The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Sweet, Summer Sobriety!

[Mouseface]

Hey, I'm Mouse

Welcome to the Battle Bus! We're a group of travelling drinkers of varying levels, those who are teetotal, and those who have tried so many times to stop, those are 'controlled' drinkers, but we NEVER give up and keep coming back for the support we share, and trying to get some kind of control over the Wicked Wine Bitch Witch!

It's not easy, boy, it's so not easy to stop or cut down some days. There are days when even the Bravest Babes fall into the Sidecar. And do you know what? That's okay.

There is NO judgey pants worn on this Bus and you don't have to be anyone other than YOU to join us

So, come and grab a seat, some Opal fruits, (it'll make sense eventually!)) and meet the rest of the Babes. Remember, you're not on your own, ever with us, you'll always have a Babe you can relate to.

Here's the last thread for you to catch up on if you like

And here's where the entire journey began.

Mouse xxx

Of course shockers just jump in. It's late though so might be quiet tonight. I need my bed but there's usually someone around.

Thank you. I was just going to sleep myself, but wanted to ask/placemark 😊

I've been on a sobriety thread before, a couple of years ago. I've drunk too much/ too often for over 30 years, but it hasn't caused me any major problems because I don't binge drink.

That said, if I open a bottle of wine, I finish it... and I open one most evenings. I have begun to have alcohol free days during the week, of late, because my job is such that I really can't be off my game. When I'm not drinking though, I'm irritable and I go to bed so I'm not impacting on the rest of the family.

My kids are in their teens and are beginning to vocalise how me not being around in the evenings makes them feel. I also know that whilst I feel relaxed and happy when I am drinking, I probably have less of a filter (my mother used to upset me a lot when she drank... and she drank every evening).

It's the summer holidays and I haven't drunk at all this week. I've wanted to, but I'm drinking loads of water and I'm going for walks in the evenings. I felt really terrible at the start of the week. I had diarrhoea, headaches, nausea and I was so irritable, my family were giving me a wide berth.

I don't want to be this person anymore. We're going to France for the rest of the holidays and I don't want to drink whilst I'm there. This will be difficult because we're meeting friends who are big drinkers. DH doesn't drink though, so I will be leaning on him more. He wants to help, so I'm hopeful.

I gave up for lent once, then started again... this time I want to succeed!

lux wonderful to hear you so happy. Of course you must stay on the bus, we need reformed old soaks to keel the rest of us right.
Welcome shockers. Not drinking all week is brilliant. You do feel a bit shit when you go AF to start with as the toxins leave your body, but it will get better.

Oh lux do stay on the bus!
It's brilliant that you feel much happier and free.
So I had a poor sleep, keeping dead busy today sorting house out, it's been a busy few months and I'm doing a declutter.
I have lost my way a bit, floundering.
Gained weight, still sort of moderating but with blips.
I do think routine helps me. Also I'm thinking again about the self care stuff and giving myself time.
When I need to sleep or relax or talk to someone about things, it's just easier to eat or have a drink and ignore those needs.
So, I am doing homemade CBT and doing positive actions and thoughts to hopefully get to positive feelings!

Thanks for being there babes on the bus

Also thinking of mouse hope you're okay.

Hey 42. Keep at it.sounds like youa are trying really hard. Well done.
I had one beer and felt sick so stopped. Recently its as if my body is trying to tell me that it doesnt want alcohol any more but my brain tells me I do because thats what I always do.
Havent done much today. Sick to death of the endless rain....

Epic failure to stay AF for the dinner party. Friends rolled up with beautiful champagne, and promises of "We'll buy you a Dry July pass card", and I caved. Had a very big night and am currently feeling sorry and disappointed in myself on the couch.

I was really looking forward to feeling proud of myself for doing a whole month AF but that just went out the window with the promise of drinking with friends. Back to day one.

It's back to Day one Lily but with the added experience that you are vulnerable in certain situations.
I am just reading last 2 weeks of posts no, and I see you posted about coping strategies. My experience comes too late, but could be useful in the future. Try to learn from every set back.

