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Original poster

Is he right

38 replies

user1466108618 · 06/06/2017 23:09

Tonight dp came home from work and i was making the dinner so he starts groping me and i told him to stop and he says "im just having fun" anyway he then asked for a kiss and i said no i was going to eat my dinner so for the whole night he went in a huff and hasnt spoken to me but he managed to phone his dad for a chat. Was he right to act this way towards me?

OP posts:
pog100 · 06/06/2017 23:14

Of course not. You decide what you want to happen to your body.

Smeaton · 06/06/2017 23:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

WhiteCaribou · 06/06/2017 23:19

The answer to " I'm just having fun" is "well I'm not, it's my body and I'm a person not a plaything"

He's a selfish idiot.

mrholmes · 06/06/2017 23:21

Why couldn't you give him a kiss?

Does he always do this, was he just being playful / horny? Do you normally mind?

Questions Questions.

Did he stop when asked. I personally need to know more e.g if this happens at times and you don't mind you could have just given him a kiss and told him to get lost on playfully. If he does this at times and he knows you don't like it that's different.

Regardless of that. I think a strop is silly but maybe he's just feeling rejected or maybe he feels entitled to get it when he wants???

Original poster
user1466108618 · 06/06/2017 23:27

Hi i didnt want to give him a kiss. And i was putting dinner out. Hes always kind of done it more so back in the early years hes not done it for a while but used to try and touch me even when we were on the bus. Hes been extremely distant from me for a good while now and the slightest thing sets him off.

OP posts:
Original poster
user1466108618 · 06/06/2017 23:29

And we more or less have no sex life and if he instigates it its usually during the night when im sleeping.

OP posts:
LesisMiserable · 06/06/2017 23:38

Do you give him any affection at all?

Catherinebee85 · 06/06/2017 23:42

To be honest I've been like him after long long periods of receiving no affection, no snogs, no sex etc. If this was yet another rejection for him then I can empathise with him I'm afraid. It's pretty hard when you want a kiss from your loved one and they don't even want to give you that.

Out2pasture · 06/06/2017 23:51

pouting when you say no is immature.
you need to sit down and discuss this asap.
may I suggest after saying no not now, you follow up with an alternative time (of course you have to say this in a sensitive and caring way).

Original poster
user1466108618 · 06/06/2017 23:57

No i probably dont give him affection i kinda feel a bit zoned out from him i cant talk to him about anything even things that bother me he tends to roll his eyes.

OP posts:
twattymctwatterson · 07/06/2017 00:04

Shocked that people seem to think unwanted groping and trying to have sex with the OP whilst she's asleep are not major concerns. It sounds like his behaviour towards you has made you not want to sleep with him and it's no wonder really. What are you getting out of the relationship at the moment?

Catherinebee85 · 07/06/2017 00:06

Guess there's a lot more to this than what you've said so far then...

PickAChew · 07/06/2017 00:07

No, he's a bloody pest. You're a human being, not a blow up sex doll.

BlondeB83 · 07/06/2017 00:08

It sounds like he was trying to rekindle things and you rejected him which is of course your choice but I can understand him being upset.

Original poster
user1466108618 · 07/06/2017 00:12

Yes theres prob a lot more than what ive said. Thinking about it i dont get anything really from my relationship.

OP posts:
SparklyMagpie · 07/06/2017 00:28

Why are you with him OP? What are you getting? X

AntiopeofThemyscira · 07/06/2017 00:35

There are no posts on here that make me more grateful to be single than the gropey, sulky DH/DP ones. Honestly they make me feel quite nauseous.

BadHatter · 07/06/2017 03:39

If you were to ask your DP what he gets out of the relationship, how do you think he'd answer?

Why is he still with you? Why are you still with him?

MrsTerryPratchett · 07/06/2017 04:07

And we more or less have no sex life and if he instigates it its usually during the night when im sleeping. Does he have your consent to do this? Because he's sounding more and more sexually abusive.

TheNaze73 · 07/06/2017 08:06

What he did was wrong. However, what is the point in this for either of you if there is no affection.
I can't see what either of you are getting from this.

LesisMiserable · 07/06/2017 10:22

I feel sorry for him, and you. Not even kissing him is really unkind. Its not about being a sex doll but some mnr's always take it to extremes...its about being loving to your partner. If neither of you can do that for the other, let each other go.

Original poster
user1466108618 · 07/06/2017 11:58

My preference would be to get out the relationship but hes having none off that tells me i want to be like my mum ie she was a single parent but its nothing of the sort i just want to be happy. Dont think either of us get anything from the relationship but he doesnt want to split and if i say i do i get the whole hes taking the kids or will kill himself. Perhaps i should just make more of an effort. Thank you all for your imput.

OP posts:
Adora10 · 07/06/2017 12:08

So it's ok to be groped whilst making dinner, no it's not honestly.

He sounds controlling and slightly abusive; going in a huff and not talking to you are classic control tactics; he sounds very immature and you should not make any effort with any partner who is not wiling to treat you as an equal and have a healthy respectful relationship, it's not sounding like that, at all.

Adora10 · 07/06/2017 12:10

Also trying to have sex with you while you sleep is just another example of him trying to control, it's not normal, he's trying to have sex on you rather than with you, just yuck.

Smeaton · 07/06/2017 12:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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