going through the menapause and I am not the same person I used to be. I am very unhappy in myself and had withdrawn from everything and self medicated with food and alcohol. He has said several times over this period that he was unhappy but each time I glossed over it as a temporary thing.
I do believe that he has always been faithful up until now and that this was an act of desperation.
How could we not try to fix things. When they are right between us they are amazing. I did go to my friends who were all gobsmacked that it was me going through this. I don't know if he would have come back if not for the kids but I have said that the relationship has to work on its own account.
I am going to work on myself, this can only be a positive thing, even if we don't work out in the long term, I need to make myself like me again I think.

OP posts:
Cary2012 · 22/07/2017 12:26

Oh dear
I wish you luck OP and lots of it.

BastardGoDarkly · 22/07/2017 12:29

Ah, i truly hope it works out for you love.

You know where we are Flowers

chips4teaplease · 22/07/2017 12:34

Fingers crossed for you.

Meanwhile, quietly get your ducks in a row for when in case it doesn't work out. Bear in mind that 'one night stand' might well have been more.

I know you want to hope and try. I know how that feels. Good luck.

Beelzebop · 22/07/2017 12:46

Good luck to you, I have to admit that I would never be able to trust a man who said he didn't feel guilty about a one night stand. I'm so sorry to be blunt, but won't you always feel like you're just hanging on to him? Xxx

Tearsofthemushroom · 22/07/2017 13:13

At the moment I am hanging on to him, I am just hoping that he will start hanging on back at some point. I know that I would not be able to keep up with a pretence of a relationship and I hope that I have enough will power to end it myself if that becomes the case. I google hysterical bonding and we are indeed at that point. But it feels good and reassuring that we still feel enough for each other and I need that physical closeness at the moment.

OP posts:
Sunnyshores · 22/07/2017 13:28

So he had an affair, he was unhappy, he wanted out - yet you have to change Confused.

I do sincerely hope you can find happiness

BastardGoDarkly · 22/07/2017 13:30

Something tells me the OW wasn't up for being properly together yet.

I'm sorry op, he was quite prepared to walk out on you and the children, now he ' feels enough for you' to try again?

Something stinks here.

Be wary, very wary.

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