1. Tell people beforehand that you cannot drink. Just an email saying 'I cannot drink on Saturday night so please don't offer me drink'
2. Get you OH to back you up unconditionally
3. Know what you will be drinking. When people arrive have a soft drink in your hand already.
4. Get your OH or guests to pour their own drinks. Don't handle it. That limits temptation.
5. When you feel tired or get bored, go to bed. Do not stay up to make others feel comfortable. If they are drinking, they won't care if you are up in bed or round the table.
6. Set an alarm to yourself mid way through the evening so at a set time you get a few minutes quiet time to yourself to strengthen your resolve.

Onwards Lily. Perhaps August can be AF for you.

Great post neutrogena
One night drinking with friends at home also doesn't undo all the good work you've done this month lily

Great post Neutrogena, all really good advice. I find people's insistence that I drink with them quite rude to be honest, and if I permit myself to think 'pushing someone to behave in ways they don't want to is rude' rather than 'I'm so unreasonable to not drink at this social event' then it helps my internal narrative.

Lily agree that it's always hard to have a blip, but it doesn't undo the great achievements to date. Just step over it and carry on. Think of all the other nights that you didn't drink, and be kind to yourself.

Lux
It's so nice to hear how happy you are. I get a grin on my face when I see you post.

LilyMcClellan
You'll be ok. We all have setbacks occasionally. Try not to beat yourself up about it.

I have just realised I'm starting Day 20 AF

Not looking forward to work tonight. One of the bosses is a bully to the younger girls. Now he's trying it on me. I just look at him like and repeat under my breath, P.A.C. : People Are Cunts.
I'm still waiting on the outcome of the telephone interview I had. In fact, I'm going to call them tomorrow as my job submission still says under review. Fingers crossed for a good outcome.

Mint would you like me to come and kick the boss is the shins? I cannot bear bullies.

20 days, that's awesome

Very quiet on the bus at the moment. How is everyone? Am in bed with a cup of tea...

im lurking folks. not feeling brave or battling so not posted....ive not managed to stay alcohol free and feel crap.
gah.

Post anyway user. Just staying on the bus shows you are brave and battling

bless you. thank you so much. i need a bit of renewed vigour. and root beer.

im seriously worrying about my health and my inability to stop when i start.
im tired now an just want water. i will quit while im ahead. im not drunk. but i didnt stop when i wanted to either.

Have some water and get to bed. Quitting while you are ahead is aa positive step. Think how many times you havent managed to do that and be proud that tonight you have.

Thanks for the support, everyone, and those tips, Neutrogena.

The 'blip' has made me realize a few things, which I'll write about later, as just about to start work. It's hard for me to admit failures, as I have a real perfectionist mentality (which backfires periodically). I didn't want to post at all yesterday, just to slink off and ignore it. But I am trying to embrace/acknowledge that imperfection isn't a fatal flaw.

youre absolutely right. water for me and bed. quitting while ahead an no qualms about doing it.

How are you all today? I am having a glass of wine to celebrate a piece of very good news at work...which I cant share with you all yet because it is press embargoed! But it is a recognition of a lot of hard work so Im very happy...

Hurray ma! Great (secret) news!

Just posted this in chat, but wondered if you Babes had any advice?

Hoping for some inspiration! Single mum, working full time and given up alcohol. Finding myself at a loss for things to do to relax after kids go to bed. I study 2/3 evenings a week and kids stay up weekend evenings, but feel like I need something to fill my spare hours including when watching TV to keep busy, and get new hobbies to replace holding a glass of wine.

Never been very crafty but up for giving it a go, plus any other ideas welcome!

jigsaws or colouring books?

Origami? there is a Japanese legend that if you make 1000 origami cranes you will be granted a wish.....

Read? Yoga, crochet, online journal, pamper yourself, bake, enter competitions (I win quite a few) invite a friend over.

Hi everyone, I'm still annoyingly chipper and intrigued by ma's post, what is our powerful ally up to it wonder?

dementedma
Huzzah for secret news!

LuxuryWoman2017
Hes awful. I fantasize about boiling his head in the fryers.

Zorra
Get yourself over to the CFN thread's, it's on number 8 right now. That will kill a couple of days!
Thread 1 here.
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/am_i_being_unreasonable/2990400-New-neighbour-using-my-private-garden?pg=1

So, I rang HR of the telephone interview people yesterday as I still hadn't heard from them. They said I had really impressed them and that the hold up was the local branch trying to arrange a date for the face to face interviews . They said they should be able to let me know by the end of the week. So a waiting game still.

I'm considering going on the Scottish meet up on Saturday before work. Eeeek! Scary!