First argument think it will be our last

[moonie70]

Six months in first fall out wasn't sure what would happen but it seems ignoring my txt and leaving me hanging is the way he deals with things.
Back story I went to a reunion last week and I had a good night came home told my bf all about the evening . Told him about a guy who thinks he's gods gift and mentioned he was complimenting me on my profile pic and joking about my boobs , it really was banter and he's married .
I would never cheat I'm 100% loyal and I tell my bf all the time how much I love him .
Well a week later he texts to say some friend of his has said I was sat with the guy all night plus dancing and he bought my drinks .
I'm gobsmaked as I've done nothing wrong was sat with my sister all night and then danced in a group.
I reacted by saying Who said such things , and it hurts you don't trust me . He said your not denying it so it makes me think it's true . I then told him I don't have to justify myself to him and if he didn't trust me to leave me alone I'm done . His response ok I'll leave you alone .
Well it's been a few hours and I've not heard anything .
I've deactivated my fb as I'm so over it and my bf is constantly on there more than me and I don't want to live my life through it .
Before I went off line he had changed his profile pic to just him .
How childish is this from a 50 year old bloke .
I didn't realise he has trust issues . It's double standards to question me when he likes profile pics of all his female mates , and some get the wrong impression as one inboxed him last night with a bizarre request of him to help her find a bf and if he had any mates how strange is that .
I'm just so upset that the guy of all these months that's treated me with love and kindness would just act so out of character . I know he loves me he said he sees us together long term and we've never argued . This week he had a wobble and said he was just waiting for me to give him the elbow , I tried to reassure him not sure why he felt this way
I don't know what to do or think my last txt was just me saying we should talk like adults but nothing back .
I have anxiety and he knows how bad I am and he's left me hanging .
I guess action speak louder than words .
So upset at the thought of another failed relationship . So many insecure men especially with FB I hate it sometimes . Glad I'm off it I guess time will tell , sometimes think I'd be better off on my own , I've been through a lot and it takes a lot out of me to give myself to have it all go wrong again . What would you do any one with advise

I'm going to come at this from a different angle, ie. His. As someone who has been cheated on before, by ExH (many times), I can say that my tolerance for any nonsense at all, in a relationship, is Zero.

Your BF has been cheated on before. And in the worst way possible - you said:

he forgive his ex for getting off with his mate while he was out the room

That's an awful thing to have happened to him.

I think he has no tolerance for any whiff of flirting, and I am the same.

If my DH came home from a reunion, and told me that he had been chatting with a woman who had been openly flirting with him, complimenting his profile, and that they had joked about his cock size etc, I would seriously shut down. If it was 6 months in to the relationship, I would most likely withdraw, just like your BF has done.

To some people, this seems like a massive over reaction, but if you have been really hurt before, it's a snap reaction : the barriers come up. Not only did you have "banter" with this sleeze about your tits, you then relayed this story to your BF thinking it was funny. To someone who has been badly burned before, it's not funny. I would have done exactly the same. Taken it as a warning sign and ran.

On top of this, you told him that you are done. Another warning sign (no empathy for how he is feeling).

You sound like a wind up. You know he's insecure yet you thought you'd share that someone was talking about your body to him. To get a reaction. Then you told him never to contact you again. To get a reaction. You didn't get a reaction and now you're slating him for changing his fb photo. Who's more immature, you or him?

Deary me. If your pm at me is anything to go by I understand why he's not got back in touch even more so now. Truth hurts.

Get the key back, get his stuff out and move on...6mths is nothing...27yrs is!!

you expect him to make allowances for your anxi5from past relationships but you won't do the same for him.

You do sound quite immature, OP.

You can't tell someone to leave you alone and then expect them to contact you; you can, but it's game playing. And I suspect if you're honest with yourself that telling him all about the sleeze commenting on your boobs was game playing too - to see if he would be jealous. Not a nice thing to do and especially not nice since he has previously been cheated on.

Grow up OP.

You told him to leave him alone so he has

Oh come on OP. I echo the above posters, I would say you have acted in a bit of a childish manner. 'Banter' is generally not funny. If my BF came home and told me similar, I damn well wouldn't be laughing. As PP said, if he has been hurt before then chances are he will be looking for any sign of flirting etc.

You both sound very young. Well done on dumping him. Stick to it and move on 👍🏻

You asked him to leave you alone if he didn't trust you. Rightly or wrongly, that's exactly what he's done.

I think you're part of the problem if I'm honest

You know he's insecure yet you went home and told him how another man was complimenting you and commenting on your boobs. What did you expect to happen? You knew what you were doing...

As for him leaving you alone. You've got what you wanted! You told him you were done, so he's left you alone. You didn't even bother to reassure him that what he was told were lies. What's your issue here?? That he hasn't come begging? That he's done what you've asked

Why was he showing you his private Facebook messages?

Yup I think you're both probably best off out of this.
I think you've treated him pretty shit in this instance and he may have over reacted slightly to it.