AIBU to want to say he's my boyfriend?

[Confusedandgettingold]

I'm a bit embarrassed to even post this as I'm a middle aged woman (40) and struggling to get beyond this relationship stage!

I've been in several long term relationships, the longest one being 10years that ended a year ago.

I met current love interest 8 months ago and we've been dating (and sleeping with each other) for about 6 months.

We agreed about 6 weeks in that we were exclusively seeing each other and I have no reason to think that he has changed his mind.

BUT...he won't call me his girlfriend. His friends know about me and I have met his closest pals. However I haven't met his family yet. Nor am I rushing to do so. I'm perfectly happy to take things slowly and see where it all goes.

However it does play on my mind that he doesn't want to say we're a couple.

I think I'm too old to be playing this particular game and don't want to waste anymore time.

Is this a red flag? And should I cut my losses and move on?

I think I'm falling in love but it's all beginning to feel frustrating and frankly a bit immature.

AIBU?

DP has referred to me as his girlfriend since early on...I would always (and to an extent still do) refer to him by name...At nearly 50 I just find it 'immature ' to talk about boyfriend / girlfriend lol makes me sound like a teenager...but that's just me

My ex BF introduced me as his "friend" for at least the first 6 months, quite possibly longer. I found it slightly weird but it didn't really bother me as it was pretty obvious to everyone who knew us that we were boyfriend and girlfriend. We were together for 5 years and thinking back, I'm not sure I ever heard him refer to me as his "girlfriend". He just used my actual name.

The mutual (male) close friend who introduced us to each other started referring to us as "wifey" and "hubsy" and my exBF signed off letters he wrote to me as "Hubs". I met his parents about 3 years in (they lived 200 miles away though). He only met my parents after we'd split up! (although they also lived 250 miles away) There was never any doubt that we were in a boyfriend-girlfriend relationship but it did probably take the first year for him to "settle in" to accepting this. He wasn't cheating, he wasn't using me for sex, he was just wary of labelling it I think, particularly as he was just recovering from a broken engagement (ironically the first time I met him was when he'd just got engaged). We lasted 5 years and I was the one to end it. No drama, just not the right guy for me long term.

OP I seriously wouldn't worry about it. As long as he treats you well and makes you happy, that's what counts.

"At nearly 50 I just find it 'immature ' to talk about boyfriend / girlfriend lol makes me sound like a teenager"

If someone said 'is x your boyfriend?' how would you answer?

"I'm not a girl, he is not a boy"

It's not to be taken literally is it? I'm 40 and nobody I know has a problem with these words. I suppose some may use 'other half'.

Well if someone is 'old' I might use lady friend or gentleman friend, but probably not for people in their 40s and 50s.

I'm struggling to see what the problem is. He doesn't like the term girlfriend or partner - seems reasonable. 🤷🏻‍♀️

"I'm struggling to see what the problem is. He doesn't like the term girlfriend or partner - seems reasonable. "

Sounds to me like he wants to have more than one woman at a time. Otherwise why deny their relationship. Also, it's insulting to OP.

"I remember a friend referring to my boyfriend partner in crime as my companion, I felt it was quite aging grin"

Companion is what they used for cohabitee before it became acceptable. Famous people had "companions" while 'plebs' had common law wives and husbands.

How about Esco (pronounced Esso) significant companion/other.