Menopause misery?

[mumoseven]

My menopause began 3 years ago and it feels like as the hormones disappeared, I became a different person. I used to feel so much joy in the smallest of things - flowers, sunshine, the thought of holidays, fresh coffee, a new book to read. I wasn't a completely 'up' person, I have suffered depression at times, and my life hasn't been marvellous, but I was able to enjoy myself to the max when well. Now its like I have lost my mojo and everything is a bit shit. I was thinking on the way to work today what would cheer me up, and I can't even think of anything. A year ago I had cancer, and though I trounced it, I feel like what was the point of surviving when we're all going to die anyway. Which makes me feel guilty when I was so lucky.
Sorry to be such a whinger!
I can't be arsed to do anything I used to like, my friends invite me out and I go, but though I act cheerful, I'm really just dying to go home and get back into bed.
My life feels a waste, though my kids are great, my job is worthwhile, it all seems a bit pointless really.

I am on medication for anxiety and I've done counselling, which makes me cringe to hear the sound of my whinging voice going on and on, when so much horrid shit goes on in the world. Mindfulness and living in the moment makes me tired, because every moment is followed by another moment in which I feel nothing but disassociation with everything I used to enjoy.
Sorry.

mum

You have entered the menopause only after you have gone 12 months without a period, if you are over 50. It's 24 months if you are under 50. So, the menopause is never actually over it is the time of your life after your periods have definitely stopped.

NICE guidelines now state that women can continue on HRT for as long as they wish, under the guidance of a HCP. HRT has been shown to have huge benefits in protecting your heart and bones etc.

You don't necessarily feel crap if you stop. I know plenty of women who stopped with no problems.

MaQueen ...of the people who stop and didn't have problems, did they have awful menopause symptoms before they started HRT? Or did they go onto HRT for other reasons?

Anecdotal evidence has told me that HRT just postpones the symptoms, but I'm quite prepared to be told that's guff.

I started HRT (Elleste Duet 1mg) 4 weeks ago after visiting my GP for anxiety, tearfulness, mood swings and inability to concentrate. My relationships and inability to perform at work were being badly effected. Within a few days I felt a difference in how I feel. I no longer feel so overwhelmed by life. I don't know if it is a placebo but it seems to be working for me.

I already had a fairly healthy lifestyle but before going to the GP I had further improved my diet, almost cut out alcohol and caffeine, lost a few excess lbs, taken up meditation and increased my exercise. None of this had a noticeable impact.

I'm 54 and still have regular heavy periods with no hot flushes or similar. My GP was initially going to prescribe ADs but I asked to try HRT first - in line with NICE guidelines, I believe.

Now i just need to resolve the low ferritin caused by the heavy periods....

A bit of both zaphod. I know my Mum suffered terribly with mood swings/anxiety when she turned about 40 - but then had a surgical menopause and her symtpoms disappeared. She took HRT for a while afterwards, but then stopped when she was about 44? She had no problems stopping. Except she then went on to get osteoporosis young, and she has to take medication for atrial fibrillation.

I had to have a total hysterectomy (the whole lot came off) and was in medical menopause before that (medication used to stop the ovaries working). The menopause was awful and I went through some dark periods but since being on oestrogen only HRT I am back to my old self (better in fact).
My downers were so bad that I rang DH from work sobbing hysterically for absolutely no reason, I just burst in to tears. I was also very very angry and wanted to physically hurt people for incredibly minor reasons (stopped myself though!)
I can genuinely say the HRT made a vast improvement on my moods.

I have been on HRT for the last 10 years. I was having unbelievably heavy periods aged 55 and the doctor put me on it as I was also very depressed and generally out of sorts.
According to my Dsis I was being irrational and grumpy!
It was like magic, the heavy periods regulated, and my mood improved.
in 2015 I had two bouts of surgery and had to come off it and all these awful symptons set in (18 hot flushes in a 5 hour period).

I resumed HRT after 6 months, (I had no periods in that time) and I feel fine again.

I have an aunt aged 89 who still takes it, she leads a very active and useful life. I'm 65 have recently retired and want to enjoy my retirement, so hopefully I will be able to take it for the foreseeable.

Lovely to hear about your aunt!

Sorry it's taken so long to update!

Well it's been 3 weeks now and the difference has been amazing. Hot flushes seem to have stopped and night sweats much reduced (hoping they will stop soon too).

My mood has definitely improved and I'm feeling a bit more, ahem, perky!

I'm just annoyed I didn't do this 2 years ago tbh

Hi, just reading these old messages & feeling so fed up. I don’t know what is wrong with me but I just feel horrible all the time. I have pains in the top of my stomach especially when I go to bed, I think it’s indigestion but I feel so crappy. If it’s not that I get horrible palpitations which scare me so much. I’ve had ecg’s an echogram & heart monitor all ok but I still feel like I’m going to die.
I never look forward to anything & nothing makes me feel happy anymore. I’m 58 post menopausal & really don’t want to feel so horrible for the rest of my life!
I have a very understanding husband but he must get fed up of my constant moaning about how vile I feel.
My daughter lives in Australia & I hate the fact we can’t see her this year.
I take magnesium with zinc daily. Any suggestions how I can feel “normal” again??

@Tobyben17 I was on HRT for years. Came off it for about 4 years and started before Christmas to feel crap. Final straw was howling in the loos at work for no reason. Went to see my GP who promptly put me on Tibolone (form of HRT for older ladies) and got my life back within 4 weeks. You can apparently stay on it for years!

@bouncydog
Thank you so much for your reply. I will look at Tibolone right now & try & get a telephone consultation with my GP tomorrow.
If I can get it prescribed & start to feel normal again it will be wonderful
😀

@Tobyben17 hope it all works out for you. I’m early 60’s and feel so much better.