Best online dating sites?

[Cherryblossom200]

Hi there,

I'm a single parent and would love to meet someone, I've been single for a few years now and feel ready to dip my toe into the dating scene again!

In the past I've tried Tinder and Bumble (before becoming a mum) but I don't think I'll find my soul mate there

Ideally I'd like to try a site which doesn't cost anything (or very much) but I'm wondering if you tend to then get the oddballs 😝 Do people tend to just sign up to all of them?!

oscareyeballs - just watched the Ted Talk, nice ending!
In response to your questions.... Occasionally when a man mentions things in my profile it comes across as trying too hard. So I will also reply to the 'hey' messages as long as I like their main profile and it's obvious they are not just looking for a hook up. I actually prefer the initial messages to be short these days. I think if a woman doesn't reply after 2-3 messages she is not interested and I have blocked men who sent more. Being light-hearted and witty is attractive but then again it depends on what is on the main profile. Although don't listen to me, I've had no luck with OLD...yet!
Now off to add 'fun' to my profile...

I met my DP on Tinder! I did have a very stringent filtering system, but he's an absolute gem. I was hoping for a few dinner dates to get over a bad relationship but met someone amazing instead.

I think the OLD works best if you're avg/slim build. Anything else is glossed over.

Wonder if there are dating sites for larger ppl that AREN'T fetish sites....

Forwards, I don't think so. There are men out there that have preferences for different body types. Some will prefer petite, others will prefer average, some curvy, some a little more to love. There is someone for everyone out there and I firmly believe that. The trick is finding them!

Has anyone tried Inner Circle?

I disagree forward, I'm a curvy girl (sz 18) and my profile pictures didn't try to disguise that fact, and I got a fair bit of interest.

Forwards; people are attracted to what they're attracted to, most men prefer slimmer women but some prefer larger ones. If you have accurate photos up and are honest about yourself then people who like you will be interested.

Thanks you lot. Probably need to re-think my profile.
Glad to hear where it's worked out for some of you. Gives me hope!

I am average/slim (size 10) but I have been on POF for ages, all I get is 'hi sexy' type posts and people just looking for a hook up. I have now changed my setting to look for an older man as the younger ones seem to either want a hook up or someone to have their children. I don't think men neceseraly want a slim woman, I don't want a slim man (don't want obese either but I don't mind if the have a bit of extra weight).

I met my dp on tinder, tbh I found the blokes on there really respectful, witty and I had some genuinely interesting conversations. POF on the other hand, wow...

Same here Lovemusic33 seems like most men on pof are looking for a hook up, some more obvious than others.
Really owlmug? Maybe I should make the transfer

Laura9867 Thanks for the insight, I've not had any luck either but it all helps. I might have to rejoin The Facebook to give this Tinder thing a go

Male view here echoing Forwards: they're all shit. They're perhaps less shit if you live in a very large city.

ShatnersWig I'm half with you there - 2 guys I worked with found their partners on POF, one ended up having a kid with the girl he sent "wassup" as his first message to.

So obviously works for some and not others

Well I've been on POF now for a couple of days and well...not I'm impressed so far. But I haven't really being doing much work to be fair to search for guys, I've been letting them do all the work (because I'm too lazy too 😆) the guys all look they are single for a reason. Harsh I know. One or two guys I've struck up a conversation with who I thought seemed ok, but as soon as I mentioned my daughter (I put I have a child on my profile and even have one pic with me and her on there so as to avoid any surprises) they tend to disappear. I've avoided talking excessively about my child because I'm just trying to get to know them first, it was merely a mention about how my day was (obviously I'll bring up my daughter as she is a huge part of my life) and the guy disappeared after what seemed like a nice coversation.

The more I think about this the more I feel dating with a young child is going to be inpossible. I have people to look after my daughter whenever I want, that's not the issue. It's more trying to get someone who understands my life as a parent. The early mornings, the unexpected throwing up at night etc etc I can't see it happening tbh!

Get your kids picture off your profile! I immediately ignore any man I see with kids in the pictures. It is very off putting to normal, genuine people because it displays a lack of regard for their privacy and safety and makes them wonder why you're advertising them rather than yourself. You're going to appeal to the wrong types. And don't be a kiddie bore, beyond how many kids you have (they will want to know that) and how old (relevant for explaining why you need a babysitter), there's no need for anymore information.

I've never once had any man turn away because I have a child. Then again, they won't see my kid, know her name or anything about her until I have met and know them well.

If you want to appeal to appealing men then you have to be appealing. Your profile should be well written, mention your hobbies and interests, a bit about your character and what you're looking for.

You can tick the yes to kids box but no kiddie pictures, be honest that you have a kid but be private about your child and men will respect that because they will see you as a protective parent.

The standard you attract says a lot about you so if it's low, fix how you are presenting yourself.

Ok thanks, I'll take the photo off. I don't feel I was being a kiddie bore at all. I just told the truth about my day, that we had friends round with their children and had dinner together. Why should I lie? Should I instead of said I trekked through the Amazon in the morning followed a jumping out of a plane in the afternoon and now eating dinner by candle light on a rooftop restaurant? That was me 7 years ago, now my life is different and I want someone to love me for me. I still am very much an adventurer at heart but I can't pretend to be something I'm not.

I've deliberately chosen to use photos which show me doing the things I love, surfing, being outdoors etc. It's very much geared towards my hobbies and the type of person I am. The photos don't show boobs and bum out, I would hope they just are a good representation of who I am.

But I do take on board your comments. The problem I think is more the area I live in, the guys aren't really my type. I'm from London originally and moved to Essex a few years ago. Unfortunately Essex boys aren't my type.

Just say dinner with friends and ask them about their interests. Find things you have in common; reading, travel, gym, sports, ideas... Talk about those things, give them something they can reply to.

Don't give a pile of details about what you did during the day unless you were doing something very interesting. One short sentence "met with friends for dinner" and onto a general topic.

Outdoors pictures are good. OK Essex boys... Now I feel sorry for you. I'm sure they must have some normal people there though!!!!

Ok got it thank you 😁 Yes I do love Essex boys, they are great people but the majority just aren't for me. I've travelled abroad, lived abroad and specifically want to meet someone who enjoys being outdoors and by that I don't mean sitting with a beer on a Friday night in a beer garden😆 Maybe I'm just looking for something which doesn't exist

Your last post sounds great!!! That's what you need to emphasise in your profile and in messaging. Maybe you need to move, men where I am would love you.

There are lots of men who love well travelled outdoors women. Even in Essex... 😉 have you gone through the photos of men and sent a few messages... Be proactive, look for men like you and contact them!

Thanks! I think the fact that I am well travelled and love experiencing new cultures and experiences is sometimes half the problem. The guys just can't relate to me at all. I get bored of the conversation really quickly and they probably get bored of me too 😝 I'm being harsh though, the area I live in is great and a commuter town so there are a lot of guys who aren't from Essex who live here. The trouble is they are married.

The good ones are already taken or gay 😆

So now I've taken the photo off with me and my daughter I've been sent two emails from very hot guys 😆 Who are ten year younger than me 😱 They are similar to be in terms of loving the outdoors but waay to young for me!